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Original poster

Nanny employer poll: How young is too young for a full time live-in nanny?

49 replies

AtheneNoctua · 01/07/2008 17:26

Kids are 3 and 5.
The hours are long (6:30-7:00, M-F) plus two night babysitting.
5 yr old is in school full time. 3 yr old will be in nursery in the afternoons (2 1/2 hrs M-F)
The job begins in September so she won't have to do summer hols. But, she will do half terms and any other unplanned days away from school.

I just ask because I'm starting to look through Greataupair for potential candidates and a few 19 year olds looked like possibilities. But, then I wondered if 19 was too young... what about 18.. 17...

What does the MN jury think?

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BecauseImWorthIt · 01/07/2008 17:29

My second nanny was straight out of college and only 18 when I employed her. She was live out though.

She was absolutely brilliant. Mature, calm and totally, totally trustworthy and responsible. But that was her and her personality, so I would guess that's your answer really - some young girls will be brilliant whereas others will be flibbertigibbets.

(Oy, why aren't you coming to the SW London meet up and book swap in August?!)

Amphibimum · 01/07/2008 17:30

depends on the person, obv.

Original poster
AtheneNoctua · 01/07/2008 18:12

Book swap???? No chance.

Is this separate from the meet-up (which I wouldn't dare miss -- unlss it's also a book swap)

OP posts:
Original poster
AtheneNoctua · 01/07/2008 18:14

Of course it depends on the person, but what is youngest fab person you would employ as a nanny.

20
19
18
17
16
15
14
13
12
11
10
9

There's a line somewhere. But, where?

OP posts:
Millarkie · 01/07/2008 18:17

We had a live out 19 year old nanny and she was great - very mature and professional. I didn't actually realise her age until after we had interviewed her and decided to employ her. On the other hand we had a 29 year old live out nanny who behaved like an emotional teenage daughter..so I guess I wouldn't be too hung up about the age.

Due you think the 'live in' part may make an older nanny more suitable?

BecauseImWorthIt · 01/07/2008 18:18

It's a book swap which is really an excuse for another meet up! (Thread in meet ups)

Sorry for hijack.

Millarkie · 01/07/2008 18:21

Well I wouldn't employ one without a driving licence so I guess that means 17 would be the absolute minimum..but then I have school age children who can tell me (or tell nanny) if something is wrong.
I would be more interested in their experience with children than their age. ie. ex-nanny used to help with brownies and church youth group.

imananny · 01/07/2008 18:39

depends if they have any quals or exp

17 seems very young but then I was a full time sole charge nanny to 4mth and 5yrs at just 18 ( but had spent 2 years at college doing NNEB)

maybe 20+ so would have had a few years hopefully of au pairing

lindseyfox · 01/07/2008 19:02

some 17 year olds are more mature than some 30 yr olds really depends on the person.

I was very mature as a young adult as had 7 younger siblings and had been through alot with a sibling dieing and other family issues so grew up very quickly.

i could make up a baby feed at 12yrs of age and change nappies from when i was 8yrs old!!!

Stars22 · 01/07/2008 20:24

I agree it depends on the person. I started a sole charge nanny job when i was 18, with a 6 month old and a 7 year old.

Original poster
AtheneNoctua · 01/07/2008 20:38

I think the hardest thing about my nanny job is the length of the day. And that isn't likely to change. I'm not really sure why I thought live-in was relevant.

I've always drawn the line at 20. But now that DS is not a toddler any more ( sniff sniff) I think the job is not quite as tiring.

I don't want an older person. I had an older nanny once and it was like having a mother in law in the house. I want someone who is young and sporty and will hang out at the gym with the kids.

Also, if she is 22 or younger her gym membership is half price. So that's another reason to keep the age down Maybe I should consider 18 or 19 to be my lower limit.

OP posts:
HarrietTheSpy · 01/07/2008 20:41

Depends on the person and what sort of experience they have. A girl who used to work at DD's nursery babysits for us - she is 19 and her childcare experience would be good enough for me to employ her. A little unreliable in other areas though - for example, cancels babysitting arrangements at the last minute (think PAAARTAY-ing! is too tempting for her at times).

I wouldn't have thought a 17 year old would have enough experience for the job you describe (either to have been through a suitable course or worked for someone for a reasonable amount of time) and I would worry about the judgement and other maturity related issues (reliablity). Whereas a 19 year old has more of a chance to meet both criteria. Particularly if you can't meet the person before they arrive (you mentioned Great Au Pair)and the references aren't UK based, I wouldn't risk a 17/18 for sole charge.

nbee84 · 01/07/2008 21:04

My first sole charge nanny job was at the age of 16 and 2 months! I have always loved children and looked after my cousins 2 little ones after school from 3.45 - 5/6pm from the age of 14, as well as lots of babysitting. I then did 3 months on a YTS in a nursery before applying for this nanny position and got it. I was a very sensible 16 year old but the employer/employee relationship was a little difficult as I was used to teachers at school and my boss was a teacher too. But I can honestly say that the children were really well cared for and I left after 2 years with a great reference.

I remember talking to my Mum a few years later and saying that it was hard to believe that I was put in charge of 2 children at that age and Mum's reply was that my boss must have been a good judge of character

23 years later and I'm still nannying!

I suppose what I am saying is that it comes down to the individual and to trust your instincts.

nannyL · 01/07/2008 21:38

at 19 year old i proxy parented for 2 weeks(with NO contact at all from parents)
a 16 week old, 5 year old and 8 year old.

nannyL · 01/07/2008 21:39

i also had a regular school pick up (my next door neighbours and the school was opposite our houses) from aged 15

id pick them up and do tea / supervise until their mum can home at 5.30ish so 2 hours

TheOriginalXENA · 01/07/2008 21:44

NannyL - NO contact and the baby was only 16wks old...

nbee84 · 01/07/2008 21:49

I didn't really count the after school care of my cousins children as sole charge nannying but it was sole charge albeit for only 1-2hrs and in the days before mobile phones.

at proxy parenting for 2 weeks with no contact. Did it pay well? I ask because I know my 1st couple of nanny jobs weren't very well paid. Once I'd built up some proper experience I felt more able to ask for better money.

littlestarschildminding · 02/07/2008 07:50

I was a part time sole charge nanny from age 16 for 4 children (twins 4 , 5 and 7).

I was reliable and responsible and perfectly capable at that age!

Just depends on the person

mummypoppins · 02/07/2008 08:25

If you want them to drive I say 21...........insurance on the car is too expensive before that age !

Original poster
AtheneNoctua · 02/07/2008 08:26

No driving involved. She gets a bus pass.

OP posts:
Anna8888 · 02/07/2008 08:32

It sounds as if you are looking for more a "big sister/cousin" than a "second mother" nanny. Which is fine - people can want quite different relationships and responsibilities for nannies.

In which case, a mature 17/18 year old is perfect.

Anna8888 · 02/07/2008 08:38

Another thought: since you are quite a directive employer, younger nannies might find that very reassuring - the older the nanny, the more likely she is to want to take autonomous decisions.

missiesparkles · 02/07/2008 08:47

I'm sorry if this offends anyone but who in their right mind would let a 16 year old look after a 16 week old baby with by themselves with absolutely no contact??!
It beggers belief really.
I'm pretty sure you're going to say you were really mature+what not but 16? Did you have any childcare experience prior to this job? Other than babysitting? You wouldn't have had a qualification no?

God, I've just read that back and it sounds really harsh. I'd just a tad shocked.

Original poster
AtheneNoctua · 02/07/2008 08:50

Yes, Anna, your second post post is very true. And certainly something I am aware of.

But, I don't think a bid sister / cousin type is really accurate. I need her to take control of a lot of organising and decision making in my absense. For example, yesterday I sent her off to organise and pay for tennis for DD in September, swimming for DS in September. camp for three days in august and to make sure DD is signed up for same class as her friend from school who has already signed up. She needs to get DD a black tights/trousers and t-shirt for a musical drama presentation on 19th July, etc. And this was all blurted out of my mouth yesterday morning as I ran out the door. I love the nanny we have now and my favourite trai of hers is that I have never had to ask her to do somethign twice. I get a report on her progress in the evening without asking for it. I wonder if a 17/18/19 year old would do this???

The role is definitely more than big sister.

OP posts:
missiesparkles · 02/07/2008 08:52

Oh ok, duh. You were 19 not 16, I'm sorry for my little rant lol, that changes things quite a bit doesn't it! I still think its a bit young for proxy parenting thou.
Just my opinion thou!

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