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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Childminder or Nursery

73 replies

mixedmama · 24/06/2008 21:10

I have a 5 month old and 2 year old who will need some sort of childcare in September.

I have always automatically favoured nursery but have no basis for that really.

If it was just a basic decision between childminder or nursery what would you go for.

OP posts:

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Bramshott · 25/06/2008 10:05

Mind you, I am lucky in that my work is flexible and I can take days off easily if the CM or her DC are ill. This is more than "paid back" by the fact that she is very flexible if I need to change my hours around or if I am late etc. She also drops DD2 back to my house at the end of the day which is a bonus!

mistlethrush · 25/06/2008 10:12

I think that you need to know that you are choosing a good provider, whichever way you go.

Ds has been at nursery since 6mo. I visited several, and was only really happy with one. He spent half of his settleing in session asleep on a cushion, so was clearly very relaxed in the atmosphere (they had cushions round the room, or a quiet room with cots for the babies). He was always happy to go to the nursery nurses, and there was always a good raport with them. He has several friends from nursery, and will be starting school with some of them in the same class which I feel will help with that transition. I've never had any problems with the nursery in any way.

In contrast, a friend had to change childminders as she found that her baby was being strapped into the car with her baby car seat forward facing - the childminder said she'd been on a course that said that this was fine - even though her child was 9mo at the time. (this was the last straw)

There are good and bad nurseries and childminders out there. I am sure my son has not had any disadvantage from being at nursery, but, if I had been able to find the right childminder, I could probably have said the same thing about that!

mistlethrush · 25/06/2008 10:19

(I should say that the toilets at the nursery are always spotless, even if you go at a nappy changing time when all nappies are being changed or lots of children having a wee; when out playing outside, I will often see one child sitting on a lap for a cuddle as they are a bit tired or under the weather - while all the rest are busy playing or having racing games etc; we regularly have a tray full of pictures to take home - with titles added, and sometimes particular features picked out (dinosaur - teeth, tongue etc) and there are lots of new pictures on the walls; there is a very low staff turnover - so ds can still say hello to people that looked after him when he was younger - and he rushes over and gives them a cuddle; and nursery staff are careful to ensure that there is good sharing, caring and that quieter children are not left out)

DaDaDa · 25/06/2008 10:30

"In contrast, a friend had to change childminders as she found that her baby was being strapped into the car with her baby car seat forward facing - the childminder said she'd been on a course that said that this was fine - even though her child was 9mo at the time"

It depends on the baby's weight, but around 9 months is often OK to change to a forward facing seat. It was for our DS.

Visit both, see which you prefer. We went for a CM and DS is very happy there - we wanted a homely atmosphere and went for a mature CM with only 2 other mindees (no school runs). Round our way there are very few nurseries that will take children under 2 years, I'm not sure why that is. If DS hadn't settled so well at the CM we probably would have sent him to a nursery next year for more interaction with other children but he's at toddler groups twice a week and the other mindees all day, so if it ain't broke...

mistlethrush · 25/06/2008 10:50

No, it was my friend's standard, rear facing, baby seat with a handle (the 'basket' variety) that are only meant to be used rear facing. The only way it had been designed to be used and securely strapped in was rear facing. If she had had a proper forward facing seat that would have been different, but children are safer rear facing for longer than that anyway.

bogie · 25/06/2008 10:53

nursery if you can find a good one my ds' is brilliant

DaDaDa · 25/06/2008 10:58

"No, it was my friend's standard, rear facing, baby seat with a handle (the 'basket' variety) that are only meant to be used rear facing."

Ah, that's bad. We had to get a new seat for DS quite early. We couldn't bear the wailing on every single car journey, and the distraction he caused was probably more of a potential danger to him than facing forward!

Ripeberry · 25/06/2008 10:59

Both my DDs were too big for the "basket" carrier by the time they were 9 months old so they went into a forward facing one.

mistlethrush · 25/06/2008 11:30

We got a new seat for ds at 9mo as he was also too big - but we got one that would rear face to start with for safety. I still think that a childminder, being handed child, strapped-in to their own basket type child seat should fix it in the only way in which such seats should be fixed ie rear facing. Its not up to a childminder to develop their own 'special' method of fixing just because they feel the child is big enough to forward face (friends child didn't meet weight guidelines for forward facing at this age anyway).

At least, with a nursery, no one was taking ds around in an incorrectly fitted seat! He did get taken out in triple buggies when the weather was nice when he was a baby, and he has also been on a trip down to the library on the bus on a quiet day in last summer's summer holiday when they had lots of staff compared to children. and, now, when they've got the right group, they sometimes take a smallish group out to play in the trees, collect leaves etc nearby.

FairyMum · 25/06/2008 11:32

Nursery for us. Safety in numbers.

Ripeberry · 25/06/2008 11:34

Reminds me of when DD1 was little. The MIL offered to look after her a couple of times and we showed her how to use the "basket" seat but each time they came back with her the seat was totally wrong and once was not even fastened!
We never asked again after that. We did all the driving.

mistlethrush · 25/06/2008 11:35

RB - yes, I am rather paranoid about seats - we use them for a purpose, and if not used properly, what's the point in having them....

Kewcumber · 25/06/2008 11:40

I wanted my DS in a home environment (for specific reasons too long to go into) so I chose a childminder who was recommended.

Choose one you like, I doubt it makes a big differnce if they are good. Each have their limitations though so just be prepared to work within them whichever you choose.

Love2bake · 25/06/2008 11:45

CHILDMINDER - definately for the youngest. I just don't agree with babies that young being in a nursery. There is no way that they get better care nursery. The baby would benefit greatly from the personal care and bond with a CM.

I would start them both with a CM and then think about moving the oldest to a nursery when he was 3. Or if he is happy and stimulated keep him where he is, as by then he will be doing play-school sessions anyway.

FairyMum · 25/06/2008 11:56

Love2bake, it depends on the CM and the number of children she looks after. My friend thought like you until she found that her baby-dd was upstairs crying herself to sleep while CM was outside in the garden with the other children she was looking after. She also put the toddler in a play pen a lot of the day. The ratio of adult:baby is actually often better in a nursery. My friend put her baby-dd into nursery where one member of staff rocked her to sleep in her arms at first settling her gently into a sleeping routine in nursery. Its often assumed that you get more personal care with a CM,but it really depends on the CM and the number of children she has to look after. She is only one person.

Love2bake · 25/06/2008 11:59

A CM can actually only have 3 under 5's (of which only 1 can be under 1), during the school day, so they should have enough time.

I know what you mean though, you are lucky to find the perfect person.

I've been in nurseries before and seen about 10 babies lined up in baby chairs, getting no attention. I would never have put my baby in one.

Original poster

mixedmama · 25/06/2008 12:02

This is all really helpful. Got to approach DH now, to see about potentially considering the CM option, altho a little worried he might say they can stay with his mum then. Would be nice for ds2 to still go to the toddler group he is familiar with and the lady i am thinking of actually tends to work closely with another minder who will have a 6 month old baby (her granddaughter) as well.

Am def going to investigate with this particular CM and speak to DH and move on from there.

OP posts:

Love2bake · 25/06/2008 12:05

Good luck MM - I hope it all work's out well for you and your family

FairyMum · 25/06/2008 12:11

"I've been in nurseries before and seen about 10 babies lined up in baby chairs, getting no attention."

I would not recommend such a nursery either.

3 under 5's and perhaps a couple of older children is actually quite a lot of children to look after for one person.

Swings and roundabouts.

Original poster

mixedmama · 25/06/2008 12:16

How far are CM willing to go to pick children up... am thinking that DS1 can still get a bit of nursery and CM could go to pick him up with DS2 and I would meet them there / on the way home. The nursery is prob about a 20 min or so walk. But I suppose they have schedules and other children to think of too. So much to think about.

What about cost, are CM more economical than nurseries?

OP posts:

Egg · 25/06/2008 12:21

I have a two-year old in nursery (2 days a week) and 5 month old DTs in nursery (1 day a week). Would not have put DTs in so early if I had not already been so happy with their care of DS1 (and wanting to remain sane played a large part too ).

I love the fact that even when four staff phoned in sick on same day, DCs still went to nursery and still received the same level of care (obv got extra staff in to cover). They are never all lined up without any attention, I often arrive and stand watching before the staff and my DCs spot me just to see how they are getting on and have never seen anything I don't like (they get more neglected when at home with me ).

They have a large outdoor area with small slides and ride in cars etc, plus an indoor sensory room which helps calm them down etc if they ever get upset. Even the DTs at such a young age get taken out to the park etc on nice days in a buggy.

I also like the fact that DS1 has lots of little "friends" and has got used to playing with other children etc.

I have not tried a childminder and am sure my DCs would be just as happy with a childminder.

Kewcumber · 25/06/2008 12:23

What about cost, are CM more economical than nurseries - around our way about £10-15 a day cheaper. I presume less of a differnce in otehr parts of the country.

Sweetpeasmum · 25/06/2008 12:48

My DS has been full time at nursery since he was 14 weeks old and loves it. He quickly formed a close bond with his key worker and, as Egg says, he gets lots of attention while he is there.

My DH and I wanted the safety in numbers option and have been delighted with the professionalism of the nurses and the standard of care DS receives, it certainly eased my return to work.

Egg · 25/06/2008 13:11

Our nursery is extortionate, because it is a "day" nursery, so children can go from 8am to 6pm (mine don't because I don't work, but they are usually there 9-5). They do give a 5% reduction for a sibling, and 10% reduction for another sibling but am sure if I sent them all to a CM it would be cheaper. However am not sure they could all go to one CM unless she had no other children as they are all 2 and under.

ScottishMummy · 25/06/2008 13:23

my preference is nursery. imo Very reliable and will book staff if someone off sick, but if CM sick you are stuffed. and lots of staff and children to bond with.

dont get bogged down in all the nursery horror stories people helpfully offer yoi could go on any news site and also find CM abuse stories too

Fortunately in reality majority of Nurseries and CM are safe and reliable

personal preference

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