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Original poster

BBQ-less nanny update!

32 replies

botherednanny · 27/08/2008 20:49

So... My boss agreed that dropping my hours/pay wasn't a good idea. I had a think+decided I'm going to stick it out. We both agreed that we needed to communicate with each other more etc.

I basically decided to play ball because in 16 months I'll have my NVQ3, and for all the rubbish I put up with, I'm in a really good position to study (own 1 bed flat, no bills etc)
However today, she's told me I can't adopt my friends cat. Which has annoyed me a little bit, but ah well...

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imananny · 27/08/2008 21:10

well least she isnt dropping your money/hours, though she does seem to expect high standards regarding cleaning

what you are doing is a means to an end - roll on 16mths and you will have the pick of the jobs

just be careful that she doesnt say all is ok, and then gives you a month notuce in a few weeks as she is replacing you (though illegal)

can kinda understand about the cat - it is their place and maybe she doesnt want it to small of cat pee/have carpets/walls scratched etc

Original poster
botherednanny · 27/08/2008 21:28

I'd agree with you about the pets but they had a cat (who died recently - and they are hoping to get another one) and they're getting a new dog on Saturday.

I also have a rabbit+I used to have a hamster (who died the other week)+they've never said anything about me not having any pets other than them.
I guess I shouldn't have assumed but there we go.

I'm also a little peeved because guess who is down on the Battersea Dog/Cat form as 'being able attend to the pets during the day'

ONLY 16 MONTHS!!

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AtheneNoctua · 28/08/2008 11:19

I say good for you for standing up for yourself and yet also remembering to conduct yourself professionally. Well done.

Roll on 16 months...

What if you get a snake and don't ask?

Original poster
botherednanny · 28/08/2008 17:46

Oh she has excelled herself today! I have very diplomatically said although I think it is unfair, it is fair enough about the cat+my own fault for assuming. Just to prove her point, she has emailed me a tenancy agreement dated from before I moved into the flat, just to drive home articale 2.13 about no pets without their permission.

All well+good you say but she is effectively lying to me about sending the agreement before, we both know she didn't so why be so petty?

Time to leave maybe..?

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AtheneNoctua · 28/08/2008 18:29

Erm... are their tax implications if you are a tenant rather than a live-in nanny?

BTW, is she paying out the tax for the benefit in kind which is you separate flat? Sting with that one, eh?

It's weird that way she is so agreesively defensive. It is time to go. Keep actively looking and when one comes up, take it.

squiffy · 28/08/2008 19:19

I would also innocently add into your next conversation with her that if you are a live-out nanny with a tenancy then you will of course be adhering to the Working Times Directive regarding hours, and can you please start scheduling in a lunchbreak?

She is trying to force you out whilst avoiding taking any responsibility for it.

Look for work and invest all the money you can in driving lessons.

Original poster
botherednanny · 28/08/2008 19:48

god its all a bit rubbish innit

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imananny · 28/08/2008 20:25

how petty is she to email you the tenant contract

think it def might be worth you seriously looking for another job - and learn to drive asap and then you could work in MP home, and i could come up for a swim and pimms

AtheneNoctua · 01/09/2008 11:36

So, are you going to sign this contract?

I think I would ask her if she wishes me to be her live-in nanny or her tenant because as I understand it I can't be both.

There seems to be a string of people around who have hired nannies or au pairs for the first time but don't actually understand what responsibilities come with being an employer.

If I were you I would stall that contract for as long as possible, in the nicest possible way. But, I wouldn't sign it.

Get that drivers license, girl!

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 11:59

well the weird thing is, she hasn't said anything about signing it - so that makes it a bit of a moot point does it not?

my friend who is a lettings agent said that even if she had sent me the contract before (which I am million percent sure she hasn't) its irrelevant because its not signed... and things seem to be ok, but I'm just going to keep my head down and not indulge her silly foibles.
I'm going to keep my eyes+ears open and if a good job comes up, I'm going to go for it.

but the risk is that it will be a case of out of the frying pan +into the fire... so I'm over cautious if anything...

I'm doing my best to learn to drive I am! I'm having 2 hour lessons every weekend and I'm learning for the theory every second I can - inbetween studying for my NVQ of course

my BF reckons I have too much on plate but I know where I want to be in the next 18 - 24 months and I'm not going to get there by sitting on my bum doing nothing!

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MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 12:06

she is a shocker and can you add another 30/60 minut driving lesson in, in the evening? good reducing daylight/night driving experience?

So you clean and do childcare and now pet care.

I would be seriously tempted to write up a contract of the job and present it to her in writing and email it to her twice a week.

If she terminated you have you got alternative accomodation available?

I would be tempted to slip the cat in TBH.

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 12:12

indeed...

the dog is lovely but he's made the housework really frigging difficult to do today - I'm still not 100% sure how to mop the part I'm supposed to keep him in when I go out - it has his bed+food so I'd feel like a right meanie... I'd take him for a walk while it dried but they don't want me to walk him during the day yet

I'd so smuggle the cat in but I won't put it past them to do spot checks+also my charge quite likes popping down to play with my bunny

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Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 12:13

and my driving instructor stops at 6pm during the week I think and I'm contracted til 7.30pm

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MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 12:20

piddle and bugger

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 12:25

I know

I'll get there though... my BF was really sweet, he bought me a driving theory thing for my DS so I could learn on the go bless him

I'm hoping I have a license by the time I've finished my NVQ thou!!

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MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 12:27

should see why not.

Shame NVQ is 16 not 6 months away tho

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 12:34

I know!

but in a way I'm kind of glad thou because in all of this, I really, really adore my charge so in 16 months I will have seen her through to primary school which I really want to do.

she's a really intelligent little thing who is flourishing under my care (other ppls word - not just my thoughts ) and I think I owe it to her to see her through to primary school where they can encourage her little mind.

I fear that if I leave, her mum will get someone in who is better at cleaning than me and the LO will suffer

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MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 12:46

True

It is hard to give up our wee ones.

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 13:23

It so is.

I bawled my eyes out at the end of my last position - it was only meant to be a temp 2 month one but I ended up staying for 13 months+the baby was 3 months when I started+it was all a bit emotional! Her older brother couldn't speak a word of English when I started+I really helped with that too. I visited a while ago+he now has a perfect English accent bless him.

I think my boss wants to keep me at arms length+treat me as one of her clients but isn't a nanny so much more than that?

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MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 13:46

Not to everyone

AtheneNoctua · 01/09/2008 14:07

Th epuppy is not allowed outside?!?! Go on... tell me what the reason for that is. I need to know there are crazier people in this world than ones sitting here with me at work.

MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 14:17

um ... dirty paws

AtheneNoctua · 01/09/2008 14:21

But then he shouldn/'t be allowed out ever and just not "yet". Bet they'll take him outside on the weekend.

I am seriously considering opening a nannies of crappy employers shelter.

MatNanPlus · 01/09/2008 14:28

Ah, too late for me AtheneN Maternity is much nicer tho had 3 suss sets in 6yrs tho only 1 was really bad, other were very short term jobs

Original poster
botherednanny · 01/09/2008 14:48

because they want to get him into a routine you know. They walk him in the morning+the evening+I'm not meant to take him out but I can let him in the garden every 2 hours for a wee. Oh+if I go out, I can only go out for an hour max... Is this normal behaviour? I don't know, I've never had a Dog! He's 5 years old btw

Please do open a shelter AN. God knows I need refuge!!

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