Maternity Leave Equivalent (Wild Speculation)

[NeonSoda]

So I was wildly speculating with a friend last night, and I said that I thought it would be wonderful if child-free people could have the same 52 week x £172 benefit given as maternity leave, but without having to have a child.

If that was something you could opt to receive, as a childfree person, what would you do with your 52 weeks of subsidised break from full-time employment?

(NB - the condition here is that you cannot do your job for those 52 weeks and also receive the money, just like a person on maternity leave can't.)

@daliesque That’s horrific, I’m sorry. I went through a cancer scare and a surgical emergency and lost my uterus and ovaries as a precautionary step and to save my life. It was negative but the surgical recovery and entry into menopause was brutal. I went back in to have someone ask if I couldn’t have kids because if that had been them “I’d rather have died then not have my babies”. Then burst into tears.

I don’t know what possesses some people to be such arseholes about infertility.

I am a parent but stumbled upon this thread.

I thjnk receiving, across a working life, one or two "use it or lose it" bursaries of £6700 (current SMP which is c.£170 x 39 weeks) for up to 52 weeks off and the security of returning to an equivalent - though not the same necessarily - role would be a good idea. It would pay for itself in terms of mental health benefits and I'd wager much of the cash would be ploughed back into the economy. It would also be a good leveller and would encourage companies to ensure staffing continuity and expect people to work to live, not live to work.

Another idea would be a sort of equity release scheme from your retirement fund...

Personally - and I'm biased - I don't think it should be linked to childbearing status any more than it should be for sick leave , but I do understand the argument for it to be. I just think there'd be an uncomfortable realisation 20 years down the line that (a significant subset of) dads were having the year off in their 50s when kids have left home or are independent and having a cycling tour round the Pyrennes while mothers were still expected to spend it doing unpaid labour while lactating / bleeding / recovering from major surgery.

Obvious the country is on its arse so it would never happen but its an interesting idea.

The thread is in Active

Yes, we know. We’ve asked MN twice to remove it but they refused and put the “please be respectful” banner up instead. Which everyone ignores.

I’d travel across America with my partner. As it’s fantasy the dogs could come too.

And I would never come here and opine about being childfree. I just don't think including maternity leave in this discussion is particularly respectful.

I will fight for childfree people to get Christmas off as often as those with children, or to get recognition if they're working more hours and thus achieving more when it comes to promotions. I just don't see why this particular discussion needs to pit parents against the childfree.

Especially because, as @distinctpossibility points out, men would just not take parental leave giving them a glorious year off in their 50s. It would just become a policy to punish mothers.

Yes, we know. We’ve asked MN twice to remove it but they refused and put the “please be respectful” banner up instead. Which everyone ignores.

😬 I didn’t notice, if it’s in active I rarely look which board its on.

Why won’t mumsnet just take it out of active?

They said that it’s important that people can find it.

You do know parents don't have to fund house deposits for their kids, right? No law etc.

Education- well yes, Uni costs are astronomical.

You are also assuming that childfree people all work in high paying jobs, whilst in reality we are spread out across the population just like parents are.

My then husband and I paid for the deposit on our first flat by maxing out both of our credit cards.

And they won't give us an Ignore Poster button, either, which would be even more useful than coming out of Active. 😬

I just don't see why this particular discussion needs to pit parents against the childfree.

It’s only the parents doing that.

Mat leave is a useful comparator because it’s the only other legally-protected right to paid time away from work to pursue something that the person taking it desires to pursue.

It isn’t parent-bashing to use it as a comparator. Parents on this thread are determined to take it as a dig and we’re once again derailing a thread to deal with parents querying our use of our own board.

Why maternity leave and not sick leave?

Because there's one hell of a fucking difference.

Yep, descended into madness again.

To be honest, as one of life's procrastinators, I'd do exactly the same 🤣

I took a year out following my divorce, I travelled and learnt to drive set up a business learnt candle making soap making and keto baking. It was lovely. Now I work three days and run my business the other two.

We are less than remember. But from me just

Raising a child is a lifestyle choice.

Being unwell is not a lifestyle choice.

That is why, in my world, parental leave would be part of the paid sabbatical programme and potential parents would have to decide if having children was as valuable to them as other activities they could choose to do.

I posed the same question on my Facebook and added the term that if the period of leave would be used for child rearing, then both parents would have to take the same period of leave at the same time and it must be used exclusively for child rearing.

I like to think I’d sort my health out, go to gym classes. Other than that I’d be happy to just potter at home, hopefully a friend would take the same year as me so we could be ladies that lunch.

I’ve worked in the leisure industry since I was 16, on and off. One of the most wonderful and luxurious things that I do each year is spend a week abroad at a sports resort where I can do gym classes all day every day. 😅

I work hard in the public sector, and have done for 25 years. By the time I retire, I will have done 40 years. I think a sabbatical away from making my contribution to society sounds like a very apt and appropriate thank you from everyone else.

*Raising a child is a lifestyle choice.

Being unwell is not a lifestyle choice.

That is why, in my world, parental leave would be part of the paid sabbatical programme and potential parents would have to decide if having children was as valuable to them as other activities they could choose to do.*

Absolutely well said, @NeonSoda !!!

I don't mena to be rude but HPW do peope NOT notice?
It shows it right there. Just above title, then it takes one to the top of the page where it is in big letters WITH a note from MNHQ

I just think there'd be an uncomfortable realisation 20 years down the line that (a significant subset of) dads were having the year off in their 50s when kids have left home or are independent and having a cycling tour round the Pyrennes while mothers were still expected to spend it doing unpaid labour while lactating / bleeding / recovering from major surgery.

Especially because, as @distinctpossibilitypoints out, men would just not take parental leave giving them a glorious year off in their 50s. It would just become a policy to punish mothers.

So basically it's "You can't have it because mothers have terrible partners who would use it later for fun instead of when the child is young".
I am getting really frustratdd here so here the truth goes.
The fact that women partner with useless men is no one else's fault.
You are essentially saying here that no one cam have this nice (IMAGINARY EVEN) thing because women choose bad fathers to their kids.
Raise your standards 🤷

Thors sake, people. Just have to ruin any possibly fun hypotheticals here, eh.

I've spent some good chunks of time not working, or working part-time during which I did a lot of travelling and did a second degree. I think it was more possible to do that in the past - mortgages not so expensive, wages relatively higher, uni costs lower, plus I really didn't care about having a career. In a perfect world everyone would have a decent stretch of time to develop themselves outside of work.

Now at 54 I'd take the year to get really healthy, write a book, do weekend trips, learn a language, read a lot, do art. I've got pets so don't think I'd do a long trip.

I'd left the thread, but I'll respond on this. I don't have a useless partner, he pulls his weight, I wasn't speaking personally.

However you would have to be blind not to realise that on the whole women are left with the bulk of unpaid caring responsibilities. This is also backed up by countless studies, it's a fact not an opinion. This isn't just care for children, but elder care too and presumably this will apply even more to women without children who have traditionally been expected to take on far more than their share of that particular burden.

Making shit men the fault of women is not a particularly enlightened position to take.