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Original poster

Help - i'm falling for my charges dad!

43 replies

LolaTheShowgirl · 07/04/2009 18:23

I used to nanny full time for a family before I changed my career. I now look after the children as and when of an evening I am required which is usually a few nights per week and often go along on family outings to theme parks etc at weekends. I'm really close to them all but something happened the other night before I left and I can't stop thinking about the dad.

Everyone was in bed except the dad and I. I was staying over there as I regularly do as it's too far to travel home late at night when buses and trains stop running. We were just sat (on the same sofa) watching tv and having a joke around and he leaned over and kissed me (just like in the movies). It felt amazing. The next morning I had to rush out before anyone was up (early start for work) but since then I have recieved texts from him saying how much he enjoyed the kiss and that he wanted that to happen for ages and he hopes this might be the start of something special. Now I can't stop thinking about him.

OP posts:
traceybath · 07/04/2009 18:24

Is he married? If so snogging him whilst his wife is upstairs is hardly like the movies.

If he's single - well different situation.

aGalChangedHerName · 07/04/2009 18:25

You know what everyone is going to say don't you???

You don't mess with a married man FGS.

Don't know what advice really but don't do iy.

madwomanintheattic · 07/04/2009 18:25

er, when you say 'family' are you talking one-parent?

LIZS · 07/04/2009 18:25

Stop visiting now !

PullMyFinger · 07/04/2009 18:25

run for the hills lola he is not worth losing your professional reputation over

MuffinBaker · 07/04/2009 18:26
Hmm
madwomanintheattic · 07/04/2009 18:28

my ex-nanny shacked up with one of her charges dads. when i offered her the job she thanked me for trusting her.

she was under the impression that the agency had told me lol.

if he is still married and with his wife, and you are working for them both, you need to leave. yesterday. what you do after that in terms of shagging your ex-employer is your own business.

bubblerock · 07/04/2009 18:30

Definitely remove yourself from the situation. If you care about the family as much as you say, you wouldn't want to be the cause of a break up. Difficult for you, I know, but do the right thing

Twims · 07/04/2009 18:30

Agree with PullMyFinger not only will you gain a reputation as someone who has dalliances with married men but you will also loose your proffessional reputation.

Just stop working for them now - just say you are very busy with other things and hope they can find someone else to cover for you.

Daffodingles2 · 07/04/2009 18:32

God Lola No!
Don't go there! It's not like the movies at all, it causes nothing but heartache, worry and misery all for the sake of a bit of excite mentand I know this from bitter experience.
If he's single it's another story all together but I don't remember you mentioning this before.

Original poster
LolaTheShowgirl · 07/04/2009 18:37

Oh sorry, I forgot to say that he is a single father. Divorced from wife who left when little one was a few months old and he is single.

OP posts:
Blottedcopybook · 07/04/2009 18:38

Ugh, assuming that he's not a single parent if you care for the kids in that family at all then why did you let him kiss you?! FGS, get out of that situation right now.

Daffodingles2 · 07/04/2009 18:39

Bloody hell Lola,...talk about you missing out a major piece of info!!!
well that changes everything....
so ? do you like him?
If yes, go out for a drink and see where the land lies. Then stop working for them in a professional capacity.

MarshaBrady · 07/04/2009 18:39

I just did a massive intake of breath when I read that op, but then I see he's single. So all ok really!

Blottedcopybook · 07/04/2009 18:39

Apologies - just saw your post.

I don't think there's a conflict of interest myself, but I'm fairly laid back generally. I would advise proceeding with caution and don't let the children know what's going on until you are sure where you want this to go.

LIZS · 07/04/2009 18:40

Sorry still think you're more flattered at the attention than genuine. Even if it is real having a bit of distance won't hurt. Thought you had a bf anyway ?

MuffinBaker · 07/04/2009 18:41

I am not sure this is what you need right now.

itchyandscratchy · 07/04/2009 18:41

arh well that's different...

but do be aware that (no offence) but he will have been very lonely since his dw left and he's probably not been out much. Sorry about how that sounds! It does sound all romantic and everything, but tread carefully - you're still his employee. If things get more serious you might be better off not working for him and just dating him.

Homebird8 · 07/04/2009 18:42

Did you like him, or even think about him, before the kiss? If not walk away. It's so easy to get to thinking things you don't really by the mere possibility of the thrill. Nearly got caught this way once myself.

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 07/04/2009 18:42

think you need a boyfriend without baggage, you have had so much shite to deal with that i think a potential step parent scenario is not what ou need and also, you should keep work and love life seperate IMO

you need uncomplicated things in your life

Original poster
LolaTheShowgirl · 07/04/2009 18:44

Sorry, the most vital piece of info was missed out there!

I will def keep my distance. I've kind of fantasised about this man before (as some nannies prob do). After all, he is handsome, intelligent, has a fantastic job, lives in a mini-mansion, is caring, can look after kids single handedly etc etc, but always really thought nothing would happen.

OP posts:
Original poster
LolaTheShowgirl · 07/04/2009 18:46

Lizs, that boyfriend didn't last too long. The distance and our timetables clashing didn't work out too well but we're still friends. He's a lovely person.

OP posts:
LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 07/04/2009 18:49

don;t wish to sound rude, but you might be the easy option for him

baby sitting on tap too.

i think you should try to find someone without a history and without children

itchyandscratchy · 07/04/2009 18:50

yeah, try not to get too "Jack and Sarah" about it all...

(tempting though that would be )

pointydog · 07/04/2009 19:05

WARNING:

DO NOT GET A NANNY. CALLED LOLA