DH can't follow the simplest instructions and has ruined Christmas!

[elfontheshelfstolemychristmas]

He touched the elf! He bloody well touch the fricken elf! Right in front of the dc!
So now when the dc woke this morning I was asked if I'd moved him as he can't as he hasn't any magic cos daddy touched him.
Bloody men!
So tonight mr elf is off to elf hospital in the hope Father Christmas can restore his magic and make dc believe again before they start to question santa before Christmas

(Btw I do know Christmas is not really---- ruined I am completely over exaggerating that so don't flame me for it. I do have a sense of humour)

I feel so sorry for your DH. {shock]

Elf on the Shelf :A Christmas Tradition isn't a MN Thing , I saw them on QVC USA eons ago.

Your Elf has to go to the toilet tonight and pee all the badness out - you do know they do green wee? (Drop of food colour in the loo water will do it) you don't want to have green limescale for ever more .

I wouldn't be letting your DH cook Christmas Dinner though (in case he rollox that up) , banish him to peeling duties and putting the bins out .

Can't you just say "don't worry kids, daddy got a letter from Father Christmas to say he is allowed to touch the elf and it won't ruin the magic"...once you start these ridiculous stories you may as well keep spinning them..

Ooh and I made my own (skinflint) Elf, one year was a Dr Who doll (Christopher Eccleson incarnation) the next an A-Team Doll (the Liam Neeson one)
I had to wrestle the guns out of his grabby little elf hands, ain't no-one would've touched him during the night.
My Elf was Bad!

Maybe daddy gets something magic happen to him as a result of touching the elf??? Green toenails or something? As a warning from the big elves?

Stab him in the neck over night and tell the kids that the elf did it.

Then you can get on and enjoy the magic of Christmas without him wrecking it.

This makes me happier than ever that we never did the Father Christmas myth. What a load of ridiculous.

Christmas Eve hampers? I seem to have missed this one, can someone explain so I can add it to my list* of stuff that raises my eyebrows.

• elves,Christmas pyjamas, Christmas jumpers, Christmas bedding......

Maybe your DH won't get any presents now, because he broke the Elf Rules.

The whole thing is so creepy, though. I like this take on it:

The only thing I can't work out is, are the adults allowed to put the elf back on the shelf when he is discovered to be wherever he is?

Oh my word, how can anyone be bothered with this made up nonsense? Though I live in The Netherlands so tonight my kids will be putting shoes out so a racist caricature who's travelled on a steamboat from Spain can fill it with tiny spice biscuits. Which I suppose makes the elf seem ok.

Read Enid Blyton, watch Toy Story. Everyone knows toys come alive at night or when we are not there. I don't know anything about not touching them...whatever it is, can you not alter the belief to this?

we have an elf too, Mickey Baubles. It was OK when DC were younger and acted as a good incentive to good behaviour but now they're getting wise and pull me up on Elf etiquette it is all feeling a bit much.

We had to bend the rules to allow adults to touch Mickey Baubles after the year the dog ran off with him and he had to be wrestled from the doggy jaws of death. I was also extremely grateful last year when a friend of DS2 picked up Mickey Baubles (DC had conniptions and said child has not been to play since!) and I was given a reprieve from moving the ruddy thing for a few nights "third night without moving? Wow, Oliver REALLY zapped his powers, didn't he?"

Sixth

Half my FB has them I couldn't personally be arsed I'm a shit mam but each to their own

Use BBQ tongs to pick him up, put him in the fridge to restore his magic

Poor DH

I think you need to relax a little if you don't want to get so het up about the tiniest little things. This has not ruined Christmas; how you react to the situation is the indicator as to how Christmas will fare.

You just need to calm down about the elf just stopit

Urgh, I hate the Elf. Won't have one but I do actually know someone in RL who has one.

However, OP, I do sympathise - it's Ds1's birthday tomorrow and we're going to the big zoo - I'd managed to get away with not telling him right up until DH opened his fat mouth and said "So when was the last time we went to X zoo then?" Which of course immediately gave the game away. Apparently my not mentioning it at all to Ds1 and Ds1 not saying anything about it was insufficient for DH to have realised that perhaps, just per-fucking-haps, I hadn't told him and was going to surprise him with it? But even if I HAD told him it was a surprise, he has no filter anyway, so he would almost certainly STILL have said something crass and spoilt the surprise.

JoMalones your comment has made me go giddy from laughter!

This is the maddest thread in a while

At least you didn't leave him alone with the gremlin, he'd only have given it a bath and fed it a midnight feast!

We have a mum at our kids school. She is That mum, kids do every extra activity, and win, every play they are lead roles, she's pta queen, best friends with the teacher, etc etc. Likes to look down her nose at the poor people ( anyone without a brand new Audi/BMW) you get the picture!

Well she is making and selling elf on a shelfs and other Christmas home made shite, well I say make, I think she buys a hundred at a time from china puts them in a fancy box with some tinsel on.

Anyway, she's been doing this a few years now. Someone has grassed her up to the tax man and she now is in trouble for not declaring! Bahaha Amazingly hilarious news to the vast majority of parents in the yard. Couldn't think of a nicer person to have that happen to them.

So if your DH touched the Elf, and the Elf is now unmusical, does that mean that your DH has sucked the magic out of the Elf into his hand?

Will he have a Magic Finger like in the Roald Dahl book?

Bloody glad we don't have an Elf as we'd probably have Magic Cats flying all over or something.