Oh bugger

[Mousey84]

I am a CM, and regularly bring a 5 year old boy to school in mornings. I stand at patrol man and he walks across and down to doors, into school (round a corner where I cant see him actually go in) and once he rounds the corner I go to the house just across from the school to pick up another mindee.

Since September, the doors have been open from 8.40 (prob earlier, but in the days I did walk him right down, we were never there earlier than that) We got there at 8.47, he walked in as normal. Except he didnt. He went and left his bags and went up into the playground, and I didnt see him do that. Mum just called, really cross (boy said he felt ill to a neighbour who was leaving another child in). I completely understand why she is cross and feel so stupid for not walking him right in - it only takes 2 mins. (But) since the doors were always open before... Anyway Ill be walking him in from now on and waiting to ensure he takes off coat and into classroom (actually, Ill prob just leave house later so we just get there before bell goes and doors are locked)

So now what should I do? Write an incident report to NICMA (our version on NCMA)? Write a formal letter to parent?

BTW, I dont time everything we do, I just know it was 8.47 as Id looked at watch- thought we were late and door would already be locked, in which case I bring the kids to different entrance

When did the mum call?

I would apologise profusely and then write an incident report, a formal letter and also a risk assesment of the task.

I'd write an incident report & then do a risk assessment & say how I will prevent it next time (not that there will be a next time)

She called there now - presumably now her son is in bed.

Will get incident report and risk assessment typed up now, and handwrite a letter for tomorrow morning (no access to printer before tomorrow afternoon)

Oops - thanks for replies.

I can see that it was not your fault, you did what you have always done, it didn't work out just once, no harm came to him.

However, I would not be happy with this scenario with my 5 yr old. I would want her taken into the classroom and stayed with until the bell rings and the door is locked at 8.50. This is what I and all the other parents in my dd's class do. However, I would make this clear to my CM from the start. Did she know that you do not take him in and supervise him being handed over to the teacher? If not, then I guess she assumed you did and was annoyed to find out you didn't?

Actually, re-reading your post I'm actually quite intrigued as to why you haven't been walking him in and just letting him go by himself? I'm not a child minder, but I'd have thought being a CM would mean you're totally more protective/vigilant than you would be with your own child. Meaning they would be supervised at all times.

I have just found a new CM and this has made me worry even more that my dd will not be looked after to the level that I look after her (although she seems lovely and a great CM).

Sorry OP, not having a go at you. But from a protective parents point of view it seems a little scary. We all make mistake though eh - no harm done in the end.

Reality - I did wonder if I got the wrong idea from Mousyy84's OP as the others seemed to think the mother was in the wrong.

Now you have confirmed that it was as I read. I'd be going nuts too. Has the mum given you notice OP?

We are not allowed into the school (with exception of primary 1 carers/parents in first few weeks) The boy I look after is P2, and very very few people walk right to doors. I did walk him in at start (September) and boy got cross and embarrassed (v sensitive wee lad), and I started to back off, first to corner, then inside gate then at patrol man. After 4 months of following the routine, I did not expect school routine to change, or that he would do anything other than go straight in, esp as we had seen his best mate leave house before us and was already in the classroom.

If we are ever late and at risk of being locked out, I always walk down to check doors, and take him to other entrance if necessary. Its not like I just dump him and run!

Did the mum know you weren't walking him into school?

If she didn't know then I find it quite shocking!

I was at Mousey

But mousey - you didn't answer what everyone is asking you hun, did the mum know what you were doing?

What an odd set up for the school. So once the kids are left at the doors is there a member of staff to stop them running off into the playground/out the gate and up the road? I'd not be happy with the school set up if not.

Also, I would not let a 5 yr do something unsupervised just because he was embarassed by me being there. Why did you need to back off at his say so? DO the other 5 yr olds walk to school themselves? Surely parents do not let their kids go accross the road at the patrol man, and wonder off into school? I find it a little odd.

But how will you walk him in from now on, if the school doesn't allow you in?

Ah sorry lifeinagoldfishbowl - I thought you were at the mum daring to ring and complain.

Mousey84 - Did you post because you feel guilty or because you thought the mum was unreasonable to ring and go mad?

I'd be livid if this was my ds. I don't really think this should happen EVER with a 5 year old anything could happen if you can't see him going into the school for example some wierdo could be watching your routine and is waiting to grab him, something flies away in the wind, he runs after it and gets knocked over. I'd think myself extremely lucky that nothing serious did happen if i were you. Sorry if harsh but you don't seem to think this bad mousey.

A five year old's pride would not stop me walking him into school. When I cm'd I walked year 6's into school and physically watched them go into the classroom. As a mum of a five year old I would be livid TBH, my DS is not even close to being able to be trusted to walk into his classroom without being watched.

My dd (5 - also in P2) would love the chance to have a sneaky go on the playground equipment if I didn't see here, or she might take her fancy to pop to her nannys round the corner, or wander off to the shop etc.

If I look after friends kids for a few hours then I am so ott with watching them they don't move from my line of vision for more than 2 seconds. I can't believe you've been doing this everyday! Also, how could you know if his best friend was already in the class room, you couldn't see! Not sure how that justifies sending him on his way either.

I'm meeting my CM on Friday and i think I will go over how I expect my dd to be supervised and that she is not to be left alone, sent into school alone etc.

Sorry mousy, but you don't let a 5 year old dictate what you do. You are in loco parentis - you do what is right even if it makes you unpopular.

Did you tell the mum that the teacher wasn't coming out any more?

As a childcarer, you do have to supervise to a higher standard than a parent might. I'm a nanny and I don't let my charges out of my sight, even in situations that I would if they were my own kids.

Mousey - Is this a wind up? You don't seem to be getting the seriousness of it.

You realised the teacher was no longer coming out, surely you should talk to the parents about this. What 90% of the other parents do is of no concern, you are a CM, therefore responsible for somebody elses child.

How's does "backing off gradually" make any difference? Perhaps if you continue he could walk from your house himself by next April?1? Isn't a "wee road" stilla road with cars.

I'm sorry, but what happened is bad enough but with your failure to realise the seriousness of your actions and unbelieveable reasoning and excuses I have to say I hope she reports this to Ofsted.