My beautiful Joseph with his blue eyes, ready smile and arms always open for a hug or a tickle fight

[Trazzletoes]

He has survived the most horrific cancer treatment with his smile, joy and love intact. Unfortunately the neuroblastoma has survived too.

Hi Trazzle- I'm in for that. Everything crossed and lots of prayers. You just never know!!

I'm good at praying for miracles. Lets be brave and really go for it with our prayers and positive thinking. It's good to be informed and realistic but it's also good to hope. I don't think anything is impossible for God. I believe in miracles.

Trazzle, will light candles for you in reality and also in my mind.

delurking, to say I have everything crossed and am wishing the very very best for Joe and you. Believe it believe it as fully as you possibly can, and if you can't any more, then deal with that then. For now, believe it forcefully. There's much science in hope. If there's a chance then keep hold of it. It's awful with the ups and downs- we are all here behind you xxx

I am hoping, wishing and praying with every thing for that miracle. Gingers crossed and splodging here always.
Today sounds a good day for Joe, hopefully you persuaded him to have tiger paint removed before bed! Big Roar to him, he sounds so fab you must burst with pride x

So pleased Joe is feeling so much better and you've been having some fun all together.

Wow at the news today. What a range of emotions you must be feeling. I'm going to channel even more positive thoughts, if that's possible, in your direction. Everything's crossed, absolutely everything, for you all. (It's tangledup here, by the way) x

Everything crossed here and sending up a little agnostic yet hopeful prayer.

Sending positive thoughts. And will think of you when I give blood tonight (you prompted me to do it, Super Joe!). xx

Thinking of you all daily. Also sending positive vibes for many, many happy moments with Joseph, whatever the future holds.

So pleased to hear about your lovely weekend.

X

Also crossing fingers, toes and sending positive vibes. X

sigh I've just had a call from the radiotherapy dept - that would have been next on Joe's treatment if this hadnt happened. Because of the possibility that the cancer has gone away, they have to urgently prepare him for radiotherapy just in case.

I hate that we are actively being prepared for the best case scenario when it is so unlikely.

Plus there's been chickenpox at DD's nursery so I have to go and get her now and keep her home for god knows how long. And Joe's friends have been round this afternoon and completely trashed the house. I love seeing them but hate them coming here. They just break and trash absolutely everything and it stresses me out no end.

I think I'm going to just sit and have a little cry before more madness descends.

I thought that the possibility of some good news would cheer me up. It hasn't. I'm crying today more than ever

Such a roller aster for you trazzles.
Such huge swings in emotion and mental anguish.
Do cry.
Do whatever you need to do to get through this.
X
(And yes, play dates are anarchy)

Oh Trazzles

Trazzles, what a grim time you are having. Let the tears come. They do no harm

I'm not surprised that your emotions are all over the place. Forget the chaos, stick on a video for Joe and DD and have a sit down yourself. x

You deserve a good cry. Just let it out lovey.

Don't blame you, my dear - a good old bawl can be the best thing for you, and you have more on your plate than anyone should reasonably have to cope with.

Can you get DD vaccinated for CP? It should be on the NHS given the circumstances... Not much help, but might mean she can return to nursery a bit sooner.

Trazzles, thinking of you and Joe so much (hugs)

tethers she's had the vax, 3 times actually because she was under 1 when she first had it. Because its not 100% effective and the consequences for Joe are so huge, his medical team has suggested we keep her off just in case while its doing the rounds.

Fortunately a fab friend is going to take her for me tomorrow morning while Joe has his GA and scan. I'm just at the end of my tether today. I'm right on edge and I have had enough of this shit.

Ah, sorry trazzle... I know it's not 100% effective, so it sounds like it's for the best to keep her off but I can understand how just one (relatively) little thing can push you over the edge.

I have nothing to offer but hugs, gin and half a KitKat I found under the sofa. All are yours.

Oh lord.... I just don't know what to say to you, poor trazzles :( . I do hope tomorrow goes ok. Do you have wine at home? xxxx

Oh lord.... I just don't know what to say to you, poor trazzles :( . I do hope tomorrow goes ok. Do you have wine at home? xxxx

No wine

Scan tomorrow should be fine. It's just for them to plan the radiotherapy. Won't tell us anything about the relapse.

I want to forget about the possibility of hope and they just won't bloody well let us.

Trazzle sending you love and hugs for this rollercoaster. No wise words today from me as we have been at the hospital all day for MRI scan so shattered, stressed and an agonising wait. I think I'll join you in a cry xxx