Is 12 too young to be home alone

[Moana10]

Hi all,
My son is 12 and very sensible. I work 6 hour shifts. My sister used to look after him until recently but she is now severely disabled and unable to care for him. I have no one else available to help.
Would you leave your 12 year old for 6 hours?
I cant help feel uneasy about it but I know I can mummy him too much (so I'm told) some people I know leave their 12 year olds.
My shift is 8 am till 2 pm. It takes me 10 mins in travel one way.
Opinions please?
Thanks for reading 😊

*Is there a legal age until when the kid can be left home alone?

i wouldn’t personally but because of personal experience my sister left the son home (single mom) after school around similar age so around 12 not yet 13, until she gets back home from work (around 6pm). The theft tried to break into the house by knocking the door and threatened him if not opening, during that hour knowing only the kid will be home. Luckily he called the mom and mom called the police, so nothing happened. But she got a fine for it. (In Australia).*

This is a UK site. You would not receive a fine OP.

Its perfectly fine. My DS is 12 now but was also left on occasion for 3 or 4 hours at 11. Social services won't give a shiny shit unless there are other things going on as well.

I would leave during the day at 12 if they know what to do and could cope in an emergency, and if they are able to understand and follow the safety rules you set.

@SchnauzerEyebrows I can assure you SS would not bat an eyelid at a sensible 11yo being left for a period of time. Time is more than filled up with children and families that genuinely do need help!!

Yes they would. My neighbour was investigated for leaving her then-11yr old alone twice a week to go on dates! I witnessed it

Of course they wouldn't.
Social services have far more to do than check on secondary school students in their own house.

My daughter is 12 and I work full time so she is often home alone. She has an inset day tomorrow where the rest of us are back to work/school so she will be here alone from 7am til her brother's get home from school around 4pm. I don't really have any choice!

Please see my above post!

Do me a favour. They really wouldn’t. I wouldn’t do it with a year 6 11 year old but by year 7 is 100% fine and even year 6 I seriously doubt social services would even registe it

@SchnauzerEyebrows then there must have been other things at play as well because a tween alone for a short one is not in our remit.

Social services will investigate if a complaint is made it doesn't mean anything actually comes of it. Also leaving an 11 year old to go on a date presumably at night is completely different to leaving them to go to work in the middle of the day.

What on earth do you think secondary kids are doing in school holidays if both parents work?!

Well going on dates is a bit different to being at work. Dates in the day or at night?

Secondary children have been left at home for as long as I've had dc , 27, 19,11,10 because there's not the childcare out there for them

Obviously depends on the child, how they feel and how sensible they are but the majority of people are not going to get any calls from ss because a 12 year old is at home in the day on their own

I leave my 13 year old home alone. Longest was about 8 hours I think. It’s down to the child. If you feel he’s sensible enough and he can contact you in an emergency I’d say absolutely fine

At 12, I really think it's no problem. It's mainly on the weekends that's the problem that OP isn't home, since most of time it falls into school hours.
Sensible child should understand and know well enough at this age.

No, I wouldn't. Just no.

Yes definitely by 12. He loves it.
Maybe at 10

Now is left during holidays if doesn’t want to do clubs.
Is good at replying to messages. Know some neighbours. Has been cooking simple things and making hot drinks for a few years but follows the agreement not to when alone.

I’d make sure there’s some nice snacks in 🙂

I had a visit from social services when I left my 11 year old for twenty minutes to pick up my younger child from a club. Literally!

It was the first time I left them and they were absolutely fine when I got back except the next day they told the school they were scared.

Omg. Everyone I know leaves Yr6 kids alone for an hour or two here there & everywhere. They might get 'scared' for a few mins but SS ?!??

You had a visit because your child told school they were scared and school is duty bound to report this. You did not ave a visit because you left your child for 20 minutes.

My two are 11 nearly 12 and 13. I could leave them for that long. They’d make toasties and sandwiches for lunch. They know what’s in the pantry, both have phones. I’d go in and tell them I’m off, so they know.

@SchnauzerEyebrows don’t be ridiculous. My friend is a (very senior) social worker and leaves her 12 year old alone for several hours and has been doing so since he was 11.

Absolutely fine. A lot of children his age will spend that amount of time and longer on their own during the school holidays if parents are out at work.

I've witnessed it myself! I'm not being 'ridiculous' ffs

@SchnauzerEyebrows how did social services become involved? What was the outcome? Was it really just a couple of hours or was your friend staying out all night?

Look, my son goes to a school where some of the children travel from up to 40 miles away, negotiating public transport in London from the age of 11. Do you think that social
services become involved with them?!!!

Lots of children are left alone in the U.K. once they go to secondary school at 11. It’s completely normal.