This thread has educated and traumatised me in equal measures.
It seems to show that some people want cash or an Amazon voucher, but an equal number of people would be deeply offended by such a gift because it makes them feel you didn't think they were worth the effort of puzzling out their secret desires.
This is discrimination against those of us who lack any natural talent or affinity for shopping. Surely I can't be the only person who really has put loads of thought, and a bit more money than they could properly afford, into choosing what they thought was a special gift, only to watch it being received without enthusiasm, to lie dropped and forgotten along with the wrapping paper?
My choices were obviously not appreciated, and after a generous cash gift was accepted one memorable Christmas with the hurtful aside "easy come, easy go" I decided not to bother trying so hard. If people insist on exchanging presents that nobody wants, or needs, then surely charity gifts are the ideal solution? What do you get for someone who wants for nothing and can afford to buy themselves anything they fancy? Nowt, you give it to charity instead, and send them a card saying "Look what you just donated". I know I'd appreciate that a lot more than another bloody bath bomb because, despite all the times you have stayed here, you somehow managed to forget that my house has a big walk in shower - but no sodding bath"
I never gave any cows or goats, because I'd have to know the recipient really well before I'd trust them with a live animal, but I assumed there'd be pleasure in knowing your gift went towards funding a mobile veterinary clinic, books for school girls, or seeds and tools needed to grow enough vegetables to feed a family, rather than being something you took to the charity shop, or hid in the back of a drawer. Now you lot tell me that some people don't like charity gifts!
This year I was planning on giving Kiva gift cards. Someone on a mumsnet thread about charities that benefit women mentioned www.kiva.org a while back, I'd read about how microloans paid to women benefit their children, elderly relatives and the wider community and was interested to be part of that. The website has a search facility that allowed me to find 3 older women, (in Lebanon, Samoa and Tajikistan,) who were asking for microloans to help them expand their businesses and change their lives for the better. As the first repayments have started rolling in, I can now go back and search for another woman asking for a bit of help. I blithely assumed that anyone I gave a Kiva gift card to for Christmas would be delighted, but now I'm feeling really discouraged. Perhaps the recipients will be offended, and won't even bother using the cards?
Nah, buggrit. I just read the terms and conditions and they say that " Kiva Cards automatically convert to a donation if not redeemed within 12 months after purchase." so it's Kiva cards for all this festive season. Problem solved!