Have I gone overboard for three year old?

[yestwoplease]

I have got DD (3) too much already I think the list is as follows:

Unicorn race track thing off eBay
Fire station toy (it's very small, not a massive playset)
Duplo night train
Parrot teddy (sequin one)
Happyland space rocket (second hand)
All of the Paw Patrol sea vehicles (6- each dog + vehicle)
Paw Patrol umbrella
Masha doll (from Masha and the bear)
Paw Patrol Pirate ship

So tempted to also get:
Scooby Doo mystery machine + figures
Melissa and Doug Vet set
Dinosaur book
Dinosaur figures

All of the branded things are from programmes she enjoys eg scooby doo and paw patrol but I don't know if this is too much and if she'll be overwhelmed or if it's normal? She'll have a few gifts from grandparents too.

Do you really think it will grow, @FrancisCrawford ? 😩 I was thinking of getting clothes but that's a need rather than gifts iyswim

I think it is a lot. But I have a huge family and DS gets a lot at Christmas. We are going to do one big present from us, bike this year I think, and a stocking and I am going to try to keep it to that. He was 18 months last Christmas and was still opening presents in January. Not a stealth brag, he was just over whelmed and eventually not interested in opening presents. Maybe think about how many other presents she is likely to get?

I wouldn’t buy anymore she will get presents from other people and they do get overwhelmed with too much stuff.
If she needs clothes then just give them to her as normal they don’t need to be a present as she’s got lots of lovely things to open already.

Last Christmas I had a three year old and we knew she’d get loads of stuff because her birthday is two weeks before Christmas. I was pleading with everyone not to buy loads of things, and to get her books which she LOVES and which are easier to store than toys. Of course people still got her toys, and I just had nowhere to put everything. We asked her what she wanted for her birthday and got her one thing she asked for and the rest was books clothes and art supplies. We also gave her one present at a time on Christmas Day because I think it’s too overwhelming otherwise. She was opening bits and bobs until new year in the end.

Yay lots of plastic purchased there 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 well done!

Why? Why have you got so much stuff? She's going to be so overwhelmed and it sets a precedent for huge piles off junk every birthday and Christmas.
She also won't cherish any of it. Too much at once.

Don't buy anything else.

That looks like a lot to me. I’d also be concerned that her favourite shows and characters may be completely different by Christmas. Is there a reason why you’re shopping for Christmas in August?

I think you’ve gone a bit early too. And a bit plastic.

With this kind of list, I’m tempted to ask you what else is going on in your life (or hers)? Are you perhaps trying to compensate for something?

I guess these days I’d also ask ‘Is it really for her happiness, or to make a show to others (Insta or otherwise)?’

I mean, you know she just really wants some time with you, and prolly a small reindeer cupcake, right?

I say this with love, and as someone who threw a huge ‘mermaids & pirates’ party for my 3yo. I imported custom sugar decorations at great expense from across the world, for a huge beautiful sandcastle cake. I’m talking translucent sea glass shards, and perfect replica edible seashells. There were entertainers, and bespoke fabric pirate hats with names to take home. Soon afterwards I got therapy. Turns out going overboard for birthdays & Christmas can be a sign of lots of things, none of which is ‘healthy love for a 3yo’.

So just be careful it isn’t more about you (or some ‘family of origin’ shit you should leave behind you). xx

I don’t think the plastic part is relevant. One set is second hand. Most people sell toys or give them to friends once a child grows out of them. I’m happy to buy plastic toys second hand as they are easy to clean. I gave all my babies plastic toys to my friend and she passes things on as well. It’s more the plastic magazine/happy meal/party toys that are an issue as they always end up in the bin

Wow. Yes, I think you've gone overboard.

Also, it's only August. How do you know she will still like those things by Christmas?

That is more than my son will get from everyone. It's pretty obscene to get a child that much stuff. They won't appreciate it.

Take it back and spend the money on activities you can enjoy together.

I ask people to get books and clothes. He inevitably gets a few toys.

That’s insane. Dd has one ‘big’ present from me (play kitchen, doll, wheely bug etc) and then clothes, books, hair things and other little stocking fillers.

Why do you feel the need to buy so much crap? It’s doesn't mean you love them any more you know.

Way too much. Maybe give some to charity? Your child will not appreciate all that. Kids just need a few presents , a fun day and some love at Christmas.

She'll be over half those things by Christmas. Bit daft.

My twins used to get totally overwhelmed by too many gifts! I'd give half of that stuff and keep the rest for random treats throughout the year and maybe her birthday

It is plenty. I also agree that at this age you have to wait until close to Christmas to buy as their tastes change so much. Three months ago DS was obsessed with Paw Patrol. Now it is Octonauts.

It's a big list. I would have waited until a bit closer to the time to see what she's really into by December.

What about some books or games though? My son loves the games by Orchard. But if you've already bought all that, rather than just earmarked it all, then I wouldn't buy any more!

As you have already bought the toys then why wait until xmas to give them to her? If she is intao Paw Patrol now and would get pleasure from playing with the toys then just let her play with them! That's the point of toys isn't it. As other's have said she may be into something completely different by Xmas.
It is also a lot. She doesn't need that much and it's better to get toys that go together (ie several Paw Patrol bits) rather than various random bits. Look at that list and decide what she would really love playing with now. Let her play with it now and enjoy this moment in time and take the rest back or sell. Then start again in November.

You’re getting a bit of a rough time here- you’ve maybe over bought slightly, but it’s not like you’ve bought half the Smyth’s catalogue.

I try and stick to the Something they want, Something they need, Something to wear and Something to read mantra for birthdays and Christmas because I find it very easy to go a bit mad present wise. It really makes me reign it in.

Good mantra! Might steal that :)

I wouldn't buy anything else except clothes. I think you might have gone a little overboard and your DD won't know what to play with first

Thanks all.

I've managed to cancel the doll and the pirate paw patrol ship, I'll donate the fire toy as it's probably just another 'filler' if you see what I mean, she'd most likely have no interest in it. I actually really like the parrot so I may keep that one for myself 😅 (it's a sequin Keel one) as again, I don't think she'd really care for it. Undecided if I'll give her the other paw patrol toys now or at Christmas. Will keep the rocket as it's second hand and I'm pretty confident she'll use it. I bought the train on a whim, I might try and integrate it into Christmas Eve (it's a night train? I'm sure I could make something up 😂), but it was bought on eBay from a seller that doesn't accept returns. I'll see what she's into nearer the time, I'm leaning more towards things like her own blanket/dressing gown/pillow now

I work full time and have a deep 'mum guilt) as she cries everyday when I go I want her to have a magical time but I know it's more to do with having a nice day and attention as opposed to what's under the tree.

It’s August. She’s 3. She might have completely different tastes by December.

Also, yes. You run the risk of massively overwhelming her. Less is more. Honestly.

I think the first list is a reasonable haul for a kid without other relatives buying for them. A bit overboard if they can expect a lot of stuff from aunties, grannies etc..

There's no need to get more and I'd also be a bit concerned about tastes changing.

Good shout on the Happyland Rocket though. I got that as a "big brother present for my two year old. He and his "baby" sister still play with it now at age 7 and 4.