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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Childminder breaking rules?

58 replies

Weareboatsremember · 28/06/2017 18:49

This isn't the first time my childminder has done similar, so I'm looking for either confirmation that she shouldn't have done it, or to be told that I shouldn't be bothered by it!
Yesterday the childminder had to pick her own child up from school at 10am as they'd had an accident and needed to be taken to hospital. My child is in preschool, and needed to be picked up at 11.45am. Cm made no attempt to contact me, and instead arranged for her mother to pick up my child and one other mindee. (The fact that the mother is not on the school's permitted pick up list is a different complaint!)!The cm's mother took my child back to the cm house and took care of her until 2.45 when the cm returned from the hospital with her own child.
First I heard of this was at pickup at 5.30pm.
Cm and her mom used to be co-minders, but haven't been for over a year and a half. My dc is 3. I've never signed to say that the cm can leave my child with her mom, nor that my child can be driven around in the Mom's car, which is what happened yesterday.
While I appreciate that the cm priority was her own child and taking them to hospital (not life threatening, I'm not heartless!), am I unreasonable to think she should have at least sent me a text to say what was happening and give us the option to collect my dc from nursery ourselves? Has she broken regulations?

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StealthPolarBear · 28/06/2017 18:51

Yes she should have texted and offered you the alternative

familyiswhatmatters · 28/06/2017 18:52

Yabu in my opinion

2014newme · 28/06/2017 18:54

My cm had an emergency clause that covered this. However she should have called and asked you if you would prefer to pick up your own child. Just ask her to do that in future. No dramas.

Chchchchangeabout · 28/06/2017 18:54

YANBU but no idea about the rules

sexcauldron · 28/06/2017 18:55

Why didn't she ask her mother to sort out her kid and she could still be cm for yours??

MeanAger · 28/06/2017 18:55

Most childminders have someone they use as a back up for emergency situations, often it is another childminder but sometimes it is their partner or a family member. It's very possible her mum is named as her back up person as she used to work with her. However this has to be told to all parents and they have to sign to agree to it. Personally I would have no problem with this situation but I would want to know about it upfront.

user1466690252 · 28/06/2017 18:56

I think she should of text. She should of given you the option to agree or make alternative arrangments. i wouldn't be happy

Sleephead1 · 28/06/2017 18:57

Yes i would be annoyed with school and childminder. They should have contacted you. My childminder had a form about in emergency leaving children with another childminder i didnt sign as work 5 mins away and dont want my son to have to be dropped off with a stranger as weve never met her.

BackforGood · 28/06/2017 18:58

I would be delighted that she had a back up plan in place and that I wasn't been called out of work, when it wasn't even my dc who needed me.

However she should have asked / told you about this back up plan in advance, you are right in that aspect.

Whathaveilost · 28/06/2017 19:00

Maybe she should have sent a message but i honestly wouldnt have a problem with this especially as the mum has been a co minder. I would be grateful that the mum helped out rather than passing a problem to me in the middle of the working day.
I may feel different if she dudnt have any child minding expierence though.

Diamondlife · 28/06/2017 19:01

It was an emergency & she had a back up helper, but you should be made aware of what happens in a emergency & she should have let you know.

Groovee · 28/06/2017 19:03

My old childminder had 3 people as back up but if one of them had to step in, she would text. I had met them all so was happy with the situation x

RodeoDriveBaby · 28/06/2017 19:05

Why didn't she ask her mother to sort out her kid and she could still be cm for yours??

Presumably because she wanted to take her own child to hospital?

gamerwidow · 28/06/2017 19:05

She should have text you to give you the option to pick up Dd if you chose to. I wouldn't have a problem with this though, far better for the CM to put emergency measures in place rather than drag me out of work.

Doglikeafox · 28/06/2017 20:25

I personally would have text you and let you know. Also, I myself have a policy to say that in emergency situations my mum will step in (retired childminder).
I think you just need to mention to her that in future you would prefer to have the option of picking up, and at the very least been informed.
I think the CM was trying to spare you worry/stress.
Also, it doesn't really sound like she broke 'rules' per se, maybe just etiquette. It was an emergency.

audweb · 28/06/2017 20:29

Wouldn't worry me. My childminder has at least a couple of back ups and she tries to let me know in an emergency but otherwise it's not an issue as she tells me after. I'd rather that than get pulled out of work. Also quite often the childminders would do pick up from the nursery for each other's kids to save three of them all going to the same place and back. If you're that uncomfortable tell her that, but I wouldn't have gotten worked up about it.

InDubiousBattle · 28/06/2017 20:32

YANBU. I wouldn't be happy about not receiving at least a text from the cm. I would be fuming with pre school though. I have just filled in forms to register dd at pre school and there is a section where I give details of people permitted to pick her up. There is then a password that anyone except me and dp would have to use. There is no way they would let ds (he's already at the pre school)leave with anyone not on that list without speaking to me. They would expect to be told by me or do of any change of plan. Even if I called and said someone other than those on the list were picking up they would school till require the password from them.

gallicgirl · 28/06/2017 20:37

My childminders have always had named back up carers in their policy packs and I think also a procedure for what would happen in an emergency. Assuming that the mother is the named back up she's not put your child at risk. However I would expect to be notified of what is happening at the time, particularly as the back up had to do the school pick up.
I think I'd be having a chat with school about their procedures.

heebiejeebie · 28/06/2017 21:39

In your situation I would be pleased that she had sorted out a perfectly sensible plan.

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/06/2017 22:56

I think she meant well

She had an emergency. She sorted out childcare with someone she trusts / possibly on her back up list - rather then Inconvienve you

Yes maybe she should have texted you but guess her mind was elsewhere

Doesn't make her a bad cm. just a worried parent

If she had texted you saying her mum was picking up would you have said no, I will leave work and collect my own child ?

Maybe check who she leaves mindees with in contract

Original poster

Weareboatsremember · 29/06/2017 00:00

A mixed bag of responses then!
I feel annoyed that I pay for my child to be with someone and I had no idea that they were with someone else until 5.30pm, and this had happened at 10am, so plenty of time to be notified by the cm by text. Her own dc wasn't in mortal danger, they had shut their finger in a door at school, so just needed to have it looked at up at the hospital.
A couple of people have asked if I'd have come out of work to get dd myself if I'd known and I think I would have done. Or I have emergency childcare that I can call on at short notice if the cm is unavailable. There is no back up person listed in the contract, and I don't know about insurance and car seats etc with the cm mom, hence my worry about her breaking ofsted regulations in leaving my child with someone without telling me. a text would have taken seconds to send, but now I'll look like a bit of a cow raising the issue with her!

OP posts:

Ginormoustrawberry · 29/06/2017 00:12

Yes, she has broken regulations.

Even if her mother is her assistant she cannot look after the children alone for more than two hours a day. Her mum is unlikely to have a current first aid certificate and certainly no insurance.

That said I agree with posters who wouldn't have an issue with this. Unfortunately that opinion is moot in the eyes of OFSTED.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 29/06/2017 00:13

I wouldn't be at all bothered by this. She arranged for her Mum to do it, a recent CM also, not the man from the end of the street who happened to be passing by...

If you trust her to look after your child you should trust her judgement in these matters imo. If you don't trust that she will make sure there are appropriate car sears etc, then you shouldn't leave your DC with her at all.

Lindy2 · 29/06/2017 00:24

She should have an emergency policy and her mum is probably the named emergency cover. She should have called or texted you though so YANU to be a little annoyed you weren't informed.
YABU to think she should have waited to get her daughter seen. That was an emergency in my opinion and it was perfectly reasonable for her to take her daughter to be checked. She is a mum too.
Do you have other issues with your childminder? You don't sound particularly trusting of her choices and emergency cover. To me though it sounds like everything was handled well by her apart from the lack of text to you. Perhaps she was worried about her daughter and forgot.

Lindy2 · 29/06/2017 00:27

Ginormous - assistant rules are different if it is an emergency situation. A trip to A&E for a child would allow emergency procedures to kick in.

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