Poncetastic 2020

[VivaJen]

I came on looking for the annual thread but can't find it so here is the start (courtesy of Fellatio - wherever you are)

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

@Shark2020 homemade craft or homemade food? If it's craft you can cheat 🤭 and get on to the Woolly Hugs Christmas sale on FB. Lots of crafty bits up for sale from 17th to 22nd November. First bid for each sale item wins it. There are auction items too but they usually go for ££.

If it's food then maybe some flavoured vodka or gin - lots of recipes online or some biscuits (shortbread is nice and easy).

Nothing specific has been mentioned just homemade, we are only in one day a week on site in pairs so guessing can't be anything such as cookies/fudge etc as we might get someone who may not be able to pick it up for say a week

Thanks for the suggestion Woolly, I did stitched cards last year that turned out well so maybe could do similar to the picture with beads. I'll save the silver thread for something crocheted though; it's sparkle makes me smile 🌟 (I like shiny things...proper magpie )

Well, it is not the 11th but I started paper whites today - my excuse for tardiness is that it is typically less cold here so a day won't make much of a difference.

I'm mostly knitting. Furiously! 2 of 4 blankets done. One half done. The yarn for the 4th is out of sight so that don't panic. Also knitting snowmen (because of you lot!) and have 2 done, 2 to go. I'll have to quit work or sleep at this rate.

Oh. More.

@lucysmam sorry for late reply but your wrist warmers are gorgeous! ❤️

I started my paper whites today. Fed my Christmas cake. I would cheat and buy some homemade fudge and transfer to kilner jar and tie with ribbon. Or if you have slow cooker, try slow cooker fudge.
Can I just say I love this thread.

@foresttheout I last made fudge as a teenager and we hadn’t even heard of a sugar thermometer. We used a glass of cold water and put a drop of the mixture in. It basically shows you what will happen when it cools because the small bit cools rapidly in the cold water. When it turns into a soft ball it’s ready.

Mine was always a bit grainy and I remember my granny saying it was because I was stirring too much, and scraping the sides of the pot down so ending up with sugar crystals. But I lost interest in making fudge before finding out if she was right

@Carriemac I put my pine cones in a sealed bag with scented oils for a couple of weeks and then add some to my garlands (I’m lazy and just pop them in at random; only the wreath ones need to be wired) and I put some in a basket with a battery string of fairy lights to sit on the hearth. One year I softened the bottom of pillar candles and pressed small pine cones in, with smaller larch cones in the gaps to make a sort of wreath on the candles and then fretted that I’d forget them and they are essentially firelighters I might try making a wreath this year if I can find some more.

Aw, thank you for all the nice comments about my wristwarmers; they've made me smile!

No poncing today other than painting loo roll tubes, for what seems like the millionth time, to make snowflakes with dd2 ❄ & a bit more spring cleaning. I'll look at cards again tomorrow - it's likely to be a very quiet weekend.

I’ve been poncing our doll house this morning. Some years we have elves come to stay in December; other years it’s been mice (not as destructive as Tom Thumb and Hunca Munca thankfully). They decorate the house for Christmas, and add in some new furniture and bits and pieces.
This morning I made a snow cover for the roof, and two little stockings to hang by the mantle. I’m not completely happy with the snow as it’s just cheap pounshop stuff but if I can find a nice low pile fake fur or white velvet I’ll redo it, and I can use what I’ve done this morning as a template. There are dormer windows so it took a while to figure it out. I don’t want to spend much more as I have to be very, very strict not to bankrupt ourselves. And anyway, it’s nice to leave things for next year too.

@Shark2020 could you do one of those layered cookie jar things? So all the dried ingredients to make your own cookies in a pretty jar with a nice label with the recipe on? That way it's made by you, but would keep if the person can't collect straight away?

Ooh now that might be a good idea, might have to pinch that one thank you. I'd like that, and there's a few with young kids who would enjoy making it. Thank you.

Would Christmas path lights count as poncing? Any recommendations please? Aiming for fun but not tacky, on a budget 🎇

I’m fascinated by the chocolate shaker. I’ve been using a milk carton to do that for years; if I’m using up the last bit of milk, I pour it all back in and give it a good shake. A spoon of cream in the mix takes it to another level.
I don’t think I could bring myself to spend £25 pounds on it but then you can’t give a gift of an empty milk carton either 😂

Argh wrong thread! Though my hot chocolate has always been considered a bit poncy.

@thelegohooverer I've spent £25 on a milk frother for the girls & bought assorted hot choc related bits. It sounded fun on the bargain threads!

Any idea how to attach the flowers I bought to my tree? I can't find the alligator clips I'm sure I have...think they're in my Rainbows/Guides cupboard after a sort out of "things I won't use but they might" 🙄 turns out I would have after all! I wondered if those twisty tie things might be strong enough if I glue gun them on?

Lucysmam, are the flowers the ones you bought a few weeks ago? poinsettias etc? If so, yes, I think the twisty ties should be OK. I have used fine wire for similar activities.
I can’t remember whether Wilko is convenient for you, just that you found empty shelves. They now have lots of pink tree decorations including strings of beads for £1, but delivery charge is £3.95 and no click and collect.

I have now taken possession of gravity candles (the ones you hang over the branches of your Xmas tree with no wires and then you can operate then with a remote) and have bought the Benni wreath from Rowen and Wren to do some poncing and hang on the chimney breast in the lounge. Am thinking of some ivy from the garden and maybe some dried orange slices (made those and had no idea what to do with them!)

Mincemeat time this weekend too!

TrickyD, yep they're the ones. I don't think the flowers will be too heavy for them & could sort of prop them up with branches if I needed to I think.

I'll have a look at Wilko online. I think I might just use the more subtle ones I already have on the tree for this year though. I'm imagining town being chaos once shops re-open properly & trying not to spend too much unnecessarily (dd1's present may be a bit more than I originally budgeted for a decent one so need to save a bit more )

"I have now taken possession of gravity candles (the ones you hang over the branches of your Xmas tree with no wires and then you can operate then with a remote) "

@RestorationInsanity these sound interesting do you have a photo? Where did you acquire them from please?

I bought them www.ukchristmasworld.com. They're called 10 LED Lit Candle Set with Remote Control and Hanging Jewels on there. They were a good price compared with other sights and I was buying a tree stand from there anyway. I've bought two packs as we buy a biggish tree. Am looking forward to the glittery sparklyness!

I've just made clementine candles with the kids.

@BigBadBox they look effective; how did you do them?

Thanks @boholady for suggesting Corrine Lapierre. I've just finished the peacock. It's nothing like perfect but for a first attempt at hand sewing i'm pleased. The little robin will be my next attempt.

@lucysmam
I love them they're very easy to make for how pretty they are.

Cut clementine in half round the equator
Carefully remove flesh, you should be left with a little bit of sticky up pith in the middle which will be the wick
Eat flesh
Pour about a teaspoon of olive oil into the half shell
Light