Plagiocephaly guilt at 8 months

[Freshairandfood]

Hi all. My gorgeous 8 month baby girl has plagiocephaly and I'm really struggling with mum guilt. I only realised it at 7 months and have already seen the health visitor, whose response was just 'her hair will grow and cover it'.

A bit of context - we saw a cranial osteopath from about 2 - 5 months, suggested by our midwife when we were having a lot of feeding difficulties early on (and in view of my 4 day labour, ending in c-section). The osteopath noticed our baby's left-side preference and suggested some exercises. As that hadn't been the purpose of going there and as I hadn't noticed much myself (and was getting to grips with being a new mum) I don't think I focused enough on these exercises and then quickly forgot about them and any head issues.

Fast forward to just over a month ago when I was bathing my baby and suddenly realised she had a very flat head on the left side. I honestly hadn't realised before that and can't believe I was so silly. Turns out my husband, who baths her more, did realise but didn't mention it! Anyway, cue much upset from me, which is still coming to me in waves. I feel so awful that I didn't do the exercises early on and that I probably had her in the bouncer and pram too much. Really feel I've let her down.

I'm struggling to know what to do now. I'm going to call my GP tomorrow, not that I expect much from that. I'll keep at the exercises, though she will not keep her head to the right if I do manage to move it in her sleep! I've waffled on long enough but I'd love to know if anyone noticed their baby's flat head so late and managed to do anything about it, other than a helmet (which I've already ruled out).

Lots of people think I'm worrying over nothing but I'm just feeling really sad about it if I'm honest.

Hair might cover it but if she needs glasses it would be harder to get them to fit.

It's not too late. Due to shit advice from health care professionals my daughter didn't get her helmet until older. We had to go private at Harley Street. It worked incredible well and that was even a surprise for the doctor.

You will need her asymmetry measured as a starting point.

DD had plagiocephaly (back of head) at about the same age.

I felt TERRIBLE, the general vibe from medical staff was "you should have picked her up more" - and it took me a lot of time to realise that she was a lovely, happy, cheerful, baby, so much so that she didn't want or need to be picked up all the time, she was very happy in her bouncy chair, yabbering-away, and engaging with people (slowly flattening her head).

We didn't take any corrective action (i.e. no helmet) but we did actively encourage her to spend more time sitting upright, being held, and on her tummy - and her flat head righted itself. Now at 8 years old, she has a perfectly 'normal' head shape.

I do wonder why you've discounted a helmet though - has one been recommended by the medics?

@Alevelnamechange thank you. It's very similar for me - she is such a happy little thing most of the time and always has been so I think that must have affected how much I picked her up. I'm doing it a lot more now. Glad to hear it all worked out for you in the end.

Re the helmet - it's a mixture of cost, worrying about her happiness in it and a certainty my husband would not agree. It hasn't been recommended by any medical professionals, though it doesn't sound like the NHS would do that anyway.

Try not to panic OP, my baby had this and I was told that their skull bones don’t fuse until 18 months so you have time!
we saw a chiropractor for my baby who specialised in children and it made a big difference plus once mobile they aren’t lying on their heads nearly as much so I also focused on that. It did cost a bit of money but completely worth it.
I researched helmets and found very mixed views and ultimately I didn’t feel my baby would like it and my chiropractor said with the exercises it wasn’t necessary

does she still have preference over one side? If so, then I’d go back to the osteopath for treatment.

I think before 1/2 the head shape changes anyway as the skull isn’t all fused? Unless it’s severe?? I probably wouldn’t worry. No one has a perfectly round head!

Also my chiropractor said it was most likely due to how he was positioned in the womb that effected his range of movement and that fit with how uncomfortable I was and how they said he was positioned. It helped with the guilt to know it wasn’t my fault

Are you now doing the exercises again, or waiting to see how things will go? There is a similar thread I shall post if I can find it.

My son developed quite a flat head at the back as a baby. He spent a lot of time in his bouncer because I was paranoid about putting him on the floor because of the dog being all over the carpet! It did even out a bit but still has a little bit of noticeable flatness at the back. Hair does cover it.. we weren't advised to do anything other than holding him in different positions x

My friends daughter had this in 1995 … and it was more of a cosmetic problem.She is now working for formula one for a very successful team,she is their head of social media .So just stop worrying!

My NCT friend’s little girl had a really noticeable flat side. Of all our babies she was the first to sleep through the night, and loved to chill in her pram or bouncer! Once she was up and about it evened out pretty quickly.

Does plagiocephaly truly get better by itself? | Mumsnet

OP, the vast majority of plagiocephaly corrects itself without a helmet or any other specific intervention - even if you had raised it with the GP before now, it's unlikely they would have advised you to do anything. And it's obviously subtle enough not to have raised any alarm bells before now. Be kind to yourself.

@AppropriateAdult thank you so much for that. I know I'm probably beating myself up too much about it, especially when I see her with wet hair. I'll see how we get on and hope it improves a bit, though I know sometimes it may not.

Thanks for all the other responses too - really helpful and good to hear other experiences

@Tbskejue thanks. Yes I think there was an element of womb position for me too, given how long my labour went on without much progress!

@BirthdayRainbow have you done that and/or do you know where you would?

@Pinkelephant66 yes I've wondered about going back. And no, I don't think it's severe, though it would be good to get some clarity on what 'level' it is somewhere

My ds had this caused by torticollis which was womb positioning mainly. He was born just before COVID so we were delayed in treatment but we eventually saw a paediatric physio (privately) who helped us with the torticollis which in turn sorted out the flatness. I would recommend seeing a physio because torticollis impacts spine development too.

@JC03745 thanks for the link. I'm trying the exercises again but some of them she just won't entertain now. Trying to gently move her head to the right is a big no and she pushes back, though she'll move it if I use a toy to draw her eye! She knows her mind already

We did that. We went privately for a helmet as it would never have sorted itself out, what with being an actual problem and not just because babies lie on their back for months.

Asymmetry is measured with something that looks like salad servers or forceps.

My ds hated the exercises, they probably hurt but I knew that it was that or constant hunched neck so I had to just power through. Physio recommended every nappy change doing them and after 2 days he has got used to it.

I seem to remember a friend using a fabric beanie style hat which has a padded roll on the back which encourages the baby to lie on either side of the head. You can buy then online and they are FDA approved.

@BirthdayRainbow ah yes I realise that now from your previous post. Thanks for that

DD had this at same age and I was so scared. Soon as she was fully mobile it gradually corrected itself. Her head is probably still not 100% symmetrical but who's really is? It's really common in chilled babies who like to lie in their bouncers a lot.

Hi OP, my daughter is 12 months old and halfway through her helmet treatment. As a PP said above, the flatness does not necessarily solve itself and, while it is a cosmetic issue, it also affects how bicycle/horse riding helmets fit, which is a safety issue.
We paid privately (the NHS don't offer treatment) and the difference is incredible - her eyes are now the same size and shape for the first time since birth, and her head is a normal shape for the first time since birth (her plagio/brachycephaly were primarily caused by womb positioning and torticollis).
Don't feel guilty - despite what people like to say it's usually caused by womb positoning and not because 'you didn't pick your baby up enough'. Mine would hardly be put down for the first 6 months of her life but still developed a very flat head, as did the son of some friends of ours who also pursued helmet treatment and are so glad they did.
Also, for what it's worth our DD is totally unbothered by her helmet.