Daughter's first period - preparations...

[tazziecat]

What I’ve learned in the past 24 hours:

Being prepared for my 11 year old daughter's first period doesn’t just mean giving her sanitary towels to take to school...(I’ve discovered) 😬😔

This is what I wish I’d done in preparation:

• [ ] Let her choose some groovy reusable sanitary pads in advance (including a little bag and a ‘mucky bucket’ to put used ones into prior to washing)
• [ ] Let her choose some absorbent leak proof pants
• [ ] Get extra pyjama bottoms
• [ ] Get loads of cheap dark pairs of knickers that she has permission to bin if required
• [ ] Do some research - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/teenagers/1437358-Eeeeeek-first-period
• [ ] give her a note for PE if necessary
• [ ] Water bottle for extra hydration
• [ ] Vitamins? Is she allowed iron now?
• [ ] Get extra sheets for her bed
• [ ] Get 2 mattress protectors
• [ ] Replace her bunk bed with a normal one that she can get out of quickly
• [ ] Get age appropriate pain killers
• [ ] Be available to answer lots of questions and give hugs
• [ ] Always have loads of toilet rolls
• [ ] Give her a big thing of salt to remove stains
• [ ] Give her her own washing basket in her bedroom
• [ ] Have an enclosed bin in the bathroom
• [ ] Let her talk for ages to her friends about it in private
• [ ] Show her a hormonal graph so she can understand her mood swings (I used my Hormonology app for the graph)
• [ ] Help her to create an emergency bag to take to school, which contains:

- [ ] Spare pair of clean knickers - [ ] Pocket size wet wipes - [ ] Pocket tissues - [ ] 2 reusable sanitary pads - [ ] Bag for soiled pads - [ ] Pain killers

Any additional advice will be very gratefully received

I've been recommended the apps Clue and Flo to track her periods, but we haven't used either of them yet...(Flo won't allow her to have been born in 2007!)

I wish my mum had told me that periods could be painful, I was an early starter, mine started at 9, I was in agony after the first few months but too scared to tell anyone, once I got a bit older I used to buy my own painkillers & hide them in my room & my school bag, it took me until I was 18 to go to the doctors & ask for the pill. I wish I had known that the pain isn't normal, it took until I was 45 to be diagnosed with endometriosis & to get treatment, schools should include information about endometriosis in sex education.

I'd say don't rush to try and use tampons and don't feel bad if you can't. I couldn't use tampons at first then I did and now 35 years later I simply use towels, they're so much better than the mattress style from the 80s😊 (tampons only for swimming) Also..use nighttime towels for the day as well as night...they're not bulky...and 2 pairs of pants at night, not little briefs but high legs (harvest festivals, 'all is safely gathered in 😂). Good Luck ...

Thanks so much for all the positive, supportive and constructive messages at an important time in my daughters life...they really have been helpful.

I know I'm OTT and I'm just wanting to do my best.

The reason we're going down the reusable pads route straightaway is because my daughter is very eco friendly and wants to do her bit for the planet. She's chosen black ones so she can't see the blood with a little bag, so hopefully she won't feel traumatised about having a dirty pad in her bag...we'll see. She's actually converted me over to reusable pads and knickers (and yes I realise I sound like a covert advertiser, but I'm honestly not ...and I regret naming those apps in my post because I haven't used either of them).

I admit that I did find some of the messages upsetting; however I posted the list on here really for the benefit of any male carers on here who have no direct experience and who have a daughter...

The list is very thorough and OTT as many of you have rightly pointed out, but I wanted it to be as comprehensive as possible. I hadn't given it enough thought and I'm no doubt trying to over compensate for my mistake!

I'm not saying we need to do everything on the list - I just wish I'd given it a little bit more thought than I did...

Thanks again for the helpful and kind messages - they really do mean a lot.

Good luck everyone

Oh my, I genuinely thought this was a joke thread!

Honestly OP, you will terrify your DD.

Better over-prepared than under-prepared I say!

There's over prepared and there is buying a new bed though

I guess it was traumatic for you and the DD, OP. It won’t always be such a shock and it will calm down. Think about it though, at the other end of menstruation going into menopause, the periods can get super heavy and leak everywhere, even every hour (Peri menopause) and they can make life hell. Similarly a young one starting early (age 11) can have the same problem. It’s the balance of periods stating and finishing (my doctor explained this). So until it calms down for your daughter OP, it might be super heavy for a while. Sorry. And it sounds liked her bed got ruined maybe? That must have been hard.

@allhdghd
Yes, I didn’t quite understand that bit!

OP why does she need a new bed?

I've got a few disposables but some funky fabrics and patterns to make customised reusables. She's up for trying this. And some period pants. It's her choice. If she wants to use disposables for now, that's her decision.
She's 11. Only a matter of time.
I don't have them any more.

Op said she needed a new bed because hers was a bunk bed but she needed a normal one that she can get out of quickly 🤔

Would a bungalow be too ott?