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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Au Pair Experts-Over here please......

65 replies

whooosh · 05/10/2008 22:11

Been looking for an Au Pair since nanny left in the Summer (actually loving have the house to ourselves so been a bit slack about it).Out of the blue,managed to interview a Romanian girl,already in the country,on Saturday.
Have offered her the job and she has accepted-ariving Tue PM.
A couple of questions.....

Other than a bunch of flowers,a bit of local inof etc-waht should we have ready for her?

Secondly,we are off on holiday for a week from 14th Ocotber-big risk leaving new AP in the house so soon after joining us I know-but should we pay her a full weeks salary? SHe is starting pre-our holiday at her request as she couldn't afford her rent where she is now.

Should we leave her at all?

She seems really sweet and appears to have had a pretty rough time since being in the UK but we do only have one side of the story.....can you tell I am nervous????

OP posts:

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Original poster

whooosh · 07/10/2008 20:04

Badpups-am in Knebworth but in Broxbourne very regularly....25mins away.

Have always recruited nannies myself-perhaps Au Pair are better through an agency.....

OP posts:

DadInsteadofMum · 07/10/2008 20:43

Whoosh - sounds like there is one box she doesn't tick, the gut instinct one. I have interviewed a few who seemed OK, answered all the questions well and seemed experienced but I just didn't feel comfortable so I said no. Couldn't up with a reason for rejecting them that I could explain but something didn't feel right. If you are not 100% comfortable should you be taking her on (and reading the earlier posts were you 100% happy before the driving issue came up).

I always take mine out for a little test drive, to date they have all hit the kerb (hard) at the same point on a tight bend near here (two tyres and one wheel down to date). If I am not happy they then go out with my FIL who is a driving instructor, they are then not allowed out witht he kids until he is happy with them, but then I guess not everybody has a FIL with a dual controlled car.

Simply · 07/10/2008 22:32

I second listening to the gut instinct box. I wish I'd listened to my (and my dd's) gut instinct on our first ap. Oh, to turn back the clock!

cheapskatemum · 07/10/2008 22:37

Aupairworld and greataupair websites always seem to have loads of young German women who want to be au pairs in UK. Have recruited our last 2 APs this way. Both have been excellent drivers and really nice. You can talk to them on the phone. Try it?

Original poster

whooosh · 07/10/2008 22:45

Interestingly I had narrowed my search on AuPair World to Germans and Swedes..... and this one slipped through the net.
She probably wouldn't have caught my eye except she was already in the UK and we could really interview her.

Had 5 days of hell 2yrs ago with super-qualifed,referenced-up-to-the-eyeballs-reserched-beyond-normality, Canadian who was a complete nightmare.Knew the minute we picked her up from the airport she was wrong so have been slightly tainted.

She ticks as many boxes as I guess any AuPAir will so feel I should give her a chance.If she flunks the assessment then-goodbye.
If she passes then I think I will suggest an hour a day pracise for her on her own....

Oh God,why can't life be simple?We are realy nice,house is normal but nice,they are treated like a member of the family,the odd perk,only one child....should be simple no?

OP posts:

mumof2222222222222222boys · 08/10/2008 09:06

i feel for you Whooosh. Fwiw we are on our 3rd French au pair (Au Pairs by Pebbles) and driving is a must for us. All have been absolutely fine and we only arranged a formal lesson for the first one. All went out several times with DH and no driving with children until he declared them safe. My rules are that they must have held a driving licence for at least a year - partly due to the experience I feel they need to have and also partly due to a MN thread that talked about the insurance cost rocketing if they have driven for a lesser time.

squiffy · 08/10/2008 09:20

I tend to get my AP's from Scandinavia. They are generally horrified at how poorly we drive here in the UK . And the BSM chaps always give them a big thumbs up when they assess them.

Now the Turkish girl we had...... well, let's just say that I didn't expect to have a full blown argument at a T junction onto a dual carriageway about whether or not one should stop and give way....

Original poster

whooosh · 08/10/2008 09:44

Squiffy!

Still Hoping BadPups' lovely Au Pair might have a lovey friend {hopeful emoticon}

In the meantime ploughing on with getting her assessed nearer her and have told her she won't be able to stay here while we are away.

OP posts:

Shiner · 08/10/2008 11:10

If you are worried about leaving in your house whilst you are away, can you pay her rent so that she can stay in her current accommodation? It's money, but you may feel your peace of mind is worth it. I was an au pair myself once, in France, and wouldn't have expected to have been left alone in the house for so long to start with.

All the best with the decision!

Shiner · 08/10/2008 11:12

OOops, sorry, didn't read the last post saying you'd already told her she can't stay. Must pay more attention when posting!

Original poster

whooosh · 08/10/2008 11:14

I told her last night that if she passes the assessment we will help either pay her rent for the week we are away or contribute to her going back to Romania for a week (£106 on a coach in case any of you are tempted )

OP posts:

googgly · 08/10/2008 13:39

There's no way I would let her stay in the house, but if you do, make sure you've got photocopies of her passport and that kind of thing, and that she knows about it.

Original poster

whooosh · 08/10/2008 14:02

That's a good point-not sure it will allay my fears of a large Romanian lorry rolling up and filling up whilst we are away

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shellbelle2 · 08/10/2008 16:49

We have a fabulous German Au Pair who is a real advocate for Au Pairing.She tells us that she is very happy with us. I made an effort to ask the agency to supply me with the phone numbers of other families in our town with au pairs. From this list i set up a meeting with another German aupair, I went with her to meet the girl. Luckily they hit it off and are enjoying going out and about together. They are of a similar age too 18 and 19 which helps. My au pair did not wish to go to a language school as her English is superb so this was another way for her to socialise.

cheapskatemum · 09/10/2008 22:49

OMG Squiffy! Your experience is confluent with mine - our last Turkish AP came to us with driving licence. Driving Instructor took her for 2 lessons, then suggested I took her on practise school run (she drove TO the school, so no kids on board). There was no way I was going to let her drive the kids!!! 2 weeks of driving lessons & sharing lifts with neighbours later, she finally admitted to my Turkish-speaking friend that she couldn't drive.

Sorry for thread hijack. Good luck Whoosh.

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