Inset days

[Perfect28]

Two working teacher parents to (luckily) just one child. Child has started school this year and we are finding inset days impossible to manage. 5 per year, usual wraparound childcare is closed on insets as they mirror the school. No family less than 300 miles away, my mum has come up twice now but she won't be able to come up 5 times a year for the next however many years. As we are teachers working from home or requesting annual leave is impossible. We can take parental leave but that has to be in blocks of one week at a time so not helpful here.

Just posting in case someone has any grand ideas or suggestions I've not yet mentioned. Otherwise I guess it will have to be sick days? Not hugely helpful when I'm already managing chronic illness.

Anyone?

There are no childminders in the area, babysitters definitely would be an option but how do I find a babysitter who can do an 8 hour day? I thought babysitting was an evening thing. I also wouldn't leave him with just any random person, obviously.

Recommended websites would be appreciated!

Can you look for someone you could pay to look after your children on inset days? Maybe a retired person or another Mum, who would be happy to earn some extra cash?

Are you in/near a city? You can advertise for ad hoc babysitters on the Bubble app or Childcare.

Or ask a local nanny agency, they often have people available for ad hoc.

Exactly what I was going to say. As you are someone who doesn’t work in school holiday, people will be delighted to swap with you.
Don't be afraid of asking people.

As I've said there are challenges because of neurodiversity and also not knowing other parents well because we aren't doing pick ups/ drop offs.

It's totally not because in the vast majority of jobs you can choose when you take those weeks in order to fit around available childcare, and also you can often WFH a few days and depending on the age of the child and the nature of the job work around them occasionally.

I nearly raised objection when my children were at school as did some other parents. My children had a maths lesson with the teacher bringing in a very young child who wasn’t quiet. Fortunately it didn’t happen again.

I was feeling sympathetic until you posted about non teaching parents not having this problem. You’ve clearly got no idea of the struggles non teaching working parents have.

OP, you have said that your mother can’t keep coming down, but could you take your child up the night before? A lot of these inset days fall next to holidays or the weekend so that would help.

Babysitting is work. Of course there are people who will do it for 8 hours.

Good idea to try out a few for a shorter period.

Honestly, I wouldn’t be leaving my child with another parent for a whole day. I think that’s a lot to ask both them and their child - most play dates are a couple of hours. It puts the other parent in a potentially awkward situation of not wanting to say yes but wanting to keep relationships congenial so not quite knowing what to say!

Really, my daughter, who works full time, often swaps in the summer holidays for full days with her children’s friend’s parents.

Fair enough if they are all happy with that arrangement. But I would think that a lot to ask of another parent, especially if I didn’t know them very well.

Of course I am aware of the struggles of other parents, work as a whole needs to become much more flexible and family friendly. I'm aware that we are very fortunate that we don't have the school holiday problem.

I was responding to another poster who said that it was the same problem other parents have in the holidays to which I replied that no it's not.

I always took my DC to school with me, they loved it

@Revoltingpheasantsthank you this is also how I feel and why I think it would be awkward. At this age play dates longer than an hour and a half to two hours can go awry, and that's with both parents around. It does feel an awful lot to ask others and equally a big commitment to return the favour.

I think in KS2 that might change? But reception feels young to leave for a whole day with a school friend.

Have you also misread the post? I can't take my 5 year old with me whilst I'm teaching.

Out of curiosity why isn’t it the same?

Lots of our wrap around clubs close for the last two weeks of the summer holidays and don’t take 4 year olds at all (only 5 and above). And there isn’t any wrap around for inset days which we have to juggle on top of the school holidays.

There isn’t lots of childcare options for parents in our area so we are forced to juggle and swap kids to help each other out.

Im not saying we have it worse or better but it’s interesting that you don’t think it’s remotely similar.

I’d be interested to know when (as in decade) the people saying they took their young children into school are talking about. Because while I remember going into my Dad’s school in the 1980s and I would sit in the staff room with books and colouring etc there is no way it would be appropriate now.

My school doesn’t even have a staff room so where would my five year old be proposed to sit? Come in my lessons with me? That wouldn’t be disruptive at all

There are numerous private nanny services - surely you can contact one for ad hoc childcare?

@Springiscoming368in general, although this won't be true for all of course, people tend to make it work by staggering holiday, working from home, compressing hours, making up for lost working time or various other flexible working arrangements- none of which are available to teachers. I'm not saying teachers have it the worst by any stretch of the imagination, I don't envy healthcare workers trying to make 12 hour nightshifts work around parenting!!

What would you do then? If you can't rely on like minded parents as part of your village then who can you rely on?

In these circumstances you offer to help first and they repay the favour when you need them.

You could try the website Sitters for vetted babysitters.

Although I understand it’s difficult, you’re really going to need a support network. Start building your village.

Your school should allow you the day off unpaid if you ask? They would surely allow you to stay home if your child was sick.

It could also be worth approaching the primary school and explaining the situation. My daughter’s primary school out-of-hours provider now covers Inset days too as I think people were really struggling to cover the odd day here and there.

@Perfect28my experience is that people make it work by using all the ideas that have been suggested to you on this thread.
genuinely interested in what you feel a suitable solution would be. I appreciate it’s challenging to make friends but perhaps you could use some of the strategies that enable you to stand in front of a class of children to help build relationships with the parents of your child’s friends. Having a small group of parents that you can call upon in times of need is worth its weight in gold.