Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Original poster

***********************An important question regarding the Christmas appeal from SOAPBOX*********************************

100 replies

andaSOAPBOXinapeartree · 17/12/2006 20:48

I need to get peoples views on how to distribute the mountain of stuff I have received for the Christmas appeal!

Thanks to a marvellous response from several sponsors I have got loads of things here that need to be distributed for the Christmas appeal - in reality probably much more than would pass the boundaries of good taste!

Can I get your collective views as to whether I should just package the lot up and send them out, or whether MN would prefer me to hold on to some of what are quite substantial gifts for distribution during the year to those having a difficult time?

I could keep the gifts and distribute when a child is sick or when relationships break down or when birthdays come round and there is no means to pay for a gift - those kind of times when it would be nice to send a little something to the children.

I'm happy either way - so over to you to let me know which you think would be best

OP posts:
FLAMEinEckItsYuleAgain · 17/12/2006 22:50

Thankyou!

You can understand the worry though - its an awkward situation to be in (especially where it all spiralled so much... the amount of times I had to convince DH that I signed up for some secondhand toys, and that I hadn't told everyone he'd left me for a 18 yr old and was paying no maintenance!!), I have been paranoid the entire time that people might think we were "unworthy"

colditz · 17/12/2006 22:50
Grin
munz · 18/12/2006 08:01

phew nor me either, I was worie4d last night as well! lol. with the help for J we were able to afford £2.50 for each of our 6 GP's hence the brute bottle.

surely no one would actually take advantage thou away from those deserving families/children who really needed it.

StarrmumofRoyalBeautyBright · 18/12/2006 08:12

Sending stuff out through the year is a lovely idea, but Soapy this means you've taken on a 'job for life'. Are you sure you really want to do this?

Would be delighted to help out with postage/stamps as others have said, if this what you decide to do. Actually, how have you been funding stuff so far? You must already be out of pocket? Can we send you a contribution now?

sockmonkey · 18/12/2006 08:13

Soapbox - again with the fantastic ideas! Thank you so much for your help. Sending stuff out through the year is a wonderful idea.
When I asked for help, I only imagined getting a couple pre-loved toys for my DSs, and your lovely givers have been soooo generous.

JARMgotstuckupthechimney · 18/12/2006 08:16

I agree Soapy, its a fab idea.

Those who have recieved this year have been so thankful and so amazed at the generosity. We sure weren't expecting the masses!

Sending through the year is a lovely idea, so maybe you should keep hold of them, however I agree with a previous poster that anything perishable should be sent out soon to avoid wastage!

When things settle down here, I would be happy to send a few pounds to help with the postage costs xxx

HeavenisInherwinterunderwear · 18/12/2006 08:26

I think it's a good idea about all year.
I would be happy to send you a few cards and stamps.
If I can help in anyway (don't know what) just let me know.

fortyplus · 18/12/2006 08:55

Our local Salvation Army collects gifts for distribution to needy families at Christmas. Or maybe Social Services could point you in the right direction? I think most MNers would be very happy to leave it to your judgement - you've done such a fantastic job already xx

tjacksonpfc · 18/12/2006 10:14

as a very grateful reciever i would like to give something back if anyone is interested in having meturn any pictures they have into cross stitch then please let me no and i will do it for you i no its not much compared to the generosity that has been shown towards mme and my 2 dc bt it is something a bit more personal or if you want i could make an mn one

yulemoonfiend · 18/12/2006 10:31

agree with the others re all year round, if you are ok with that. Agree also about worrying about your costs. Like the £1 on a postcard idea?

welshmumwithsparklybits · 18/12/2006 11:08

Yep, like the idea of the year round gifts available to those who need cheering up, woudl like to help with postage costs too.
Thanks so much for sorting this out soapy, have a lovely Christmas

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 18/12/2006 11:10

god yes, send throughout the year to people who need it. we are overwhelamed with gifts from mn-ers, not sure we could cope with anymore (in a good way lol).

robinpud · 18/12/2006 11:10

I think what you have done Soapy is wonderful.
However I think it might be better to pass onto a charity what you have accumulated. I think the doling out throughout the year might actually prove more onerous and troublesome than anticipated. Giving it to a charity who can use it now, or relatively soon means that there is some closure for you and a general sense of a job well done. Those who have given will feel comfortable that it has gone to a good home; those who feel overwhelmed by what they have received will gain pleasure from knowing that others have benfitted as well.
Come next year, if there is the impetus to repeat the procdure then it can surely happen again. I worry that deciding who deserves what and when and how to get it to them might actually be too much of a burden for you, Soapy.
Sorry it's long and it's a lone voice but still wanted to say it anyway.

FLAMEinEckItsYuleAgain · 18/12/2006 11:13

Isn't this stuff from the companies that donated though? How would they feel about the stuff they have given to a specific cause being passed on to another charity?

BingCrosby · 18/12/2006 11:25

I think it should be used for MNers, simply because that was the reason it was sent for.

There are so many charities out there - how do you begin to decide which is the right one?

I have been on the receiving end of enormous generosity this year - I'd like my fellow MNers to be on the receiving end of the same at a low point. When I can - I hope to be able to donate towards some postage costs and hopefully some more items for the "reserve".

bossykate · 18/12/2006 11:27

robinpud, you are not a lone voice! i agree with you - much better to give to registered charities now imho.

batters · 18/12/2006 11:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UCM · 18/12/2006 11:44

I agree about the burden on Soapy to be honest. It was huge and I expect it will get bigger next year and I can see the sense in turning it over to a charity.

BUT what I loved about this is that if someone gave a pound, the whole pound went to someone who needed it, not 10% of it and the rest on admin.

JARMgotstuckupthechimney · 18/12/2006 12:04

Im sorry, but I disagree with giving to charity

As someone has said, these gifts have been given for MNers. How would the likes of GLTC feel if it was then given to another charity. Would they not have done that in the first place?!

I honestly feel these gifts should be kept and passed on to mumsnetters during the year ahead.

I think everyone, especially us recievers, will assist with postage costs for dishing out.

Just my opinion of course.

mumofmonstersNotActuallyHere · 18/12/2006 12:13

I think that the charity idea is a no no. the companies gave their gifts for MNetters niot salvation army etc also, whilst i think hanging on and donating thru the year is a good idea again, those companies gave their gifts for christmas rather than thru-out the year. I am sure that if a MNEtter was in dire need then enough of us could whip round and do a tesco shop and send some 2nd hand clothes/toys/a few pounds

i am aware i stand alone in the give it now side but hope i have explained clearly enough!

CliffRichardSucksEggsinHell · 18/12/2006 12:15

Just a thought, but I hear Aloha could do with a little cheering up.

CliffRichardSucksEggsinHell · 18/12/2006 12:17

I do agree with the thought too, that this is just too much to expect of Soapy.

I don't know what you can do with it, but to organise this year round, with Mumsnet getting ever bigger, could take up far too much of your time.

kickassangel · 18/12/2006 12:25

i agree with most - would be nice to do this year round, but veryhard to co-ordinate! anyway that mnhq could help, e.g. let us know if people have been here for a while?
also willing to help out with the cost of postage, and always willing to contribute cards to send a message to anybody who needs cheering up.
I don't think i'm anywhere near you, soapy (i'm cambs), but i'm willing to send you some cards & a donation to help with posting things out. not much help, i know. if you were close i'd come & give a hand with wrapping.

robinpud · 18/12/2006 12:28

I agree companies gave their donations knowing that it was for mumsnetters; however this Christmas gifts have gone only to "known" posters. It has all gone incrdibly well and generated a wonderful sense of belonging and sharing.
I have the horrible feeling that deciding who is worthy of future donations has the potential to get messy as FairyTale pointed out right at the beginning of the thread.
Whilst the companies are happy to dontae the stuff now, I think they would rather that itgoes to deserving causes now rather than becomes the subject of disagreements later in the year.
In terms of losing the full value of the gift in admin, I have friends who drive a lorry every 3 months to a children's home in Romania which they fund themselves. a small children's charity here could benefit enormously and I am sure the companies would not be averse to a little publicity.

Blu · 18/12/2006 12:37

Weren't the gifts given to 'Mumsnet' as much as to 'Musnetters'?

I think the Christmas initiative has been wonderful, but I do see problems in setting MN up as an ongoing mini-welfare support system, as opposed to responding spontaneously to events which strike known individuals.

Can you imagine: a stock of resources which people' apply to' - either by asking or by nomination, who decides, what if the answer is 'no, that doesn't count as a difficulty' or it all gets used up and then the next person is distressed that they were in need but couldn't be helped?

I think the 'as and when' generous response of Mn-ers to calamities is fantastic - but setting up a system is more like MN becoming a charity that a message board.

And sadly, a few people would join to take advantage. A few people would feel resentful that thery weren't nominated for help after posting of problems -which could be very divisive.

Making decisions is a huge and onerous responsibility.

I say - the remaining goods were sent to Mumsnet, and that as Mumsnetters we often advise women to contact Women's Aid or refuges. I know someone who works in a refuge, and she says so many women arrive in the clothes that they stand up in and have not a thread or a toy for thier children.

Let's help women and children by donating to a womens refuge network.