Is this normal nanny behaviour?

[henrys7thwife]

This is my first full-time, sole-charge nanny for my two-year-old. I'm not sure if the following things are 'normal' nanny behaviour, is it all acceptable or is some of it not? Any opinions at all would be welcome.

1. Taking son out to lunch occasionally (maybe once a week) and buying her own lunch on the kitty money tab.

2. Eating us out of house and home after we've done a big shop! Always seems to eat what we've prepared for that night's meal (or what the cleaners have prepared rather ). I know we provide meals on duty, but she seems to be eating an awful lot!

3. Taking naps whilst my son naps. I assume she has monitor with her during this time.

Thanks ladies!

Fair enough.

Actually though, I am quite surprised at just how long the working day is for many nannies I read about on MN - lots of nannies doing breakfast and school drop-off and then working right through to the end of the day and sometimes later. I don't know any nannies here in Paris that have early starts because parents normally drop their children at school (for 8.30 am or even 9 am) on their way to work. I appreciate that the logistics and working hours are very different in London.

Anyway, as someone who knows what it is like to be a mother at home all day with childcare/errands to do, I think that anyone who starts early and has that kind of on-the-go job really deserves a good sit down (if not a nap) middle day

Here in London I have to be at work at 7:30 so that is obviously not feasible. But, the nanny job I offer starts to get more attractive in September when DS starts school and nanny therefore gets 2 1/2 hours of no kids everyday.

But how many school drop-offs will she have to do? Personally I think going to school in the morning and then again 2 h 45 mins later is a PITA and very, very tiring...

Roll on next year when all three children will be in all day school

anna - tell me about it, i LIVE at school

some days I am there 9,12 and 3 - BUT that is why my mb has a nanny for the flexibilty and she does pay me well

hmm... so maybe the job is getting worse and not better. the nanny will take DD in the morning, DS at noon, and picck them both up at 3:15. I had thought this 2 1/2 hour break with no kids would appeal to someone who likes to work out.

def would appeal to me my little owl!!

i used to go to gym in my ex job when kids were at school&nursery. Had phone with me all the time and would do classes,go to my house, shower and then pick up

it is nice when youngest isnt at nursery every day as then can not clock watch all the time - freedom 9 - 3!!

Hi does anyone need a child minder in Ickenham, Middlesex?
Ex Nanny, Betec National Diploma in Child Care Studies, 12 years child care experience.
I live with my husband and 16 month old son.Pet and smoke free house.
Please call Hayley on 07956309287.
Thanks

Hayley, think you posted in the wrong section. This is a discussion about what is typical for a Nanny to be doing during working hours.

Try starting a new message thread, also look through the Advertising Tips thread for suggestions on where Childminders can advertise. Looks like you may be new to the board, so do introduce yourself - I'd suggest in the next CM Staff Room, this was todays Staff Room.
Hope that helps, welcome to Mumsnet

Reading all this, I'm clear that what I value in a nanny is someone who fits in with the family lifestyle. And with whom I can address these niggles without anyone feeling bad/sore afterwards. With our first nanny I was afraid to query anything in case I was perceived as a bad employer. But I've learned....

Eating out-best to agree what's acceptable. Sounds like she's an experienced nanny with a routine of her own. (I had a 'nanny who lunched' once, and she had expectations and expediture that were shall we say 'non-aligned').I prefer the nice meals out to be en famille at the weekends. 2 year old-would expect nanny to share food , just like we do, with an extra plate , and bring milk (like AtheneNoctua I'm not mad about the quality of bought food)but she may just have not known what to do.

Food in fridge: we ask our nanny what she wants to eat and buy accordingly. She eats lunch with baby, so is encouraged to cook things that she can eat with her.

Naps: she's entitled to a break, if she wants to spend it napping that's up to her. Would rather she had a break and was rested.If we have to have a long stay, I almost without exception arrange a late start for her the next day, but I do work flexibly.

LOL at "nanny who lunched" .

I'm not very enthusiastic about the quality of childcare here in Paris, but at least the nannies don't expect to have an entertainment budget .

I think you should let your nanny do the kind of things you do. So if you don't go out for lunch with the kids because it's too expensive for you, then it's OK to say that she shouldn't. It's just as sociable to meet up with other kids and nannies in the playground as at Pizza Express. Or tell her that once a week is OK or something, so you know what's planned.

I got cross with our live-in ap for eating everything in the fridge. It's not that something's off limits, just that I think it's completely inconsiderate of her to think that if I buy 30 yoghurts on Sunday, it's OK for her to eat 10 of them on Monday and 10 on Tuesday. I told her to take into account that there are a lot of people in the house. I also don't think you should have to buy her fillet steak for lunch just because you and dh are going to have it for dinner.

Having a nap on a 12 hour shift seems reasonable, as long as she can hear if something happens.

1. absolutely fine and completely normal. you can expcet to pay for anything your nanny does with your child during ehr duties, including meals / entry fees / ice lollies / drinks at cafe etc
   (and my bosses pay for me to go out to pizza express for lunch with my nanny friends and there charges etc)

2. what do you mena by eats loads? although im a daily nanny i eat all 3 of my meals at the house and have snacks etc whenever i feel like. I ONLY ever eat whatthe chidlren eat though, so its always just 1 extra portion od what is being eaten anyway.... the only exception is that i eat normal yogurtsand the chidlren have kids ones. Also my bosses by my ear grey tea especaly for me, and very often come back with food they know I like (cinnamon and raisen bagels yum yum )

3. a bit more debatable.... does she actually sleep (i would be quite surprised if she did that every day actually) and no i dont think its generally acceptable.... BUT if all the nursary duties are done and the childs asleep then no problem with her having a cup if tea on the sofa (as do daily) and on rare occasions (for eg when i have had a heavy cold) then i have had a mini nap on the sofa too, but its by no means normal for me to sleep during the day!

obviously the nanny needs to eat whilst there, maybe have a shelf of food that she can eat so she knows.

also if she is taking your son out for lunch then she should be paying for her lunch with your money also - this is good for children to eat out occasionally as it develops social skills and improves table manner (as long as its not MC donalds!!)

Taking a nap when your son does it taking the mikey a little, even when i proxy parent and may have been up all night with a baby i dont take a nap during the day. very very cheeky