How to tell friend I no longer want to exchange presents

[BillyBarryBoo]

I am sure some people enjoy choosing presents for family and friends , finding the perfect thing etc.
I am not one of these people!

I have narrowed presents down to family and god children. Hallelujah!

And... One other friend. I do not want to get her a present, or receive a present from her. I have tried in other years to stop exchanging presents. I told her one year I was not swapping presents with her, proceeded to not get her a present. She of course then got me a present anyway and was sad when I had nothing for her. I just feel a leaden sense of obligation (dramatic I know). I cannot keep doing this every Christmas...

So, a breezy " Hey, just to say I'm keeping presents to family this year". Would it suffice? How else to word it? I also don't want her to get a present for my DC. Literally a card is what I'm happy with.

Any suggestions?

Yes, I think a lunch out from now on is appropriate. I'll have that conversation in the spring

Yes - a direct chat is needed. With my friends we always did birthday presents and 2 of us have birthdays close together. It generally ended up on one person to select joint gifts. We agreed this year not to do it any more - but we actually sat and had a discussion about it - and said we would DO something - a meal or activity near birthday weeks. Everyone happy. But being upfront is needed.

@CloseThePackWithAClickClack

Tell her this year you’re donating to charity, and she really wants to buy she’s welcome to donate to charity too, but you and your DC really don’t need anything so please not to get you anything.

This

I feel your pain. I have this situation too but the person won't be dissuaded and also buys presents for my DCs despite it really not being necessary at all as they don't really know each other. I then feel duty-bound to buy presents in return, usually gift vouchers for their favourite shops in which our gifts were bought (it's a general store not a toyshop so there are plenty of things to buy for themselves) plus a small gift to open so in effect I am reimbursing via gift vouchers. It's expensive and unnecessary and I hate the waste involved of time and money. They like giving gifts though so that's why they do it. I have suggested gently and politely and via others that they stop in case they felt beholden to keeping it up, but no, they want to carry on.

I would be honest and ask her "look I really need to know for my planning have you got me and DC a gift this year. I absolutely do not expect one I just could do with knowing."
I she has then accept that it's too late this year and make clear next year (wait a bit don't say immediately after you unwrap it), you won't be giving presents except to immediate family. Leave no uncertainty. Then if she still buys for you that's her choice to it and accept her choice just as she should yours.

@BillyBarryBoo

Yes, I think a lunch out from now on is appropriate. I'll have that conversation in the spring

Why would you want to arrange lunch with someone who you want to distance yourself from as she hurt you?