Poncetastic 2020

[VivaJen]

I came on looking for the annual thread but can't find it so here is the start (courtesy of Fellatio - wherever you are)

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

My house is smelling lush this morning. First Christmas cake is currently baking as I type. Dd2 says she's never made one with me (I had a moment...she's always baking with me!) so she helped & keeps popping in for a look through the glass

Debating whether to carry on 'spring cleaning' today. Or just mooch for the afternoon with some crafty bits since I've done quite a lot of other stuff already today.

Like this Forest?

I will try it myself. We cut ours down to 8ft and for a bit it grew the little round leaves but has run away again.

www.bhg.com/christmas/wreaths/seeded-eucalyptus-wreath-diy/

Pics for wreath

@Canklesforankles oh good, I shall make sure to put them up for lots of suggestions then!

My lovely SIL is making us a wreath from holly etc so I can benefit from someone else's poncing in that department.

@MissEWeatherwax and @Withershins to you both and thank you for answering my question a while back! I feel so rude, didn’t mean to ignore you - I’m terrible for popping onto a thread briefly, then promptly forgetting about it for a week or two...

@Canklesforankles

I’ve been doing some charity shop mooching and picked up some slightly blingtastic kitsch bits. Must stop browsing.

Not sure where the bambis are going yet or what to put in the rose bowl.

Absolutely love the bambis! 🥰🥰🥰

So impressed with everything on this thread - all the homemade/crafted things are fantastic!

@lucysmam I hope you didn’t unravel that lovely snowflake/star (I have a shockingly terrible memory and already can’t remember which it actually was 🙄🙄) - it’s your very first one and deserves a place on your tree! I would love to be able to crochet but really don’t have the patience to learn, or haven’t in the past. Maybe I should give it a concerted try this year - I’ve got all of November to practice and I would love to make some snowflakes/stars for the tree.

Can someone please help me?

I’m using an iPad and whenever I click on an attached picture to enlarge it, the picture moves all over the page.

I once managed to get it to stay still but I’ve never managed it since.

@Ninkanink no I didn't pull it. Dd2 told me off for even thinking about it! She's claimed it to go on her little tree (when we eventually buy it).

I decided to cross a couple more bits off my pre-Christmas clean & have gone through all three shelf units in the living room. Lots of outdated work policy docs, stuff I've got on memory stick & lockdown home-school work have gone in the recycling.

I've gone through the pantry & checked dates are ok on everything; chucked a few bits dated 2016/2017 - I figured if we haven't used them by now then we're not likely to.

I might do the tinned food shelf, nip for milk and then a bit more crochet.

Love all your poncing! At 60days today, I'm getting well into the ponce grove, and have begun wrapping. I use fabric to wrap, and these are all cotton fabric wrapped, and I'll attach live greenery before they are finished, but I'm happy so far.

I've also got some polystyrene sheets that came with a clock that I'm trying to utilise into Christmas scenes to put in the upstairs windows- perhaps with candles / fairy lights behind to illuminate. This is my first attempt- it's rough but I'll improve and have loads left.

I'm envious of everyone's food poncing- I'm itching to start but my kitchen is under renovation so hard to do. I've bought three bottles of gin in the last few week, all with the intent of marmalade gin, and none have fulfilled that destiny

I’m loving this thread though I’m a very amateur poncer. I’m thinking of making my own mincemeat this year for the first time. Does anyone have any recommendations? Someone upthread mentioned Nigella’s recipe but I’m also wondering about Delia’s, which contains suet, which seems more traditional. Any tips would be gratefully received.

#waitingforadulthood they are beautiful! Super-poncetastic, truly! Are they for your household or very lucky people who live elsewhere? Am just wondering how you get your lovely fabric back for next year...

And speaking of marmalade gin, 1) Has anyone made any yet? and 2) Is it any good?

Cleared out my garden shed yesterday. Got new shelves up and cleared out DH's wonderful half-used grass seed, 3 broken lawn mowers and various bits of wood. It now houses my wine stash...

@DuckonaBike, I do Delia's with vegetable suet.

Or a cider-based one from a GH the other year.

@Lalanbaba I too will be the owner of a new chest freezer before the week is out (I hope). I will be stashing uncooked sausage rolls, cooked mince pies, various doughs rolled into sausages and wrapped (savoury shortbread, choc chip) and I hope to make some flavoured butters (garlic, tarragon from greenhouse and maybe something else).

I might also make a few portions of curry for those days when we don't fancy anything too Christmassy or rich.

@rhihaf

#waitingforadulthood they are beautiful! Super-poncetastic, truly! Are they for your household or very lucky people who live elsewhere? Am just wondering how you get your lovely fabric back for next year...

And speaking of marmalade gin, 1) Has anyone made any yet? and 2) Is it any good?

Cleared out my garden shed yesterday. Got new shelves up and cleared out DH's wonderful half-used grass seed, 3 broken lawn mowers and various bits of wood. It now houses my wine stash...

Sorry @waitingforadulthood, I'm still learning how to press buttons correctly ....

Thanks NoWordForFluffy !

@DuckonaBike. I use a recipe very similar to Delia's, which is very good. I gave it to a friend, who made it with pears instead of apples; very interesting..

@rhihaf
I make marmalade gin from the Good Housekeeping recipe.
It’s amazing topped up with Prosecco but less dangerous with lemonade .
HERE
I also add about 300gms of sugar to make it more syrupy .

I am failing in my poncing efforts. I have now cut and botched 2 separate stockings for the household (can't get lining to be right size for stocking and can't ease it sufficiently to make it work). So I will either have to give up entirely, or probably start again....

Although DH laughed, but mostly recognised, the various felt foods I'd made (he thought the sausages were carrots, but recognised the pasta bows - which DD had no clue of though she recognised sausages). But when he saw they were going into a shopping basket (from M&S little food in summer), he thought it was a nice present for younger DCs - it's for 1 of 2 potential DNieces (both love to play in their kitchens).

Food efforts have taken a back seat recently.

@lucysmam I’m so glad to hear it! If I wanted to make some what size needle and what type of yarn would you recommend?

@waitingforadulthood I’m going to use fabric and ribbons for gift wrapping this year too (and going forward). Yours look absolutely beautiful!

I’m excited about finding bargains on eBay. I already have loads of decorative bits and bobs I can use for embellishment.

Ok so my very tentative plans for poncing are as follows:

Bake my way through my favourite biscuits, cakes, spiced buns and breads from home (Denmark) throughout November and December

Make our own mincemeat/mince pies

We’ve decided against Christmas cake(s) this year; we’re going to make an Italian chocolate and nut cake instead

Paper angels for the tree

Paper angels for the bay windows

Wreath for the front door

Garland of paper decorations for the tree (not decided on theme for this yet)

Woven paper hearts for tree or to hang from decorative branch

Gingerbread hearts with ribbon ties for tree or to hang from decorative branch

Fresh foliage centrepiece

Garland for staircase

And maybe a crochet snowflake or two if I can manage it to a good enough standard by December!

I love Christmas and all the extra stuff but not sure I'd describe it as poncey. Am I allowed here? Is there some kind of qualifying test to see if I'm poncey enough?

@Plussizejumpsuit
You passed any test ( there isn’t one ) just by posting on here !

I am so delighted to find my people!! I love the creative build up to Christmas. I have made our Christmas cards {I am a digital artist/digital scrapbooker} one carton drawn version, one cute photo version, I have designed our December album {I do a daily page of photos and a couple of lines of what's what and print it in a Blurb book} and I have finished the big kids {twenty something year olds} advent calendars. :) Tempted to wrap gifts but concerned the bows will get squashed....