Terminating Childminder with zero notice - advice please! 3

[Justamumm]

Hi there, please please can anyone help with how to write my termination of childminding contract with immediate effect?
A bit of the back story, my son started in April 22, it's his first CM as I was returning to work from being made redundant in lockdown. When starting I advised I will be in receipt of UC and the dates I would be paid and all was agreed. Since then every month my childminder calls me mid month or messages me demanding I pay what's owing to her and I am "having her off" to which I have to advise I would never and I appreciate the bill is getting higher but I always clear it when I pay on the 18th just like anywhere I jut put it down to her worrying over money.
There has been other issues my son had an incident of biting a month ago and she rang me to pick him up immediately, I did as I was worried but as I was on the way to collect him she rang me again saying another child had injured my son and I need to get him now (it was all very erratic she was screaming as I was driving to collect my son) Just to note my son had never bitten before and had done it through a blanket he came out of her house covered in blood and she refused him entry the next day.
Following on I had covid recently and was home from work but still sending my son to her as I was paying and he was negative. She continuously rang me to collect him that week as she knew I was home but once again I am still paying for every day.
I am just at my wits end as far as I'm concerned I am well within my rights to end the contract with immediate effect I cannot cope with the just chaos of it any longer. I appreciate I am supposed to give 4 weeks notice but as she's threatened me many times with terminating the contact for breach of policy I feel I am within my rights to.
Please can anyone help on what to say or just any advice. Thank you

Is 4 weeks in your contract?
You'd probably have to pay the 4 weeks but obv just not take him.

'Hi, please take this as termination of my contract for X. He will not be in your setting from today.
Payment will follow on normal payment date'

Hi there, yes it is in the contract so I get where your coming from. I will think on it I have a nursery owner meeting with me later to advise.

Just to note today she has sent me 15 messages about my son pictures and everything I have been civil and nice and replied but not "overly best friendly" as I have just replied like this she has turned on me again and is now demanding we have a face to face meeting tonight when my children are in bed to discuss my outstanding fees.

My fees are just my bill it's my months bill that I pay on a certain date every month!

Surely the level of professionalness is a breach in the own contract? Thanks

You would need to check the contract to know if she is actually in breach of any of the clauses. What are the payment terms, are you meant to pay it once a month on the 18th or are you actually in arrears for the whole month until the 18th? (I appreciate there's nothing you can do about it, since that's when your money comes in, but she may be within her rights to chase it from, say, the 2nd of the month if that's when the contract says it falls due).

I would write as @HSKAT suggests - you need to call time on this as it's impossible. But unless she's actually breached the contract, I think you will need to give her four weeks' notice. Obviously you don't need to agree to a face-to-face meeting, and in fact putting in writing your offer to pay as usual on the 18th will be helpful.

So what is outstanding if it's your bill she's on about?
Did you discuss and agree to pay on the 18th?
Is it meant to be due on the 1st of the month?

What is it your son has today?

I wouldn't even have the meeting, cancel contract and advise when payment will be made for the 4 weeks.
Her messaging about your son and asking for payment isn't a breach tbh. ESP if she is actually chasing and your unable to pay until the 18th. You'll have to clarify this as I don't understand why she'd be chasing if it wasn't a late payment.

Hi there, so the contract there is no payment date all I can provide is a bank statement/screenshot showing that I have always paid on the 18th. The thing is she's not chasing it she's accusing me of not paying and having her off etc then she calms down it's just erratic.

I have the contract her and it states the following:
"This contract may be ended immediately by either of us giving notice to the other if the other: fails to perform or is breach of any of it's main obligations or duties, or is in persistent or material breach of any of its minor obligations"

which the thing is it's not just the harassing me, but it's the constant checking if I am in work and asking to pick my son up early.

She takes him to other childminders houses without me knowing which I accept going out but she takes him in someone's home is that okay?

And when the incident came where my son bit another child her friend was in the house? Is this normal? Am I being soft? Like from what I gathered she was in another room when this happened with my son?

Please if it's me tell me but I feel broken at the minute with the stress I wanted someone to love my boy and treat him like their own. Thanks

regardless of the contract surely there are rules childminders must adhere too?

It's just my bill I last paid on 18th of July so my next pay date is 18th August. It's literally my bill the month after I don't understand how else to explain it.

When i started with her she agreed i could pay in arrears as I was starting a new job and would receive help from universal. She was fine with this as when you start a new job the don't pay you in advance you work then get paid

If you feel strongly about not paying because you don't believe your child is safe and well looked after I would put that in writing and explain why you feel she has breached the contact.

You shouldn't have to pay if she isn't sticking to her end of the deal which is to provide high quality childcare and a safe loving environment for your child. And if she is also regularly calling you to collect early without good reason.

I would also withdraw my child immediately in this situation, she sounds erratic and unprofessional.

Ok understand the bill now.

Give notice for immediate effect.

I wouldn't be happy about her friends being over and them being in another room and going to another CM tbh.

She's basically having your son for afew hours and getting you to pick him up for one reason or another.

The thing about me not paying 4 weeks is because I am having to remove him because of her that money will be paying for him to be somewhere else if that makes sense.

Please don't think this is me trying to get some cash I am a mum just trying to get her career back on track last thing I ever wanted was for my baby boy to be here there and everywhere in childcare.

If I pay the 4 weeks notice he will have to stay with her and she's just not doing her job properly I dread to think what she will be like in those 4 weeks

He's there today and I am sick with worry not that she would harm him I am not being this dramatic woman it's just how erratic she behaves it's sending me through a loop. Thank you for all your help x

If you think she's going to harm your child go and get him now and call the police and social services.

She sounds awful!

Take your child out and do not pay. She can fight you for it if she wants to, but it’s unlikely that she will and she wouldn’t win.

I’d also report her to OFSTED for the screaming at you while you were driving and she was in charge of her mindees.

I wouldn't be letting a woman like that care for my kids, she sounds deranged. I would go collect him, give my notice and not pay her except for the work she has done. Id tell her i feel she hasn't cared for your child properly and has created more work for you by the constant harassment and messages and you will no longer be requiring her services.

Also i would be questioning whether all that blood was really from another kid. Id contact ofsted

You can terminate the contract immediately due to breach of contract if you feel she hads done broken the terms in some way.
However although I.completely understand your situation re payments (I am a cm myself and my parents pay at various dates across the month to coincide with their UC dates), technically you'll be the one in breach of your contract if she's set a payment date and you're paying later than this.
However her behaviour does sound erratic and I can understand why you want to take him out of her care.
You have 3 choices here. Give 4 weeks notice and keep sending him. Give notice and pay but don't send him. Or give immediate notice and let her know you'll pay for the care used only. She may accept this or she may fight for the notice period payment, if she does fight it you'll probably have to pay it but if you offer a payment plan (and stick to it) then you it should be easier for you to manage at least

The blood was my son's more detail of that incident:

It was when it was the hottest day of the year (to note my son is albino and as any toddler the weather effects him)

He was cranky that day and she kept messaging me saying he was (once again I am at work) next thing I get a call saying he has bitten a child I must get him immediately (after this is realised he should never have been asked to leave for biting)

a few minutes later she called me again (so a separate incident) saying the child who my son had bit had grabbed him and cut his ear, this was when her friend was there.

So when i picked my son up he had blood all over him all over his ear it was just unreal and she said without thinking "my friends here and couldn't believe what she heard" which makes me think she was in another room both times as why was the other child able to grab my son with such force to cut his ear when she was there?

In hindsight we should have left then it's just not that easy is it. Thanks

Can you check with UC , I think what they call it is a Childcare Run On, where they can cover the cost of changing over. Good luck, I had a similar awful experience.

Hi MarchingOnTogether thank you, I really don't want it to seem like I am trying to screw this woman over I have paid on the 18th of the month (if it's a weekend earlier) every month it's the same date every month so by the week or two before yes the weeks start adding up for my bill but that's standard in any setting unless I pay weekly surely?

Tbh it sounds like she might be happier not having him for whatever reason, even if only so she can get another child in his place whose parent will pay on 1st, so go along to the meeting, reiterate your conversation at the start about paying in arrears (she may have thought you only meant the first month?), explain how the calls and early pick ups are not what you were expecting from a childcare setting and then ask her what she wants from you, as you cannot pay before 18th each month, as you thought you’d agreed with her before you started.

When you pay on 18th each month are you paying for previous four weeks or in advance? Most would expect the latter , as will nurseries etc. Going into others' homes or having non cm round is not usual.

I think the most important thing is to find your son a new placement. Then give 1 months notice. If you don't have much money you will probably have to send him in during notice month. Do not agree to collect early as she is being paid for caring for him.

she's threatened me many times with terminating the contact for breach of policy

It sounds like she will do this again when you speak to her tonight. So accept her threat and say ‘very well, as you are giving me notice, I am willing to waive the four weeks notice period’.

Then leave immediately, do not be drawn into any further discussion. Follow up with an email confirmation and payment to date.

Thank you, I have found my son a placement I was planning on him staying the 4 weeks but I have moved him forward it's a school nursery.

Once again I am not trying to screw her out of money but I am having to remove him due to her actions that's literally it.

I was planning on him attending this week and giving her the written notice Friday but after today and her once again sending numerous messages then changing her emotional approach towards me I will be keeping him off tomorrow and sending the letter tomorrow.

|if she wishes to take me to court I will fight her there if I lose so be it and I will pay

Many Thanks for all your help x