Should children go to nursery?

[hippygirllucky]

My daughter is currently looked after by her grandparents while my husband and I work. I'm beginning to wonder whether she would benefit from nursery, and whether she will be at a disadvantage when she reaches school if she hasn't attended nursery? In terms of not having had a structured beginning to education?

How old is she and are you planning to put her into preschool the year before she starts reception or not. I think preschool is a good idea before school and even just a few sessions a week would benefit her. Under three though good grandparent care is fabulous so if they play with her and take her out to experience stuff then great. Also she will be building up a lovely bond with people who will hopefully remain in her life for a long time.

@Violet1988 thanks! She's only 15 months but nursery places are competitive around here so realistically I need to start looking soon if I want a place for her when she's 2.5/3.

Mine didn't go to nursery until the pre-school funding started, then they did 5 afternoons per week. (Afternoons suited us better, there was also a morning session)

None of mine went to nursery at all. People do find it odd though

If grandparents are willing to do wrap around and holiday care, a school based preschool could work very well for you.

There isn't a definitive answer whether family or paid childcare is better. Depends what the grandparents do with them really! Just at home all the time will be different to play groups and museums and playing with other children. It could be very hard to go from no groups to school with no preparation.

I think it there are benefits to it including them being apart from their immediate family before the longer school day. Half a day is a good easing in.

When I taught Reception you could often tell the children who hadn't been to a preschool (perhaps not as good at sitting and listening, found it harder to share toys, could get overwhelmed by the busyness and noise) but there were children like this who did go to preschool and nursery, and children who didn't who were absolutely fine. It completely depends on the child, the interactions they've had.

You know your children and the care they're being given and if you feel that it's what works for them then that's fine. They all generally get used to it after a month or so anyway, whatever previous childcare they've had.

There are some benefits for 3-4 year olds to going to a pre school or nursery .It needn't be full time. Prior to that it depends on your family circumstances and what works best for you all.

Mine did the nursery class at the local primary at age 3 (3 hours in the morning, Monday - Friday, so free because it was the 15 hours all children are entitled too).
Before that we did playgroups, singing at the library, playing in the park etc.
Under 3s don't 'need' nursery - they need some activities which will give them interaction, friendships, a bit of independence.

Agree with everyone else - post age 3, some half days are good but the standard of the nursery matters too, if they don’t have any sitting and listening and are all free flow/you choose it’s not going to help much for school. My kids do indeed hate noise and sharing and they went to nursery from the end of mat leave.

I think preschool the academic year before school is great. Helps them get used to being away from family/in big groups with other kids/listening to teachers and following instructions and practice at being independent with eating and going to the toilet which is all really good prep for school.

I'm a sahm so my children technically didn't need to go to nursery for child care reasons, however I do feel they definitely did benefit from going. My oldest (in reception at primary) and my middle child (3 years) started off doing 2 afternoons a week from September just before they turned 3 until December and then 15 hours in January when they got funded hours. My oldest did 18hours, three full days, in her last year before going to school.

I think preschool can be really beneficial. I'd look for school attached ones or those that only offer preschool hours (assuming your parents are happy to do drop off)

They are more likely to let you use the funded hour for a full session and with less 'add ons'

There are huge benefits for children in attending a nursery or pre school sessions a few times a week from around 2.5/3.

Children who have never attended a formal setting do stand out and have more to catch up on when they start nursery.

My DS starts nursery in August this year, he'll have just turned 3. He's going for 4 mornings a week for socialisation. All of my friends DC are now at secondary school so he hasn't had much interaction with kids his own age. We go to some classes and softplay etc. but everyone does their own thing there. I want to make sure he's happy and confident spending time with people outside of the family and can navigate social situations before starting school.

It's good for them to get some social interaction definitely. And being cared for by grandparents may not involve a lot of play dates with other parents and children. Definitely get her into the half days preschool that local authorities offer (which you can't usually apply for until the autumn before she works start, aged 3) Private nursery before that is more optional. What do the grandparents think? Are there any playgroup type options around which could be cheaper and serve a similar function?

In your shoes I'd get her name down for a nursery just for when the funded hours kick in. Maybe a school nursery or other term-time only nursery. If grandparents happy to continue to care around those hours. I'd definitely say my DD has really benefited from going to preschool, before then meh not sure, I don't think she's been disadvantaged by going early (was necessary for work) but I'm not sure she's benefited from it particularly either iyswim, not in any tangible way anyway.

As a pp said, you could ask the GPs to take her to preschool for a few mornings a week. They might be happy to have that break themselves and your DD would get the exposure to an institutional setting before she starts school.

We sent our daughter to nursery for two afternoons a week for six months before she started school, just to get her used to the routine of being in a formal education setting. In hindsight, she was old enough by that time to understand that she had to go to school when she was almost five, so I'm not sure she really benefitted from going to nursery. I stayed at home with my daughter but if I'd been working, I would much rather have had my mum looking after her than sending her to a nursery.

Before I became a stay at home mum my mother provided childcare. This included going to toddler groups and structured classes so I felt it was the best of both worlds. No plans for nursery until pre-school at 4.

Sahm so no need for childcare but I sent mine to playgroup at 2 where they did 2 hour session without me twice a week. Then preschool nursery 5 mornings a week at 3 to get them into the routine of going somewhere every day like school would be. I believe there are benefits, sharing toys that belong to no one in particular, being given instructions from other adults, interacting with other children and group activities.

The main reason mine went was they had a lot of fun there while I did the non fun things like cleaning and doctors appointments.

I think preschool at a primary the year before reception is fine and i'd prefer family care tbh.

Your dd would maybe benefit from playgroups there are tonnes of low cost ones with churches perhaps consider that instead?

I was a SAHM so I didn’t send mine to nursery/pre-school as much as others did. In the year before they started school I sent them 2/3 morning sessions per week to the pre-school attached to the Primary School. It was a gentle transition towards school - they got used to being in a classroom with other children, sitting down as a group and following Teachers instructions etc. I didn’t feel the need to send them more. I spent time teaching them phonics/numbers/colours etc and doing art & crafts and reading at home, so I don’t feel like they missed out on anything. And were totally ready for starting school.

Part of it will depend on what sort of activities she is doing with her grandparents. Are they taking her to activities/classes so that she is used to being with other children and getting used to rules etc?
If she is getting that type of socialisation, then a time in pre-school or school nursery for the year before reception will be fine.
If she is just with her grandparents all the time, then earlier nursery experience may be useful.