Am I overreacting? 13mo with repeated fevers!

[leelums]

Writing this message as my dd is poorly again with a slight cough, runny nose and fever. Went to the GP for a check over and they didn’t seem too concerned, despite telling them that she literally presented the same symptoms just 10-14 days ago. The previous time she had a fever lasting over 7 days and we ended up putting her on a course of antibiotics as we wondered whether it was bacterial — ear infection or similar.

It has been constant with illnesses since early December and I’m really struggling with it all, despite having a very supportive partner. We hear repeatedly it’s “common” for toddlers to be unwell often, but I swear this wasn’t the norm when I was that age, or my siblings’, or parents’ generations.

Is anyone else experiencing this and what advice can you give? She eats very well (all home cooked fresh food — plenty of healthy fats, protein and veg). We also give her D3 — knowing this helps immunity.

It’s so tough when you’re having to juggle being a parent, as well as managing a job, house, etc, as well as my own health and wellbeing (am also getting sick every month or so) and it’s starting to take its toll mentally and physically.

I just feel like we are the only ones going through this. Even her nursery class (she goes 2x per week) only seem to have simple snotty noses. Nothing as bad as what she’s experiencing.

My little lad was the same. First year at nursery was really bad. He was always ill. I think some kids are just unlucky and you just have to ride it out but it is really hard. Will eventually get better xx

Thanks for your comment. Did you do anything or is it just one of those things? Hoping when spring and summer arrive that will help. I also hope that come next winter season she’ll have stronger immunity against similar viruses etc?

no not really just muddled through the first year, second year was better but still more illnesses that other kids his age but just one of those things. Just done his 3rd winter at nursery and been loads better it’s like he has actually got an immune system now 🤣🤣🤣

Did the doctor not check her ears before prescribing antibiotics 'in case' of an ear infection?

Has anyone checked that she hasn't been shoving small objects up her nose? Peas? Diced carrots? Little pieces of play dough?

Does she ever chew her shoes?

It’s common and has always been common, but there seems to have been a step change in recent years.

It’s normal. You are unlikely to remember what you were like at that age, but also consider there are less kids staying at home til school and more in nursery etc, so more germs to share.

When you say you ended to putting her on a course of antibiotics because you were worried it was bacterial - was that a doctor who prescribed the antibiotics or did you get hold of them because it was your concern rather than a drs concern?

12-15 coughs and colds per year is normal between 1 and 2, unfortunately, especially during the first year at nursery.

If one of her infections was covid, then it may have dysregulated her immune system. There is clear evidence covid is bad for your immune system, leaving you more likely to catch bacterial, viral and fungal infections.

If she's in nursery make sure the nursery is employing airborne mitigations, not just surface cleaning. They need to open windows, run air purifiers, keep sick kids off. Most viruses are airborne (breathed out by infected people, inhaled by others) so cleaning surfaces is insufficient. You need to clean the air.

Check out https://www.bing.com/ck/a?!&&p=9527ca41bfd58737f79f002afefe26c1b98783bc832175405b0359b3c07ef61aJmltdHM9MTc3MjQ5NjAwMA&ptn=3&ver=2&hsh=4&fclid=2b9b72aa-2d11-6022-137b-60702cba6171&psq=covidsafetyin+schools&u=a1aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuY292aWRzYWZldHlmb3JzY2hvb2xzLm9yZy8 and share this with the nursery managment.

www.covidsafetyforschools.org sorry link above no good

I understand your stress, but this : We hear repeatedly it’s “common” for toddlers to be unwell often, but I swear this wasn’t the norm when I was that age, or my siblings’, or parents’ generations is incorrect - some children in every year group since the dawn of time have had clusters of viruses resulting in high temperatures.

It sounds like you're worried there is something underlying, but doctors are not incorrect to say it is common for young children to have a bad run of viruses.

If you are also getting sick at the same time, that would point to viruses.

Do you have any specific concerns that you could take to the doctor, about what you think might be going on other than a bad run of viruses?

In the first six months of mine being in nursery, he had hand, foot and mouth twice, conjunctivitis twice, a stomach bug, a chest infection that needed antibiotics and multiple random fevers and colds. Then seemed to die down due to summer.
Had multiple illnesses since December again. Hoping will die down again.
They're so little with immune systems building. Happens to every little one.

My daughter was the same, also in nursery 2 days a week and that first year was brutal. She caught every virus going, chicken pox, hand foot and mouth, colds, sickness bugs, even a serious bacterial infection but she bounced back and this past year has hardly been unwell at all and when she is it’s mild. It will get better but wow it’s tough!

Good point - there’s often a lot of focus on we wiped a table or whatever, whilst ignoring ventilation and air cleaners. Children put things in mouths etc, but they’re all breathing the same air. We also downplay covid’s impact on children and the impact of having multiple viruses at once.

forgot to quote your post @AussieManque

In the first few months of nursery, DS missed more than he went. And then for a while we had one week on, one week off. It’s a hotbed of germs at nursery!

But gradually, the illnesses were less and less and life got a lot easier. It does get easier!

Frequent illness is common in toddlers, especially in nursery, because their immune system is still developing. Keep giving healthy food and vitamin D, and see the GP if fever lasts many days.

It's so hard when they seem to always be ill but unfortunately the doctor is right it is normal, although some kids do seem to get more than others. My youngest started nursery in September and it has been constant, hand foot and mouth, random viruses, fevers, two sickness bugs, conjunctivitis and just getting over bacterial tonsillitis now. Im exhausted!!! Hes been there 6 months and whilst he's still getting bugs they are starting to become less frequent and he is getting over things a little quicker and easier. My daughter wasnt like this at all but she started just in 2021 so after covid, I do think there is something in the nurseries hygeine standards and just in general people being less willing to stay home when ill. It is so draining but like you say hopefully the weather will start to improve now and things will calm down a bit.

It’s hard but it will pass OP. Like everyone else has said, my son had everything going in his first year at nursery including the nasties like hand, foot and mouth, impetigo, conjunctivitis, chicken pox, slapped cheek, D&V, constant colds, coughs and a nasty chest infection turning into pneumonia which needed a hospital admission. It feels never ending but it does get better.

My DD was like this for the first 6 months of nursery. By the time she got to her 2nd winter at nursery she’d built up enough antibodies that we got through it with only a couple of illnesses that caused fevers. I think this is really normal.

Aha thanks for the info. So glad that he has improved year on year immunity-wise. This gives me hope!!

Great points! Both recent visits the GPs did check her ears, but they were “too waxy” to be able to give a definitive ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to a suspected ear infection. The last time she was poorly, the GP said that if her fever doesn’t improve by day 7-8 then to start the AB. She did start to improve from day 8-9, but hard to be sure whether it was her body getting over the virus OR whether it WAS an infection and the AB helped.

They didn’t check her nose actually, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen her do any of those things you said. But definitely worth keeping note of and an eye on.

Thanks for your comment. Good to know we are not alone.

Why do you think there has been a steep change though in recent years?

That’s true! My siblings and I didn’t go nursery (mum was a SAHM), so I do think the whole shift in nursery attendance is a strong factor here (but she only goes 2 days a week! Who knows how bad it would be if she did more!)

The previous illness (~2 weeks ago) they prescribed it as a ‘take this if her fever doesn’t go.’ And it didn’t, so we gave it to her. This time around they said the same thing… not to give it straight away, but monitor her and if it continues then give it.

Believe me, I really do not want to be giving her AB just for the sake of it. She has already had 2 courses (one in December and her second in February) and she’s only 13m. Just seems crazy to me.

Gosh that’s a lot isn’t it. Is this a statistic that is well known? From the NHS? X

How high are the temps?
when mine had ear infections or any bacterial infection her temp goes up to 40.
we did get that - ears too waxy and it was ear infection and the drums burst.
if she has glue ear it can keep getting infected.
do you use olbas on a tissue nearby when she has a cold - that reduces the blocked nose.
also i think in our case adenoids and tonsils were likely blocking the tubes