My nearly 8 year old has become very podgy 😬

[justanotherneighinparadise]

I’m not sure what I can do 🤔

He doesn’t like sport so he’s not a child that naturally runs around, although he does do PE at school. His food isn’t too bad. I’ll give an example;

One poached egg on a piece of toast for breakfast.
Lunch is half a beef sandwich. Small yogurt. Grapes. Mini pepperami .
Snacks; small bag of organic gingerbread biscuits (they’re aimed at babies and sweetened with grape juice)
Small amount of grapes with a chopped up babybel
Dinner ; chicken curry with rice and a mini naan. Pudding is an ice lolly or a corner yogurt.

Drinks are milk and water.

What do we think? If it’s too much what would you do instead? He would happily skip breakfast but darent incase the school thinks it’s neglect or something 🤦🏻‍♀️ Portion sizes are pretty small but I could cut down the portion size for dinner.

He’s always tracked the 91st centile got height and weight but I’m pretty sure he’ll be over that for weight now. In fact I could do a child’s BMI to get an idea.

Does he complain about being hungry much?
Do you think he eats because he’s genuinely hungry or just out of habit/because the food is there?

He honestly won’t be forced into exercise even if I just sign him up to stuff. He just sits down and refuses to engage. So the person running the club tells me there’s little they can do with him.

I can cut down food though or at least make healthier exchanges 👌

@TwilightSkies

Does he complain about being hungry much? Do you think he eats because he’s genuinely hungry or just out of habit/because the food is there?

The only time he asks for food is after school. Would happily not eat breakfast.

@Loveatortie

I wouldn't worry, my son got the letter home from school that his weight was a concern at that age,no idea if they still send these out anymore. Anyway, he isn't a 6ft plus beefcake,however at 22 he is 5.10" and very slim. I worry more now than i did when he went through his chunky stage

Both me and his dad are slim/skinny. So I’m surprised he’s beefed out as much as he has. It definitely came on over lockdown but I assumed it would melt off once he got back to school. Sadly not.

@justanotherneighinparadise

He honestly won’t be forced into exercise even if I just sign him up to stuff. He just sits down and refuses to engage. So the person running the club tells me there’s little they can do with him.

I can cut down food though or at least make healthier exchanges 👌

What about Cubs? Not obviously ‘a sport’ but would involve lots of activity.

Mine all ate a lot more ,but mine are very tall

Could you drive part way to school and walk the rest on a safe route?

He was in beavers/cubs. No longer running due to covid.

@skelesheridan

Could you drive part way to school and walk the rest on a safe route?

I could park further away but would probably only increase the walk from 5 mins to 10. I’d happily do that.

The only time he asks for food is after school. Would happily not eat breakfast.

I think letting him eat intuitively might be a good idea. If he isn’t hungry, then breakfast is just needless calories. Plenty of people don’t get hungry until late morning/lunchtime.

Don't worry about it, I have non ID twin boys aged 13 (and three other kids) they eat the same meals one is chubby and hasn't grown yet, the other is taller than me and has nothing on him, my oldest son got a bit chubby in year 6, he's a very slim healthy 18 year old now, some kids put weight on before they grow, but I admit I did panic a bit with my first as I thought I was over feeding him

To be honest here half a beef sandwich does not sound like much?
I would give him a full sandwich and a piece of fruit. Save a treat in his lunch box for once a week or less.
Stop the car a mile away from school and walk is your answer.

It's really a shame people are implying you're not being honest about what your DS eats.

Realistically, if he is tracking his centile then I wouldn't imagine it would be a long term problem.

People saying you need to cut out after school snacks are ridiculous, my 7 and 11 year old come out starving.

Keep a balance of healthy snacks and fruit and veg and keep an eye on it.

No need for snacks or pudding. What is this obsession with snacks? My SIL is absolutely devoted to her kids and made a point of not giving them chocolate for waaaaay longer than was necessary in my opinion. But...from the moment they were weaned they were given snacks. Pots of grapes and rice cakes... Why? Also, pudding? My kids only discovered “pudding” at school. Now they’re asking for one every evening. Otherwise your son’s diet sounds fine. Maybe do a a Joe Wicks work out with him a couple of times a week? I assume they available on YouTube.

I wouldn't be worried about his weight, I'm sure he'll be due a growth spurt.
I'd be much more worried about what a couch potato he is!
There must be some activity you can convince him to do?
It's kind of your job as a parent (with dp) to encourage movement/exercise.

Can you ditch the car and cycle to school - it sounds like this might not be possible, so then you need park the car further away and walk more.
There must be something active this kid likes doing (unless he is SN?)

A lot of the snack mentality is actually set up by school. I’ve totally forgotten about the snack he has in school!!!! I’ve asked him today whether he wants a snack or cares about having one and he said he’s not bothered. So tomorrow I’m not going to provide a snack and see how he feels.

I decided to get a little more strict with pudding post dinner and say either jelly or yogurt when he wanted both. Then he said he was starving hungry and I don’t feed him. So now I feel like shit.

@goisey

I wouldn't be worried about his weight, I'm sure he'll be due a growth spurt. I'd be much more worried about what a couch potato he is! There must be some activity you can convince him to do? It's kind of your job as a parent (with dp) to encourage movement/exercise.

Can you ditch the car and cycle to school - it sounds like this might not be possible, so then you need park the car further away and walk more.
There must be something active this kid likes doing (unless he is SN?)

He is potentially SEN but no diagnosis and school wont engage as he’s not two years behind. Personally I think he shows traits but for now he’s keeping up academically and they are unconcerned.

He does like some sports that involve minimal movement. Any after school clubs that come up I sign him up, but like I said I’ve signed him up for lots of stuff pre covid and he refuses to participate. It all becomes a bit embarrassing.

We do take him out to practise riding his bike, the park etc. But he needs to be doing some vigorous exercise and that’s where we hit a well. He just won’t. Maybe if a lion was chasing him!! But otherwise no.

OP I don’t think that sounds like a bad diet at all really. In comparison my very slim DD has in her lunch
4 cream crackers and jam
4 smalll chicken satay sticks
Apple
Carrot
Chocolate brioche
Crisps

Plus a snack off a soreen malt loaf bar after school, plus dinner and pudding. And a bedtime snack of melon or satsuma and 2 biscuits.

It’s probably more the activity stuff. I’m not sure what you can do. Unless you try low impact but pottering. So a trip to the beach where he’s on the move all day paddling and collecting shells etc. But not getting hot and bothered. Or a long but gentle walk at the weekend. That kind of thing maybe?

If he isn’t hungry at breakfast don’t bother with it, he should only eat when hungry. As for exercise it’s important he does some even if he doesn’t want to, I wouldn’t give him a choice on the matter. Just take him out for a walk

I can take him out for a walk at the weekend. He hates it but I could definitely try.

Would he find Pokemon Go interesting? Might make the weekend walk less of a fight.

Actually we’ve never done that!! That’s a great idea!!

His diet doesn't sound too bad but you could maybe increase to a whole beef sandwich plus some salad or veg to fill him up more, cut out the peperami, cut down to one yogurt and 1 x grapes. Possibly yogurt or babybel rather than both.

PS. Dd1 is skinny as a rake but I've noticed dd2 is getting slightly chunkier and i do think lockdown has contributed. She's 13 so has more control over what she eats and drinks