What is the worst Christmas present you ever received?

[Newdad19]

In the spirit of helping others prevent the same mistakes... what is the worst Christmas present you ever received?

Mines has to be the sculpted hand photo frame I received one year... that looked like someone's decapitated hand that held a photo for you in its palm

Padded hangers

Drawer liners

A scottie dog nemo chalkboard with one of the dogs legs broken off.

A very out of date bottle of something (I can't remember exactly, it went in the bin) with an really old logo of asda (from the 90s) on it.

A hairbrush set when I was following the curly girl method.

A homemade Christmas cake covered in white icing and lashings of cat hair.

Bottles of vodka from BHS when I've never drank vodka and I was pregnant.

A wine glass with the name Laura on it. My name's not Laura.

A packet of slimmers noodles from DB. I'm a size 8. Not that it would be an acceptable gift for a person of any size. At some point I was short on lunch options and gave them a try - the most disgusting thing I've ever eaten, like slimy cooked worms!

A packet of opened hemp seeds (also from DB).

A set of incredibly thin, cheap and nasty towels from MiL. I was quite put out at the time. But later (after having kids) realised they were the perfect thing for taking to the beach as they pack so small....

@TolkiensFallow

My ex once gave me one of my own books. Wrapped up. Twat.

Was it 'The Hobbit' or 'Lord of the Rings'?

When I was about ten my Nan gave me a couple of G-string swimsuits, along with one that appeared normal. Except when I got it wet at the beach and it went completely and utterly see-through

YANBU I thinking the future vaccination will be mandatory. Workplaces just won't be able to function if people have to keep self isolating.

@venusmay wrong thread?

Sorry for some reason this has posted in the wrong place!

A mobile phone top up voucher

I kid you not!

Ex thought l liked talking and liked vouchers so what a brilliant present.

Potato ricer from my husband to be

Two - same uncle. Copy of Of Mice and Men in Russian (I was 12ish and didn’t and don’t speak Russian). Toothpaste dispenser that looked like a knockoff Star Wars spaceship - took ages to work out what it was (think heavy grey plastic) but it made for a good Boxing Day game ‘guess the shit present’. Oh and my great aunt once sent me a purse with the words ‘prayer changes things’ written on the outside and three pound coins inside. She’d sent my brother £500 quid, so it felt a bit pointed. My bro was kind and so immediately split the cash between us equally.

Some clip on sparkly bird Christmas tree decorations. The birds themselves were cute, but I was in the midst of a horrific break-up, had had to move out of the house I shared with my ex and was basically living on sofas with my stuff stored in my parents' shed, so I didn't exactly need nik naks at that point in time.

A size 24 purple coatigan with wide elbow length sleeves from the old lady range at Debenhams.
I was a size 16.
I tried to exchange it only to be told it was down to £1 as it was ‘old stock’. Thanks MIL.

An iron, off my ex.

My worst presents always come curtesy of my uncle (he does have some mental health problems so I don’t think he realises) Christmas was random tat such as a crystallised parrot key ring (that was half the price at 50p! Last of the big spenders), second was a scarf, not just any scarf but a craptastic multicoloured fake fur scarf (from a pound shop) and thirdly was a cheap plastic mood ring that would only fit a child (I’m 38!) god only knows what this years crap will be

My worst was a birthday present rather than a Christmas present. An older friend gave me a second hand dress that had been gifted to her with the words “it was too big for me so l thought it might fit you.” It was grey (a colour that makes me look as if l should be six feet under), of a style that has never been fashionable (think extra from Little House on the Prairie) and probably size 26-28. I was size 14 at the time, smaller than her.

Some of these are heartbreaking.

My oddest one is a book about the uses of vinegar.

Don’t think anything will beat 3 dead rats

@DavidDevantsSpiritWife

Many years ago exH bought me a beautiful personalised artisan leather makeup bag. Only problem was it was personalised with the OW's name. The one he gave her was personalised with my name.

I can laugh about it now but I've had better Christmas mornings

So did you file that under Lovelife, or Miscellaneous?

(Believe it or not my bestie bought me that album for Christmas the year we met! - He used to sing "Ginger" at me, the twat, because I am and he thinks it's funny.)

A bag of flour from DS2, it was a joke though as he wanted me to cook him something special. I did get a proper one too. Some of you have truly awful families 😯

This isn't about my useless presents but we used to hold a fundraising effort after Christmas of unwanted presents at work. Some were quite good, just not what the recipient wanted and we used to raise quite a lot of money. However, some of the worst ones (which sometimes sold but were always good for a laugh and a great talking point in the communal kitchen) were:

A bottle of port which came in each year from a teetotaller's aunt
A Primark mankini
An Elvis onesie
A Liz Earle shaving kit from a man with a beard (which he had sported for about 30 years).

Last year my grandad sent me a keyring, with a picture of his cat on it. Only his cat had died a few months before. Poor bastard really loved that cat. Still don’t know why he sent me this (bless him!)

Loving these! Can't think of anything myself, maybe I have suppressed the memories of crap Xmas gifts lol 😆