Poncetastic 2020

[VivaJen]

I came on looking for the annual thread but can't find it so here is the start (courtesy of Fellatio - wherever you are)

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

@waitingforadulthood I'm sure @Trumpton said 11th Nov?

I started paperwhites yesterday with the kids; a quick google at the time said it was okay. Apparently they bloom for a good 6 weeks so you've quite a long window : )

Grrrr; the scraps from the cushions are not where I thought they were & I've done several of my 'spring cleaning' jobs already 🙄

[quote lucysmam]**@waitingforadulthood* I'm sure @Trumpton* said 11th Nov?[/quote]
Yes , generally on 11th November but crack on .
Please post photos . We can have a narcissi watch !

I found the odd scraps from the cushions in...one of my craft boxes 🙄 I now have lots of flags cut ready to press & sew tomorrow.

Ooh my BFF tried sending me some snaps to make my own crackers, we didn't think they'd get through customs but they arrived this morning! So happy, I've never tried to make crackers before, woo!

Oh brilliant! Once they get here, I'll crack on. Hope my usual black fingers don't kill the poor things.

Went shopping today (sorry to all in lockdown) and found blush pink baubles in matalan and silver snowflakes to hang in my new kitchen I'm thrilled.

LucysMam- asda and matalan had full sets of pink baubles in- I think it's the colour of the year so once your lockdown is over you should be able to find some x

Lucysmam, the Wilko advert has pink baubles plus various other pink bits and pieces.

I was in Wilko last Wednesday for a few bits & had a quick look at the Christmas stuff; lots of empty shelves to be seen. I will check again though if I get chance.

I'll look at Asda and Matalan too; see if they maybe deliver decorations which would save me a trip out to look.

Thank you both.

Does anybody have a fool proof fudge recipe that doesnt require evaporated milk or a sugar thermometer? Not in the UK and evaporated milk costs a fortune and I can't find a sugar thermometer anywhere. For some reason I've decided I'm going to be handing out little brown boxes of fudge flavoured with people's favourite things. So far I've produced gloop and a very tasty sauce. Sadly I'm not sure handing out paper boxes of toffee sauce will work

Sorry forest, no suggestions here. The one and only time we attempted fudge, it didn't quite set 🤷‍♀️

I have 17 mini bunting flags sewn...stalled at how long to make my binding so going to look up a tutorial later on.

Evening all! Inspired by talk of cracker snaps, I've just ordered some, and I'm saving loo roll inners (as there's only 4 of us for Christmas it shouldn't take long).

I've also decided that I'm going to do the recipe from Nigella's Christmas for my pudding. The mix makes enough for a 3 pint basin so I'll probably do a couple of smaller ones, and possibly some teeny ones (enough for one person) for gifts. Bought prunes today in preparation, not something I normally have in the store cupboard.

No fudge recipe from me either, sorry forrest. I'm sure there will be someone on the thread with a good one.

Just bought a foldaway dining table. We've been needing one for ages but we're very overcrowded.

Husband is thinking of all the practical things, I'm limbering up for a good Ponce. Centrepiece. Serving bowls. Individual place markers.

@foreforesttheout all my fudge and tablet recipes have evap milk in but I'm happy to see if we can post you some. Pantry staple here as we're Scottish and it's not a celebration without Tablet. Do you mind saying where you are?

Made frangipani mice pies to day - they almost look like these and I've sampled 2 already

Crikey, Carriemac, where did you get your mice from?

They look delicious @Carriemac!

Next poncing for me is attempting a cross stitch card for my elderly great aunt. I've done loads of felt advent calendar kits but I haven't done a cross stitch since I was a child. I feel I may be biting off more than I can chew with baby arriving sometime in the next 3 weeks but I can't seem to settle to baby related stuff (like packing a hospital bag!)

Hello everyone It is so relaxing to catch up with the thread and see everyone's poncing efforts.
Sorry @foresttheout, the only fudge recipe I know/use contains condensed milk.
I have been sprouting avocado pits for what feels like forever now, in a bid to grow avocado trees as Christmas presents... I have 4 just sprouted but am losing faith that they will be big enough by the end of Dec. Oh well.
Happy poncing everyone!

@foresttheout I've googled and there seem to be a few recipes for fudge using dulce de leche instead of condensed milk. Can you get hold of that?

foresttheout I have made fudge with this
recipes loads of times without a sugar thermometer. There’s some advice about how to look for the soft ball stage online but I just stood over it stirring constantly for the time advised and then placed a tiny amount on a cold plate, if it rolls into a little ball it’s ready.

Would you try making your own condensed milk? I’ve not done it myself but I had a google and found this recipe for condensed milk Might be worth a go. Good luck!

@RhinestoneCowgirl that's very kind but sadly I'm in a developing country and the postal system is awful. Any parcels that don't go missing usually require a huge "fee" (aka bribe) to get them released by customs.
I had more success with last nights attempt, I poured it thinly to see if it would set quickly and it has. Texture is a little grainy though.
@joHo123 I hadn't even considered that I'll check it out thankyou

TrickyD it's my own mincemeat from
Last years ponceing
I have a massive bag of pinecones- any ideas ?

I am sure mincemeat from last year will be perfectly fine Carriemac.
I was just interested to know who your supplier of mice was. 😀🐭🐀🐁

For those worried about last years mincemeat, I only make a large batch every couple of years. Last tear, I found a 5 year old jar at the back of a cupboard and OKG was it good?! Delish!!

As long as you have enough booze in the original mix, it keeps well and matures to be more mellow and tasty as time goes on.

Festive mini bunting finished; I had just under 3m of binding so just filled that. No idea where it's going 🤷‍♀️

I have a scrap that's 90cm x 16cm left. Any quick & easy ideas for it? I'll have a scroll of Pinterest shortly and see what's on there