Please help me celebrate Christmas!

[CrazyPineapple]

So my DH and I are ex-jehovahs witnesses.
But my parents and my husband's parents are still very much part of that religion (As are our extended families... so all aunts, uncles, cousins etc) so no Christmas celebrating relatives, sadly.
I struggled last year, our first year celebrating, as I've never celebrated one (neither has my husband)! It just ended up a ton of presents and confusion!

I'd like to ask you all what I should be doing for Christmas. Build up to Christmas, Christmas day etc... I have a DS4 who I want to make it truly special for... It all feels so alien to me.
He believes in Santa etc, but does 1 present come from Santa or all of them etc?
HELP guide me, I feel like an absolute idiot!
Thank you.

For me Christmas is the whole month of December. Our decorations go up the first weekend of December, early for some people but I take mine down on 27th so I can sort all the new toys out!
We watch Christmas movies, I play Christmas songs whilst cooking/eating dinner most nights. We wrap up and go for walks to look at Christmas lights. See Santa.
Christmas morning all the presents under he tree are from Santa. This is what my mom always did when I was a kid so I followed it. Although now I wish I did 1 from Santa and the rest from us. Never mind!
Have a wonderful Christmas. My OH is ex JW so I kind of know how you feel. He celebrated his first Christmas 5 years ago and he absolutely bloody LOVES it now!

Also advent calendars for the kids, which they love opening every morning!
New Christmas pajamas for when the tree goes up. We also take them to pick a new tree decoration each every year, oh and myself pick one too haha!

Aw. How lovely to start your own traditions from scratch and how exciting!

So firstly, I guess I need to confess that I never told my kids about Santa because, coming from a strict catholic background I didn't want to lie to them and make them believe things that aren't true (as my family did). So whilst they obviously knew about him from friends and so on, I never did the pretend thing with them.

Christmas prep - we get a real tree 2 weeks before Christmas and I play Christmas music whilst the kids help me decorate (it will be messy, you can rearrange once they are in bed). Tip: Keep your tree standing in a container of water as it stops the needles from dropping.

We also hunt in the woods for pine cones that we spray silver as tree decorations. Plus holly and ivy to decorate the fireplace with.

Do an online food order beforehand and pick it up the day before Christmas eve so you don't have to run around the shops with the horde.

On Christmas Eve we do go to church, but this is a choice you might not want to make. Then the kids unwrap one present each, have a hot mince pie and go to bed whilst dh and I have a bottle of wine.

On Christmas morning they come down to lots of new decorations up in the main room. I have a candle lit to get a nice Christmas smell going. All their presents are in pillow cases which sounds daft, but it's a family tradition.

The meal is in the afternoon followed by a walk, if the weather is good.

But this is your Christmas so feel free to set your own traditions and make it as special as you want!

Our traditions:

We have 24 Christmas story books which are numbered 1-24, we put numbers in a jar and every day in December the dc pick a number at random and we read that story

A Christmas film every Sunday in December

On Christmas Eve the dc receive a box 'from the elves' containing new pjs, bath bombs, hot chocolate supplies. We have hot chocolate while watching Father Christmas

We have a buffet style dinner on Christmas Eve night

The dc put out the usual for Santa and Rudolph

We all have a stocking and the presents in the stocking, all small inexpensive things, are from Santa but the presents under the tree are from whoever bought them

We open stockings all together in our bed first, then have a special breakfast before opening other presents

After Christmas lunch the dc play with their new toys, dh and I usually end up dozing off

Christmas evening we play a board game or similar together then we'll watch a Christmas special or a film and have turkey sandwiches, cheese etc if anyone has room

Both ds and I are autistic so our Christmas is very organised but it's still fun!

@golddustwomen thank you! It's so nice you understand! I've always loved the thought of celebrating Christmas! Felt like such a sin... I will get advent calendars this year. Is elf on the shelf a must? I have no idea....

You can pick and choose the traditions and activities you like most.

We like looking at other houses' lights on a walk in the dark, writing letters to Santa, watching Christmas films, making paper chains, decorating a gingerbread house, going to the theatre. Portable North Pole is good to spread the magic. Carols in the square in the village with a hot chocolate, choosing a real tree and one new decoration each at the garden centre.

We're not into Christmas eve boxes, new pyjamas, duvets or elf on the shelf.

@RhubarbsBack thank you. It does feel weird as I feel like I've been lied to for so many years, only to put another lie on my son! But I've never pushed it, but never corrected him. I'd hate for him to be that little brat that says 'santa isn't real' etc to other kids at school... it's nice to think maybe we'll just create our own Christmas. It's only watching films I've based my ideals on and it's so hard to live up to!
@HippyChickMama
Thank you! I appreciate your input. I love the thought of the story books!
I think I'm going to have to start writing all these suggestions down

Our tree goes up the first weekend in December.

We watch a movie or two each weekend in December, some of our favourites are: Elf, Arthur Christmas, Polar Express, Home Alone and the Santa Clause.

Since my dcs were small we have always visited Santa at Beamish.

I carried the tradition of new pjs on Christmas Eve over from my childhood.

Santa brings one present in our house and all the rest are from parents or whoever is named on the tag.

Christmas Eve we leave a cake or a cookie for Santa, a glass of milk and a carrot for the reindeer.

Oh don't start the elf thingy! Enough to give any child nightmares and I can't see the appeal !
Definitely one to avoid imho!

Happy Christmas. Enjoy !

We decorate on the first of December and that's when christmas starts for us (even though I'm in christmas mode since September 😂) I make a massive portion of hot chocolate in the slow cooker and have toppings galore, we do 1st December box and we watch a xmas movie in our new pyjamas surrounded by Christmas decorations. We have advent calendars, elf on the shelf every single day. During December we watch a christmas movie every single night, I make a list of all christmas movies on Netflix/amazon prime/sky and fold the titles up and put them into a lucky dio hat so we blindly choose a film every night (this stops arguments) we also read a book, I've already purchased this years book "the Christmasaurus" we attend christmas parades when they switch the town's Christmas lights on, we attend a many christmas markets, we usually book to have breakfast with Santa, christmas plays, pantomime. We also bake Christmas treats, write christmas cards (kids write to all their classmates).

Well, at least you don't have anyone insisting you see them on Christmas Day.

At 4 a trip to see Santo can be lovely (or not). Some places do lovely Christmas events ie English Heritage. The right panto can be great at 4 too.

Never done the Elf on the Shelf (it sounds hard work), but I love an advent calendar. The lego one is great but one year we got a tiny tree and had tiny decorations in the advent calendar, that was amazing.

We love Christmas Eve, it's always a stay at home day with nice food and we did crafts when the children were younger. When our youngest was little we'd get craft kits from somewhere and make decorations etc. We'd also make homemade crackers.

Boxing day is great for a bit of fresh air, a trip to the beach is my favourite.

We don't do elf on shelf- too much hassle for me!
Our Christmas:
Our decorations go up early December. We usually have advent calendars which tell the Christmas story, and we go regularly to church so we hear the build up through advent each Sunday.
We have new Christmas PJs on Christmas Eve- wrapped.
Christmas Day- stockings with little bits & pieces & fun things (mini tins of lemonade, chocolates, smelly pens, fun socks, Christmas loo roll, bath bombs, hot choc sachets etc) before breakfast.
Church then cold lunch of lots of things I don't usually buy (posh ham/smoked salmon/ dips/ olives etc) presents after lunch. Then Christmas film/walk/play with new toys/games. Eat Christmas dinner about 5 o clock with champagne.
Always lots of Christmas music- both pop and classic carols. Christmas isn't Christmas to me without the music.

And mulled wine & mince pies.

I have these throughout December.

I forgot about Christmas music. I have lots of Christmas CDs and they get played a lot. Tom Chaplin did a great one a couple of years ago, as did Kelly Clarkson but there are lots of affordable compilations you can get. Not very techy here.

And watch The Snowman, I love a Christmas movie.

Oh my goodness @CrazyPineapple I wish you were my friend! I'd gladly handhold through all the traditions between now and the big day!
I'd suggest buying yourself the Good Housekeeping Christmas cookbook and sit down with your family and decide what food you'd all like then it will tell you how far in advance you need to make it.
For me the different foods are a huge part of the celebrations

My Christmas traditions include

A real tree. I'd buy one expensive bauble a year, and occasional packs of cheaper ones to fill the gaps. The tree was usually bought about ten days before Christmas, and kept in the garage. I put it up and decorate it late on Christmas Eve, and early on Christmas morning would make sure the tree was lit up, so that it was part of the Christmas surprise.

We had several Christmas books that we read every year during December. Your little one might like The Jolly Christmas Postman.

Mistletoe hanging up in the hall, to encourage Christmas hugs & kisses.

Father Christmas brought the stocking. Large woolly socks, the child hangs one up, and you secretly pack the other one so you can do a swift exchange late at night. I used to wrap up each individual item, to increase the excitement. It's the Law that there must be a Lindt chocolate Father Christmas sticking out of the top!

Letters to Father Christmas are a lot of fun for children to do. You can also get letters from FC to your child, some charities do this, which is lovely, you will start seeing the adverts for them soon.

On Christmas Eve you should leave a mince pie and a glass of sherry out for Father Christmas and a carrot for the reindeer. You can drink the sherry later!

Try to go to a panto or a carol concert or an evening walk to see the Christmas lights.

Happy Christmas to you and your family, you will have so much fun!

Christmas is mostly about the build up.
Step 1. Decorate the tree (we play Christmas music and have candles lit while we do.) Advent calendar from 1st December.
Step 2. Letters to Santa. Buy a couple of things from the list, plus stockings (sweets, bubble bath, books, small toys, satsuma)
Step 3. Christmas shopping for one another/ friends. Help dc choose a present for dh. Best done at night when Christmas lights are on, with a break for a mince pie and hot choc.
Step 4. Get something for children’s toy appeal.
Step 5. Watch a Christmas movie every weekend, increasing frequency in the week before.
Step 6. Walk around your local area looking at lights, then home for hot choc/ visit Santa
Step 7. Christmas treat food in the week before and after the big day.
Step 8. On the night leave out stockings (keep a spare stuffed ready to swap when dc is asleep) and a mince pie and drink for Santa (remember to eat these)
The big day- be prepared to be woken early. Unwrap presents, then either a treat breakfast or sweets from stockings are appropriate. Christmas music on after breakfast. Dc plays with new stuff, you can use/ wear/ whatever your presents. Dinner mid afternoon with Christmas crackers, followed by a nap or a walk, snacks in the evening if needed. Light scented candles, or fairy lights.

Thank you all so much. I must admit I feel so emotional with all your lovely messages, and a little less overwhelmed!
@feelinghelplesstoday I would have loved that! Unless you're in Scotland

Oh, and use the PNP app to send a video message to your dc from Santa! It’s amazing!

Oh, and we choose our tree from a tree farm: they last all December and beyond

Father Christmas brings the stocking only in our house, and that is generally filled with little bits and pieces. It means they can't ask for high value items we don't want them to have.

We've always left out whisky and mince pies for Father Christmas (aka me...) and carrots. We have presents under the tree from us and whoever, but leave the source of stockings a mystery, with 'people say Santa comes down the chimney and fills them...' but not confirming or denying. Put a toy in the stocking that might keep ds busy until lunch, but open another if he gets antsy. We go for a walk after lunch then open more presents and have tea and pudding, then watch TV.

Food - do the bits you like, but ignore sprouts or Christmas cake if no one likes them. Do flambé a Christmas pud though. Kids often prefer a Yule Log. Personally I end up buying these as they're as good as I could make, but make my own mince pies.

A panto is great fun - local cheap ones are often better than the ones with celebs. Look at Christmas lights, make decorations, decorate a tree, donate presents to collections for kids who might not have any otherwise. Play charades and board games. Watch TV specials. Invite friends over some days.
Basically, enjoy your small family and your friends.

NORAD to track Santa on Christmas Eve is a must. Stockings filled with chocolate and fun small gifts from Santa. Baking stuff you do not normally eat. Advent calendar, in our house we have a fabric one that the elves fill each night for the next day. Watch films, eat chocolate. Christmas lights go up 1st December and the tree the weekend before. Visit Santa and a Christmas market to get into the festive mood. Most of all enjoy!!!

@CrazyPineapple I am a Scot but sadly living in the South East 😢.
I'll be making my Christmas cake this weekend. A little later than usual but been decorating.
I feel so excited for you. I completely understand that everyone is wholly entitled to their own beliefs but for me it's just such a magical time of year x

Thank you all. I am jotting down all the suggestions! Feeling more excited this year