Police checking au pairs with out agency??

[granarybeck]

We have interviewed an au pair today, seemed very nice. I am just having a dilemma as I don't know how to obtain police checks (or equivalent) as not going through an agency. Do CRB checks not take about 12 weeks, and do they cover outside UK anyway?

I know I am thinking more about this as it is a male au pair, which I know is extremely bad of me. He seemed very kind, he is 25 which again for absolutely no justifiable reason makes me think I should have checks etc more than if he was 19. I think I am fretting more as actually feel so guilty for even having these thoughts. I think it was just the reality of meeting someone in person that I would be leaving my dcs (and sharing the house with) that I didn't know anything about.

I would really appreciate any advice or opinions please.

They can get a police check in their country which is the best way forward if they have lived there until recently.

We employed a Czech male au pair and he rpovided the relevant paperwork which was done in Czech and English by his local police.

Was done quickly as well, I think within a fortnight as I stipulated no police check no job with us.

Do you think he could do it whilst in this country? He said he had some checks for convictions by British Embassy to get his visa.

How was he has an au pair?

He still lived in Czech Republic. He went to local police office who organised the searches and then faxed documents to me and posted originals as well.

I suppose he could do this from here. It will probably mean a few phone calls and perhaps letters plus a bit of money for the fees but no big deal.

If he needs a visa than no European national?

what sort of visa? To study or work?

He'd come on an au pair visa last november but no longer needs one as now part of EU. I that was what he said.

In that case I would wangt references from the families he has worked for as well. Preferably, I'd telephone them.

Were you thinking of employing him and then sorting out the paperwork?

I've spoken on the phone to his current employer, who spoke very highly of him. I guess you never really know who you are talking to, but she seemed very genuine.

If you have and doubts at all, I would listen to them.

I don't to be honest about him in particular. I'm just having a general panic!

Anyone else got any advice about being able to feel confident/secure in choosing an au pair?

Or any experience of male au pairs?

Under the current system it is not possible as a domestic employer to CRB check an au pair unless you go via an agency.

Hi Granary...Me again ..
You probably don't want to know this but I had a bad experience with a male german au pair this summer!
Don't get me wrong was a very nice boy, but absolutely useless! He was fun with the kids and they really liked him but I could not get over his lack of life experience. I spent weeks tryng to teach him, how to cook something, wash his clothes, tidy up..He just didn't get it! Nor did he want to tbh! In the end I could not trust him to look after my ds's on his own. I left him for one day and I came home, they were safe which is saying something I guess, but not fed, house was a tip, they were running round like lunatics!
Luckily He was only a summer AP, and I'm a freelancer so took time off, but I resented him totally by the end.
However, I have a friend who adores her German MAP...she is much more laid back than me though..
What I will say from having 2 Czech girls (I'm on my 3rd now) is that C R is still a very traditional culture, men aren't usually expected to do housework. As your has previous exp. as an AP this isn't a problem but I wouldn't take a male without exp. again.! Who am I kidding I wouldn't take a male again!!!!!!!!!

Hi Ingles, I'd rather have honest experience. His current employer says he does above and beyond housework wise, does ironing, cooks etc. He is 25 so maybe that helps. I am going to try and speak to the British embassy in Romania to see if I can check his police check. I just really can't decide if its worth all the worry! or whether its easier jus stressing about getting back to the after school club.

Granary..is he Romanian not Czech???????
If so...sweeping statement.....I would be very careful!!!
Everyone I know with AP's from Romania have had problems, usually around money and being treated like servants!! (they're not!) Even my agency have told me they've had so many problems that they've banned all R AP's from discussing money!
On the plus side there is a huge difference between a 19 year old and a 25 year old..So if he's so great why are the other family letting him go?

The mum works for easyjet and had been working night or long shifts, but now her turn has come up to do day shifts, i think. As her children are having to share a room to make space for the au pair, she has doesn't need to keep him enough to give up spare room. The son has autism so I think settles easier in own room too. It sounded genuine but i guess you just never know.

When you say about money, do you mean they always hint/ask for more money, and claim they are being treated like a servant?

Sorry, meant to add, yes he is romanian.

well that sounds fair enough..
I've mentioned a romanian girl on this board before...she came to us with a provisional driving license..anyway she walked out on the family before us because once she started talking to other AP's she decided they weren't paying her enough money and they were treating her like a slave...it turns out (again she didn't mention it) they were spending a fortune on driving lessons for her. A friend tried a R Male AP who left shouting that he wasn't some (racist comment!) who should be expected to do menial tasks..ie the hoovering! Obviously they are not all like this before I upset anyone, BUT Romania has only just joined the EU..I think it's taking them time to understand that there's no pots of gold in this country! They are also very upfront! Never mind hints more like demands....
Did this family get the AP through an agency? Did he register with an agency? If so he should have a police check, medical certificate & 3 checkable references. TBH I probably wouldn't take him without...not that it really means anyting at the end of the day after all my German MAP had fantastic references!!!!!

He came through an agency last Nov to a family, who didn't work, he left to go to this family as they didn't pay him each week (they were receiving benefits) and made him work every day for more than 5 hours (I think he did mention 'treated like a slave' which is why I was curious about your comments!)

Do you Know what G...I'm not surprised he used that phrase..Honestly... my agency says it's really common!
I would contact his agency and find out what happened from their point of view...I would also ask him to supply his RPCheck..he must of had one, because of their new EU Status all the paperwork has to be really thorough.

Hang on a minute..Didn't Romania join EU in January? Did he come with a visa?

He came on an au pair visa last november but then since this January he doesn't need one.

I might email him and ask if he's got the police checks he had for the initial agency, latest job was through aupair site. I just don't want to get his hopes up if we aren't going to take him.

Are you using an au pair at the moment?

This is ringing alarm bells for me G...If the problem was the family in his first placement surely the agency would have found him another family? Speak to the agency before you do anything else...do you know which one?
I've got a Czech girl at the mo who generally is doing great! She's older too, 24 and she's starting an NVQ2 in childcare tomorrow which means she's very keen. Mind you I had words with her this morning cos she went out 8am Sat morn and didn't come back till 10pm last night, didn't mention she'd be away all weekend. Course there's me thinking she's had an accident, worrying about her driving in the fog! She was really surprised when I told her I was worried and it was thoughtless not to let me know she was safe!....Would you expect AP's to let you know? or is this just me being a worry pants?

Thanks Ingles, I think you're right, we're going to have to say no.

Yes I would have worried. I'd given examples like this to dh to think about impact of having au pair live with us, I'd asked him what we would do if she didn't come home one night, he said nothing, I said worry! I think its natural to be concerned for someone living or working for you.

My dh has wondered what I'm whittering on about all weekend. His idea is that she's an adult, has time off and can do what she likes...AP agrees. She can do what she likes... as long as I know she's ok.
Anyway back to your AP dilemma...why don't you put a post up here ? Someone might know of someone...

LOL Ingles2 . I had the same with my 3rd Au aupair. Went out 7pm Friday night and came back 7am Monday morning to start work.

DH didnt understand my concern but she was in our car.............which is of course registered to me and I had no idea where she was !!

She only did it once and then let us know in advance if she was going to be away!

The au pair game is a lottery..........my best one was German and she was like having a Norland nanny. I then had another German one ( female ) who lived like a slob........I would come home and find the children had been in their pyjamas watching TV all day ! She was 25 and useless.