To ignore BMI as an indicator of a child being overweight?

[HappyHolidays22]

My DD is 4, 5 in 2 months time. She’s tall for her age and looks older than she is because of this. (Just for context, her dad is 6 ft 5 and I am the shortest female in the family at 5 ft 6… so she doesn’t come from small stock!)

Today we had a letter from some NHS service to say that they have done some measurements in school (with our permission) and that she is overweight. Her height is just over 118cm and weight slightly over 26kg. According to the BMI calculator this puts her over then 90th percentile and therefore overweight…

but my problem is that she looks totally in proportion for her height! Never in a million years would I have thought to say she was overweight…

we eat healthily and encourage DD to eat a range of foods (with varying levels of success as I think is normal for a 4 year old).

my question is - AIBU to ignore this BMI calculator/info from the NHS if I believe my daughter is fine? Or should I be doing something to trim her weight down? (Of course, I’d never ever tell DD this as don’t want her to ever have a complex!)

@Cuppasoupmonster that's really interesting. Exactly what JJ Virgin was saying on her podcast I listened to recently. Kiwi particularly affects her.

Carbs definitely spikes it. Complex carbs (veg) are much better, with protein and maybe a quarter of the plate simple carbs.

My carb and sugar portions were way way off before I started learning about all this.

actually giving a dessert after a meal is better than giving a snack from a blood sugar perspective. also the portion is likely to be smaller.

have a look at the localeisure centre if they have classes for children. or after school classes.

or do something together like junior park run.

Your daughter is heavier by 3kg than my 11 year old daughter. Seriously.

Your child is over weight for her height. Ignore it if you want, but surely you realise that is paramount to neglect and you are aiding your child in becoming obese?

When you explain further I agree @CheeseDreamsTonight

But you said 'fruit' - and if people read the nutritional advice on fruit, it's promoted as a source of fibre, vitamins, antioxidants and has a known effect in preventative health measures.

Various fruits do different things eg for fibre, applies or pears, for antioxidants, berries, for Vit C, oranges. Some fruits are promoted as potentially reducing cancer risks.

Excessively eating anything is not wise; but weight gain in a child will not be caused by their fruit consumption. Any fruit.

And this is the kind of nonsense OP should ignore.

In eating disorder clinics they use weight for height, as it's a better measure for children.

Your DD comes out as 120.45% WFH. It means that her weight is 20.45% higher than the average girl of her height and age. Her ideal body weight would be 21.59kg.

OP, I'm glad it was helpful.

I certainly wouldn't be saying to ignore this letter and I can't tell (nor can any other poster, despite the last idiotic post about 'neglect') whether your DD is overweight.

I certainly think the height is a factor and unlike many here, I think your opinion and instincts matter. Yes, some parents are blind to their DC weight, most are not. It doesn't sound like you are! Most of us know our children well.

My DC are all healthy, sporty, no weight issues - but as they have got to teen / preteen years, would opt for a carb-heavy, low fruit diet, especially the boys, if they could. The fruit that used to vanish when they were small, was left sitting there. So without any issues around weight, from a dietary perspective, I had to address it, with certain rules around eating fruit / veg / salad, and adapting our practices to incorporate this more easily. So they do eat cereal for breakfast, which they didn't as smaller children; I'm under no illusion a bowl of cereal is very nutritional or filling so they also have to have fruit / berries with it or some yogurt, wholemeal bread + banana etc. so overall, all good.

The utter nonsense spouted about some food choices here, like it's devil's food, is crazy. It's about balance, preference & overall lifestyle (my kids play sports 7 days a week, and ensuring they have sufficient carbs & protein is important).

And like every family, I have odd rules that maybe others don't eg I absolutely hate fizzy drinks & we never have them; I'm not a fan of crisps & will almost never buy them either. Obviously there's nothing inherently wrong with either in moderation but I just don't like them.

@Cuppasoupmonster How about flatbreads or pita? And porridge oats? Are they any better or also set off the monitor?

@EarringsandLipstick My niece was eating a lot of grapes. Granted this was couple with beige food but it was definitely a contributor. I'm not saying fruit = bad, but blood sugar spikes are best kept to a minimum for overall health and too much can cause issues, laying down fat etc, issue worn insulin sensitivity.

Current thought suggests fruit can absolutely add to weight increase - certain types, as you say. It's just something to be mindful of, not scared of, or blacklist fruit. It's the blood sugar spikes which the body struggles to deal with repeatedly over the long term.

Different fruits absolutely have different properties. Apples are brilliant. Great for for Akermansia gut bacteria and general digestion. I think the old 'apple a day' saying has quite a lot of weight.

I've only read up to page 5, so I apologise in advance if this comment is repetitive! I think you're on the right track with small changes, OP. It's easy to continue skipping the nightly toast, and walking to/from school could be even more fun with a scooter? Skipping the evening yogurt should also be easy enough ('the shop ran out' etc).

My now 12yo DD bulked up a bit during lockdown, but when she started secondary she began cycling to and from school each day, which is about 4-5 miles altogether. In my family, girls have the tendency to put on weight before puberty as well, so it was unfortunate timing for her, but she's now perfectly fit and healthy, sporty and active. We don't have a culture of snacking at home, but we do have an end of week 'treat' on a Friday afternoon (tea and homemade biscuits type thing).

I have younger DC as well, and I work full time so use wraparound care. The food served there isn't ideal, unfortunately, but I can't do much about it. I just try to offset it by making healthy meals a standard offering at home with no snacks at the weekends or during breaks. I do feel like children are placated with regular snacks at school and clubs (near as I can tell they are being fed about every 2-3 hours throughout the day!). I don't have any other childcare alternatives unfortunately.

Op thanks for making this post.
My(just) four year old dd is 22kg and 110cm which is also overweight. She was born 99.6 centile and just has maintained that, so I've not necessarily thought to stop and check. It feels like a big task to 'fix' so I appreciate the ideas on this thread.

I think you've taken the advice really well. The one thing I would reinforce is not letting DD think she has a weight issue, do not discuss it Infront of her, even with your GP.
Clubs that have the maximum amount of activity but are also fun are great forms of exercise such as dance classes and swimming.You have to be there at her age but you can sit with baby and have a coffee.
I've seen a lot of tips (NRTFT) on the food she eats but I'd be seriously looking at portion control too. I'm often amazed at young children being given adult size meals in pubs/restaurants when we eat out.

There's always one. Oddballs on an internet forum = experienced mums who know that an almost five-year-old shouldn't weigh four stone and who have offered sensible advice to help the OP.

Lougle which website did you use for this? Looks very handy to help me keep track

If you're going to write a snarky, nasty comment, at least have the decency to RTFT. OP isn't going to ignore the letter and she's not being neglectful.

It's an app called 'Instant weight for height'. It's available on the Apple store, but if you want the Android version you have to download it from APK pure APKPure and go into your phone settings>security>more settings>install apps from external sources, to allow an install from outside of Google Playstore.

m.apkpure.com › ... › Medical
Instant Weight For Height APK for Android Download - Apps

m.apkpure.com/instant-weight-for-height/weightforheight.geneticdigital.co.uk.instantweightforheight

@AnuSTart my 9 year old son weighs 6 1/2 stone and he’s not overweight…seriously. He’s on 99th percentile for height and 85th for weight.

Not all the children are the same. There shouldn’t be any ridiculous emojis. And being tall is nothing to do with my children being over fed. DH is 6 ft 3. His nephew is 6 ft 4 and his niece 6ft 1. Height runs through his side of the family.

Thanks lougle

@NonJeNeRegretteRien I'm an oddball as I said some fruits spike sugar and this isn't good on a regular basis? Thanks

I would say you’re giving a bit too much credit to someone simply because they’re a parent. Philip Larkin didn’t pen This Be The Verse for no reason.

and yes, a great deal of what I’ve seen on this thread is odd as far as I’m concerned - and unhelpful.

Many unhealthy relationships with food begin in childhood and from how our parents treat us to view food. I see a lot of that in this thread.

The term oddball has clearly upset a number of posters, it was a flippant comment and should be treated as such but I’m sorry that it hasn’t been 👀 perhaps I’ve hit a nerve 👀… and focussing on being offended is a really good way to ignore the overall message in my post.

Yes, that’s absolutely what I said. You are welcome.

Because there’s a load of crap and dangerous advice on the internet and people without medical qualifications giving advice.
it’s absolutely fine to take a routine appointment at the GP surgery to discuss your overweight child. There used to be entire services to pick up these kids and address it early

I used to work in a primary school and had to arrange these tests. I always thought it was a bit of a waste of time because I could tell the children who were overweight just by looking at them. Unfortunately the parents always thought the measurements were wrong.
As other posters have said we have a very skewed perception of what children should look like.