Present idea for DS4 who likes "girly" things

[firefire]

He shows very little interest in his Lego etc. Loves playing with my nieces dolls, unicorns, ponies etc etc.

I don't want to buy him a toy blatantly aimed at girls cause he'll just nag for more. But I do want him to love his present if that makes sense.

Any suggestions please?

Mumtoboy We have done the Christmas list. All he wants is playdoh! I asked him if there was anything else at all but no. I'd just stick to that but his pile would be tiny next to his brothers

I agree with build a bear now I've researched it. The fun is in going to the shop I think.

That play mobil house looks good though. He might like that even though it's adding to our plastic stuff 😫

I don't know what your problem is or where you live Unicycle but every shop I go in has toys that are aimed at girls or boys. As does every tv advert. He sees these, I don't need to reinforce them!

If that was the case I would have an issue with him playing with my nieces stuff. I've made it clear I don't.

How about one of the Lego sets marketed at girls? It would have the colours and things that he likes, but can be played with alongside his other Lego.

Gender stereotypes. That is the problem. And it does not matter where I live, I managed to bring a male child and a female child up without these rigid ideas. It all starts at home.

*Rejecting these ideas starts at home

www.amazon.co.uk/LEGO-41126-Friends-Heartlake-Riding/dp/B01AC19ZXO/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=Lego+stable&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&qid=1541576073&sr=8-1 this kind of thing

I don't work for them or own them, but I've found a lot of kids' presents on Wicked Uncle that have been very well received. If you buy into gender stereotypes you can search by 'boy' or 'girl', and if you don't, you can search by 'all' (most of the stock seems to appear in both anyway...)

So by not having the slightest issue with him playing with dolls etc, buying him toys he wanted that included tea sets etc. I'm reinforcing gender stereotypes?

The kid doesn't want a doll. That's all I've said. And I know that cause I've just asked him.

You might have all day to walk round pointing out that every advert, piece of packaging aimed at one gender or another is wrong but I don't.

Deffo might get some Lego friends stuff though.

My dd is the same age. I gave her some toy catalogues, scissors and glue stick. I gave her a big piece of paper and wrote Christmas List at the top. She cut out pictures of toys she liked and wanted for Christmas then glued them on the paper. She loved that activity and shows people her Christmas list poster.

I do understand what you mean about girls toys and boys toys in that some toys are clearly marketed at a particular gender, but you do actually say yourself in your first post that you don’t want to buy him a toy aimed at a girl because then he’ll want more toys aimed at girls, which to me suggests that you think there’s something wrong with that...

I don’t really see how you can get snippy with certain PPs for their comments suggesting you’ve got issues with him owning a ‘girls toy’ when you say that in your opening post.

Smiggle have some of those sequin notebooks that reverse, in bright but gender neutral colours.

DS is the same, very into things that are usually perceived as 'girls' toys. He is a magpie and loves sparkly things and bright colours so I've been thinking about getting him a shimeez. He played with a sequin cushion at a friend's house for about an hour last month so I think he would like it. Be spent ages tracing letters into the sequins. Unfortunately it is plastic but everything else we're getting him is wooden/recycled etc and he has a sister who I'm hoping will play with it afterwards so not total landfill fodder. Hopefully.

Just by chance we don’t watch kids tv with adverts (use Netflix, amazon and iplayer) and I think it really helps kids not have such rigid ideas about toys and gender.

Does he enjoy craft. At that age I made my kid home made craft kit.
I just filled a large tub with all sorts of crafty bits. You could add animal stickers and monster masks as well as glitter and flowers.

@firefire i feel like some people are being a bit harsh to you here. You know him best..sounds like its not about gender steriotypes but the fact he doesnt actually want a doll! Do they still make those play doh kits where you put the person bit over thr playdoh to make it look like hair then have the scissors to cut the hair (im thinking back like 15 years here so maybe not) i loved those. If he likes stuffed animals get him a big bear or something. Playmobile/lego people types things are a good idea. If he likes the dolls it maybe the people element of the dolls which would make playmobile a good idea. I remember i had an animal hospital set that i loved when i was a kid.
My point: get the kid what he wants.. enjoy watching him open it and play with it and fully ignore the people who have jumped on a gender bandwagon here and not actually answered the question!

@firefire Playmobil is excellent quality plastic stuff though! I believe it has a good second hand resale value too.

Agree with last post about looking a making a crafty kit too, lots of great materials in B&M and Hobbycraft.

Oh, Aldi are doing make a home 'build a bear' type kit this Sunday. Choice of 4 animals and you add the heart, stuff and sew yourself.

Bella I get what you are saying about my first post. I just meant if I get him one of those bloody LOL dolls (which is what my niece has) he'll want them all! But as I've said, I worded it wrongly.

If he wanted a normal doll I'd get him one. He doesn't.

Thanks @Mumtoboy123 you seem to get what I'm trying to say. Helpful suggestions! He's got the hairdressing playdoh, they still do them! 😁

My ds had a double for buggy for his babies Buzz lightyear and woody. He also had a doll called Kelly but she didn't like the pram?? My oldest ds had an ariel doll that sang.. He was obsessed with it.

They are both teenagers now but I loved it when they just played with toys and loved life.

Thanks for the aldi suggestion. That sounds better and cheaper than actual build a bear. Maybe save that idea for his bday outing

I've also just asked him if he'd like a unicorn. He doesn't! Seems he loves sparkles and colour but not dolls or unicorns

@firefire also if youre concerned about that amount of plastic/influx of new toys, get him to choose some he no longer plays with and put them in the shoe boxes which get sent to less fortunate children. Or get him to package them up for the same reason and drop them at a charity shop. Might work, might not, but worth a short.. lord only knows where im going to keep the year on year toys for my son in the future if we dont do this from the start! Good luck... and remember to stop for a coffee whike xmas shopping... youre clearly putting a lot of thought and effort into this for him

Second playmobil - my mum still has ours from when we were kids and dd loves it. It’ll last years (we played with it until 10+) or be re-sold easily. I’m waiting until youndest won’t eat it then we’ll be investing! House/swimming pool/bin lorry seem to be popular!

My son isn't keen on typically 'boy' toys he likes squishies, also loves playing schools with soft toy characters like Charlie and Lola and was just getting into hama beads at that age. He also much prefers Lego friends to other Lego - they do now have a boy character called Oliver I think?!
Dh has always been really freaked about him playing with toys marketed at girls - dolls etc (he hid every doll in the house at one point- older sisters) so we have had to find a compromise after all the nerf guns, Star Wars stuff went unplayed with.
Things like playmobil are always good for unisex toys

I wrote before... and I guess my boys wouldn't have thought like this when they were 4 because they did lead pretty protected lives, no TV, fairly gender neutral preschool, and parents who were pretty aware of not buying into stereotypes. I am sorry I was a bit snarky pointing this out to you, but I just thought that your assumptions about what 4-year-olds think bothered me, as I don't think it is inevitable.

In my experience, kids don't usually know what they want for Christmas, or rather, they don't know what they will actually continue to enjoy playing with after Christmas is over. If you have seen your son enjoying his cousin's dolls, unicorns and ponies, I would probably get him a bunch of similar toys to play with. These toys are fun because you can do some great imaginative play with them, so I would probably get a whole lot of them second hand, along with some second hand props for them so he can create a little imaginative world out of them.

None of my 3 kids liked lego, by the way, so your son is not alone in that.

Thanks Clara, I get what you mean. They do, unfortunately, see the tv ads etc. Even the Smyths catalogue is very boy/girl.

The plastic tat we are gathering definitely needs to be given to less fortunate children as it's in good condition and some is rarely played with now. My eldest son is the biggest culprit, he can't resist the big plastic toys. He's very easy to buy for though as he knows exactly what he wants. His list is neatly ordered and numbered in preference!