Childminder v nursery

[MissB83]

I'm looking for some insights on childcare options.

I am moving house soon and will need to put my DS (1) into day care for 2 days a week. I have arranged to work shorter days from home on those days so he would need to be in from around 8/8:30 to 4/4:30. Looking at options there seem to be a few nice child minders locally and my DS is quite an intense personality who enjoys bonding with one person. I had assumed I would send him to nursery but it would be similar cost wise to do a childminder.

Can anyone advise on the positives/negatives of nursery v a childminder?

Depends on the child. DC1 I did look at childminders but went to nursery. DC2 I hadn't planned to look at childminders, but didn't settle well at nursery and loved childminders now.

Bumblebee39 do you know why your DC2 did better with the childminder?

Just his personality. He is quite gentle natured and a homebody, who likes his routine. He doesn't like big noises or chaos, but is generally quite jolly wherever he is. I think he just got lost in the bigger group, whereas in a smaller group he gets noticed more. He's a little bit delayed with speech and needs someone to pick up on and reinforce the little things he achieves with talking. I don't think they could even hear him at nursery over the clamour of other kids who were much more confident singing/shouting/chatting.

DC1 was a chatterbox so nursery suited her fine

Visit a few of both. See what seems best for your child. Both follow the same EYFS curriculum and are both inspected by Ofsted.

I went for a nursery simply because I have colleagues who have to take days off when their childminder is ill to look after their little ones. At least at a nursery they have more staff.
But on the flip side as a child I went to a childminder and we are still in touch now! She’s a fab woman and was a huge part of my childhood.

For a variety of unconnected reasons, I ended up using a few CMers over many, many years (3dc), and none of them ever took time off, so I wouldn't put too much weight on the 'there is another member of staff to look after them when they are off sick'.
Ultimately it is personal preference. There are great Nurseries and great CMers and really crap Nurseries and I presume there must also be poor CMers, most of course will be in between.
For me, I wanted as close to a home environment as possible - for my dc to be doing all I would have done with them if I hadn't been at work, which is why I went for CMers.
I like the fact they went out and about all the time, and weren't confined to the one room all day in a Nursery. They used to go to the park, to the post office or a shop, just walk along roads as you would - seeing all the stuff you see when you get out and about. They can adjust the day better - say if your little one is feeling under the weather, and be more flexible about taking them when they are under the weather.

I used childminders. They were never sick but I had paid dependants leave in my job anyway so it wouldn’t have been an issue if they ever were.

We went for a nursery as they don’t close for staff sickness and holidays. We are fortunate however that our nursery is small, 6 in the baby room, 6-8 in the toddler room and 15 or so in the ‘big’ room. So DS was never lost in the crowd - a ratio of 1:3 with 2 staff and 6 babies is very very different to 6 staff and 18 babies! We saw his speech accelerate dramatically when he went from the baby to the toddler room and now he’s in the big room he’s able to join activities at the levels he wants to and has a group of friends his age while interacting with some of the older children too. It works brilliantly for us.

My DS found nursery too overwhelming. Baby room has 12-15 kids plus the adults. It was too much for him. I'd pick him up with his eyes swallen due to how much he'd cried. We moved him to a childminders with 2 more kids same age and within two weeks he wasn't even waving bye to me anymore. He just completely came out of his shell. He's been there over a year now and For us it was the best of moves. It does depend on your child though

Depends on a number of factors - I didn’t like the nurseries near me and did love thechildminder so went for that but there are pros and cons with both.
Bear in mind that although nurseries don’t close for staff sickness, in my experience they have a much lower threshold for child sickness so you might end up with the same number of last minute days off anyway. if your dc has a bit of a sniffle they might be sent home from a nursery however my childminder has always used much more sensible disgression over whether a child is really ill!

I’m sure most childminders are lovely people but I just wouldn’t trust any one person I didn’t know to look after my baby.

I looked at a few nurseries and really hated a couple. We choose a small family-run nursery. A couple of the staff had gone to the nursery themselves as children. It just felt right when I went there and it was perfect for our boy so I would say go with your gut instinct.

We went for a child minder as it fitted better with our needs, however I have come to love the fact that the kids are in a home environment, especially when starting at only 1 year old, their close connection with the CM, and they've both really enjoyed mixing with kids of a range of ages. We haven't had a problems with illness, our CMs have been very pragmatic when the kids have been a bit under the weather but not ill if you know what I mean, and we have been lucky that our CMs have both been very flexible and helpful when we've needed additional care for the kids. Our first CM sadly retired last summer but we've had some play dates with her and some of the other kids that attended. Our experience has been all positive.

I’m sure most childminders are lovely people but I just wouldn’t trust any one person I didn’t know to look after my baby.

Why would you trust random nursery staff more?

When I had CMs I saw personal references and CRB checks for them, the latter for their partner as well.

I've used both and both were great. CM had the advantage of a closer relationship, and my DSs had a lovely friendship with her DC, but when her DC were ill I had to find alternative childcare which was difficult on occasion.

Nursery broadened their social skills, and they were able to have a broader choice in friendship forming.

Also, the nursery had a large proportion of children going to the same primary school and as a result they settled into school so very easily and smoothly.

On the whole, from around 2 1/2 years old I think I prefer nursery.

But a local CM might be able to pick up your DC from primary school when they start, so wrap around care would be easier.

why would you trust random nursery staff more?

Because the nursery staff would never be alone with my baby and a childminder would.

Because the nursery staff would never be alone with my baby and a childminder would.

Because no ones ever managed to abuse kids in a nursery (assuming that’s your concern) :(

(I’ve spent many many years advising nurseries on problem employees so accept I’m maybe not the most balanced either!)

A nursery worker is alone with your baby at every nappy change....

These replies are really helpful! Thank you.

I worry about my DS being with a lot of different staff as he's been with me for nearly a year and only occasionally with my family and a little bit with a childminder for "babysitting" for a few hours a week. He seemed to really like her which made me think the bond with a CM and getting out and about in the day/being in a home environment would be nice.

I went back to work when they were 6 months for DS and 9 for DD and used a Childminder. Personally I felt more comfortable with Childminders for babies. However both childminders decided to stop childminding when my child was about 2 (coincidence I hope!) so they went to nursery after that which seemed to suit them

Wow some people are very defensive. No it’s not really about abuse. There’s a group of 3 childminders that I always see in soft play. I doubt when the parents pick up their kids they tell them “this morning I chatted to my friends and ignored your toddler for 3 hours”
If you have an amazing childminder (and I’m sure that there are amazing ones) that you trust completely to always tell you the truth, good for you. Not sure why you need to challenge people for feeling different to you.

Some nurseries aren’t great either. I’ve been to a lot with work too and there are some rubbish ones. When I was looking for a nursery I was looking for a mix of age ranges, well qualified staff, low staff turnover, openness and for kids that looked happy and engaged with staff.

And nursery workers aren’t alone at nappy changes, since an abuse case a few years ago, they have to be visible to other staff. This is true at my nursery but I would think everywhere has to have that in place to meet safeguarding requirements.

I used a childminder. I looked at nurseries but didn't like that there were loads of staff and they were stuck in one place all day. My childminder took them places every day, knew each child so so well (as there were less children than at nursery). She is an amazing lady and worth her weight in gold. My ds loves her and talks about her now years later. She taught him loads and not just academically but with regards to manners, interacting with other children etc.
I have friends that work in nurseries and I wouldn't send a child to a nursery even if it was free.
People have different opinions though.

IMO there are pro’s and cons to both but from the outset it’s worth bearing in mind that childcare is a business, so whichever you choose you need to go into it by thinking that whoever you employ to look after your child is doing it to earn a living for themselves and not for the benefit of your child.

In terms of nurseries, there is a variety of staff, so even if there is one who is difficult/unlikeable/temperamental/whose personality just doesn’t jell with your child’s there will likely be others who will get on fine with him/her. On the downside however if you have a quiet child who struggles in large groups they might find a nursery environment too overwhelming.

Childminders on the other hand create a home from home environment which may suit a quieter child better, however on the downside a childminder is just one person, and if they are not looking after the child in a manner which you would approve of there is no way of you knowing that, especially if the child is not yet verbal. And I’m not talking about abuse here or even behaviour which is seriously neglectful, but small things which shouldn’t happen in an environment where you are paying for someone to look after your child.

Personally I’ve seen too many childminders to ever consider employing one should the need have arisen. Childminders who sit at softplay and essentially leave the kids to their own devices. Who arrange for other parents to collect their charges from preschool, who left babies in the car out of sight while they dropped off older kids. Who sat around waiting for older kids to play sport (fair enough) but left babies to cry and then rang the parent to collect when the baby was sick through crying because the cm had had enough that day, and the list goes on.

All small-ish things in the life of a parent, but significant when you’re paying for it iyswim.

And you only have to look at the back to work threads to see how often childminder is recommended as a way to earn a living, so they’re not in it for the love of children as a rule, although that helps obviously, and around here they charge upwards of £50 a day .

Sadly childcare (of any kind) has become a business now and the actual object of that business e.g. the children, seems to have fallen through the cracks somewhat.

We used a nursery, partly because we had friends whose child had been over 2 years and who recommended it - and no personal recommendations for a childminder.

Friends experience with childminders has been more hit and miss than ours - either great, or quite a lot of problems. 2 friends have had significant childcare issues due to either the childminder being sick, or someone in the childminder's family. Our nursery is very pragmatic about illness so we've only had days off for sickness bugs (they'll give prescribed medication like antibiotics and will give calpol for a temperature, you only have to collect of it doesn't bring it back under 38).

Like your DC, mine have gone at most for 2 days a week. I think that does change what you want from childcare - it feeling like home is less of a priority, as is them going out and about and doing normal activities. One of the things I like about our nursery is they are very good at doing the kind of messy activities you just can't do without a 2nd adult to help with set up / clean up.

I wanted my son to be in an environment as close to home as possible so for me a CM was perfect. He was just a part of her family...they played, ran errands, did the school run, napped...all the things he would do with me. He was with his childminder for 3 1/2 years and they were so so close. I also like the age ranges to socialise with at a CM, rather than a group all the same age..much more like a family setting. Also he had the same CM throughout, rather than moving rooms every year as many nurseries do.

When he was older he did some hours at pre-school as well as the CM to prepare for school. It all worked brilliantly and we/he still talks with such affection for his CM and her family.

You need to go and visit both childminder and any nurseries that you are interested in.

Remember though it is not 1.1 childcare. If you want 1:1 then you need a Nanny. A nursery will have a ratio of 1:3 for under twos.

You need to try and visit the nursery over mid morning, lunch time and nap time. This will give you a real feel for the place and the bigger picture of what is going on, rather than the usual 'show round' where you only see the positives.

Look for staff interaction with children, ask about qualifications, age range of staff teams and staff turnover, again this will give a true picture.

View toddler and pre _school area/ rooms too because in a couple of years your little one will be transferring into these rooms.

Personally I would not want my child in the pre _school section unless the planning was led by a qualified early years teacher.