Anyone else have a normal job but feel like you should have high flying or meaningful job, because you’re CF?

[bushproblems]

I really struggle with not using my “full potential” even though i don’t actually know what that is.

Because we’re CF, in the back (and sometimes front) of my mind, I feel like I should either be earning mega bucks, or be in a role that means something to me. I’m in a position where I don’t have to worry about child care, or the cost of a child etc so I should be retraining and trying to find my passion. Or at least earn silly money.

If we don’t have children, I would like my job to actually mean something to me. Rather than just staring at a laptop all day.

Am I being ridiculous?

Do you like your job?

just realised what CF is. An abbreviation which is easily mistaken!

I don't feel like that at all. I like my normal, easy job. I wouldn't want to be a high flier!
I do want my life to be meaningful but for me personally, work doesn't have any bearing on that.

Feeling entitled because you are child free.

I'm guessing child free?

I know.exactly what you mean
Im not.acheving my.full potential hut never really and a passion

Me!

Used to earn more but hated it. Now earn much less but love it. Working on a plan to make more money going forward.

I think the best thing you can do is to do it as if no one is watching. Do it for you and no one else. Who cares if you’re not earning a squillion. If you leave on time and get to do nice stuff outside work and that makes you happy then that’s all that matters.

How old are you OP?

I'm late 40s and don't feel I need to continue to climb the ladder nor become the CEO! I enjoy my current job, despite earning £5,000 less than I did 10yrs. That role was very stressful and hands on, whereas I now have a far better work/life balance. I now work to live, rather than live to work.

OP- maybe you need a hobby or something else to full fill what you feel is missing?

I have a normal job and although I don’t feel like you, I know what you mean. I feel more pressure in my social life, like I should be out every night making the most of not having kids 🤣

I much preferred cool fucker 😂

I think that’s it, I feel like I should be “making the most” of being child free.

Entitled to what?

im guessing because your child free they think you are entitled to be higher up the corporate structure.

I work 2 days a week on 20k and child free. I'm 30. Its bliss. I have a dog and do whatever I want.

In Mumsnet world I thought it meant cheeky fucker so I was a tad confused!

Oh right! I think that might be right @TheMerryJoker

I’d actually prefer to be in a meaningful role such as nursing or midwifery If I had a choice , but money is always nice!

I don’t have money or a meaningful job though, just to reiterate, That’s the point of the thread.

I’m 40 and a bit of a bore! I don’t have any hobbies or passions, I really need help finding these things.

I don’t have money or a meaningful job though, just to reiterate, That’s the point of the thread.

Its not too late to re train if you want to do something different then.

No, I don’t feel I need to justify myself. It feels like it plays into this narrative that you have to somehow explain yourself if you don’t have children. I never explain myself.

I like my job though and get a lot out of it. If you don’t maybe time to make some plans, start saving to re-train.

I think that’s one of the sillier bits of projection childfree people tend to get stuck with — that because they’re not rearing children, they have to be either (1) career high-fliers bestriding the global corporate world or (2) joyous, hippy free-spirits driving their surfboards around Asia in a camper van.

I mean, fuck that. The childfree are as entitled to potter around in their slippers getting their kicks from their houseplants as anyone else.

I thought cheeky fucker, then client facing….didnt think of child free!!!

I am child free and have no desire to progress any further at work. It has become a means to an end of me and success to me is being happy rather than how far up the corporate ladder I have climbed. If you want to work up the ladder then do it but I imagine if you haven't been that person before now then it won't make you happier or more satisfied with life.

Plenty other ways of doing that other than working. Although if you want or need to earn more then obviously you need to look at how you do this.

Otherwise you need to work on finding ways of spending your time outside work to occupy yourself and then you'll lose any desire for a 'big job'.

I work 4 days a week in a specialist role that recognises my experience and professional certifications. However I have no line management responsibilities or expectations to work beyond contracted hours, in fact it is discouraged so it doesn’t feel like a big job and is only quite well paid because its very niche, I've sort of sleepwalked into where I am today which is nowhere near as high profile as it could have been but I wouldn't have wanted that.

I like that I have more time to go hiking, wander round cities visiting museums and galleries, swim outside in summer, read, go on holiday etc etc.

Think about what you'd like to do for fun and consider that to be your 'making the most of being child free'.

Very average career for me. Most of the women (and men) senior to me at work have children, so I don't feel there is a weight of expectation in my environment - may be different in other environments..

I am not hugely bothered about being a high flyer - I don't think I have it in me. If I had a job where I earned ££££ I'd just do it for long enough to save enough to retire.

That said, I'd love to have a job I was brilliant at and that I really enjoyed doing but I can't think of one I could realistically get, that would work in terms of salary, location, what I'm qualified for etc.

Oh, well. I can always hope - I do keep my eye out for opportunities.

Or (3) climbing Kilimanjaro for charity.