Where can I go at Christmas to avoid all the family stuff?

[sadsister23]

I don't have children even though I'd like to and it's looking unlikely that I will be able to have any of my own so I am currently grieving that. I really struggled last year with the emphasis on family at Christmas time and seeing all my friends and peers with their children having a lovely time. My best friend has just announced her pregnancy and, whilst I am happy for her, it has hit me hard as it's another person who won't be around and another relationship that will change.

It may be a bit early to be thinking about this but does anyone have any ideas of somewhere I can go reasonably inexpensively for a few days over Christmas to escape it all? I have a partner but he enjoys spending Christmas with his family so I will probably go alone.

Oh I’m so sorry. Could I ask what kind of budget you have in mind?

I go to Austria 🇦🇹

Tenerife for some winter sun?

Sign up as a house/pet sitter. Loads needed over Xmas. If you're interested I'll post more info. I've been doing it for years, it's fab!

I went skiing years ago.
Joined a chalet party of strangers in Andorra.
Locally, up on the slopes, it was as if Christmas didn’t exist.

Chalet maids made us a fabulous evening dinner.
I recommend it.

work in a shelter for the homeless?

I'd go somewhere that didn't celebrate Christmas at all, like Hong Kong, and I'd go on a group tour. I'm so sorry, it sounds absolutely shit for you.

My friend goes to a yoga retreat down in Devon.

@Gladespade no idea really, I am a student atm so maybe £300? Not sure if that is realistic though! I do have savings that I could (and would) dip into for this because the material cost will be less than the cost to my mental health if I stay here.

@helpfulperson I've never been to Austria so that could be a good shout! I don't love the cold though so @ZenNudist 's idea of Tenerife might be better lol.

@heldinadream please do post more info about house/pet sitting - I wouldn't know where to begin looking for this stuff.

@PashaMinaMio that sounds amazing! I might forgo the skiing as I have weak bones and am afraid of breaking them but the rest of that sounds brilliant.

@60andsomething do you know how to get a place working for soup kitchens at Xmas? I have looked before but they seem to get booked up very quickly. It's something I'd love to do though.

@MILTOBE I'd love to go to Hong Kong one day, it looks like such an interesting place. Unfortunately my budget won't stretch that far but I will definitely bear it in mind for future Christmases.

@Zippedydoodahday can you go to yoga retreats if you're terrible at yoga?
🙈

For working in a homeless shelter, it is best to apply at the start of September. Try Crisis, as an obvious one, although they are no longer run the way they used to be, since covid, But also try looking for a local one.

I think if I was trying to stick to a budget I would rent a small flat in one of the historic cities like York or Oxford, take loads of books, go to a church service at the minster or one of the university churches, mooch round looking at the architecture, sitting in nice cafes, pick up snack food, do some Boxing Day shopping, generally take some time for me. If I had more money I would go to the canaries

House sitting sounds interesting though!

@sadsister23 so house-sitting. It's not paid work. There are a couple of websites you can put yourself on, I'll link them. I use House Sitters UK which is fairly basic and cheaper, you pay a yearly fee (under £30) then you can post a profile and contact house sits and they can contact you. I've been doing it for a while and have a few excellent reviews but if you can get a reference and offer it as a new sitter that'll help.
You basically go look after the person's house and pets. Cats - so easy. Especially if you like them. Dogs obviously more work. Then there are parrots, rabbits...😄 Most places will say you can eat anything from their stores while you're there but I usually just get a supermarket shop delivered just after I arrive. Offer yourself to sits that you fancy and if you get in quick you can get some amazing ones, I've stayed in some fabulous houses in beautiful locations that would have cost me big bucks as holiday homes. And I have a few regulars now which is really nice, they know me, I know them, I know the house and the cats (I don't do dogs!). With a new sit we usually 'meet' over zoom first. There's competition but as I say if you keep an eye on new postings and are quick off the mark you can be really lucky. I'll post the two sites I'm most familiar with, the first is the cheaper one that I am on, the second one (Trusted Housesitters) more expensive to join but they have sits abroad, too. Make your profile interesting and be proactive going after sits that you like the look of! Good luck!

If you decide to do it ask me anything that comes up I'll try and answer.

House sitting, pet sitting, dog sitting in the UK - House Sitters UK

Pet Sitters in the United Kingdom | TrustedHousesitters.com

https://www.trustedhousesitters.com/?irclickid=Ssp3TOX1zxyPUoByH83HA2GuUkHQqWyaBzauRc0&irgwc=1&utmsource=impact&utmmmedium=affiliate&utmcontent=4256818-CNT

dear OP, @sadsister23 . i have just booked that time in Bali (same reasons to yours) a beautiful place im staying at just now.. its private and divine. Bali is humid in December yet this small resort has great aircon, wifi, etc. you will be SURE to make new friends & have space freedom, lots of beauty, activity, amazing sights, music, gorgeous food. And though Bali has hype, and is probs £869 return flight around xmas, once you are here you can stay as little as £15 per night accommodation decently with walk to the beach; and cheap private transport, eating drinking budget about £25 depending on your lifestyle... I promise you will forget all about xmas!!!

otherwise, cheaper! & to spin it, between now and then get a dbs check to work with children... or just show up that week dressed as a Christmas fairy/angel/grincheux and visit the elderly? or.... please dont make any judgement on this one... cruise. very good prices! i just got off my 4th. superb value!!!

dont be sad, sister. you have blessings many mums would trade for... xxx

wow! great advice!!🤗

What kind of place do you like - city, country, coast?

Would you rather be alone or with other people?

Egypt.

well- my parents are Jewish so not that big on Christmas.

They often go on a cruise. Some of them specify if they are christmas or non-christmas cruises.

When I was a teen we went to Singapore and Egypt for an AI experience.

Don't you think it would better to deal with the issues that are at the front of your life , rather than making long term plans for avoiding those that you know will affect you in the near future .You are avoiding dealing with these issues that will make you a misery for life .

I don’t know, it sounds to me like op is taking steps to safeguard her mental health and taking control of the situation is dealing with it. Doing Christmas differently could be a positive thing.

Have a look at glamping pods on air bnb! That's exactly what I am doing this year and will have my book for company . Mine also has a little wood burning hot tub (and indoor heating ) so I'll be quite happy to forget all about Xmas for a few days.

It's always annoyingly pricey going away over Christmas, even if it's just a few days. If you could up the budget a little bit, Morocco is the nearest non-Christmassy place I can think of. Otherwise the pet-sitting idea is great - you'll be somewhere with a purpose, have all mod cons and furry company!

Great forward planning OP!
I always fantasised about this!
House sitting great idea. Otherwise you will need to dip into savings I think.
If so, Marrakesh is a good shout. Stay in the Medina though, not further out.
I would counsel against a solo historic city break in the U.K at Christmas. Guaranteed to be depressing ( and expensive.)

@60andsomething thank you, I will certainly look into that.

@heldinadream @Nonewclothes2024 love this idea! Thank you so much.

@Comeondelicious oh Bali sounds dreamy, I'm sure you'll have a lovely time! I like the idea of working with children or the elderly. I had never considered a cruise before but perhaps if I could find an adults only one it could be an option.

@cherryassam tbh I am not fussy, I just need to be away from the happy families stuff. It would be cool to meet other people whilst I'm away but that's not a pre-requisite.

@bluetopazlove yes absolutely I do - each day is such a struggle for me. Do you have any ideas of how I can do this because I am trying but have found no solutions thus far.

@Gladespade that's really kind, thank you. I am trying to look at it as a positive thing.

@shootingstar1 i didn't realise you could have heating in a glamping pod -that could certainly be an option then!

@Words thank you, there is a lot to think about. I really appreciate your positivity in terms of my forward planning. I do question whether this is just me 'running away' but equally I need a plan to manage it.

Hey @sadsister23 it is really difficult so well done on trying to find a way to manage it.

One thing I've found helpful is to not see my family and friends with children and stay at home doing my own thing - getting all the food I like, deciding what to watch on the telly, have lie ins etc If budget is an issue maybe that could work for you.