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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

what have i done???????????

42 replies

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:24

i had a thread last week about a single dad with 2 girls aged 5 mths and nearly 3
i had concerns but not about negelt but about how he was coping
anyway i finally phoned the health visitor
anyway on friday he tell me they are on the social sevices at risk reg
i've not seen him since no phone call etc

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StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:26

oh no
ive just added to your thread on that to see how things were going!
amd totally ..how terrible for you and him.
have the children not been back?, did they give you any info on what action was to be taken?

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:27

were the children meant to be with you today?
did you say you had rang h.v?

Katymac · 19/09/2006 10:28

I am sorry to add to your problems but you need to ring the HV or SS to say you haven't seen them

It is important - really it is

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:29

btw, its not you thats escalated the prob, you thought you were doing it in best interest cos you could see he needed a bit of help. its ss that have gone in heavy handed

Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:31

not seen the children
i phoned hv on tuesday but didnt tell the dad he didnt mention the hv on friday he was just chatting to me and said they were on the at risk reg because of their mum as at first she kept coming and going and her boyfriend was hitting her so social services deided to take over

no idea what happened a weekend nobody has phoned hope everything is ok i feel so bad now would not have phone hv if i had known

in my contracts from now on might add another queistion about social sevices and the at risk reg would you

OP posts:

MaryP0p1 · 19/09/2006 10:32

They won't take the children unless there is a real problem. Social services always try to keep the family together as much as possible.

Have you rang him? I agree with Katymac first try him and then no joy try the HV.

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:33

so he didnt say hed had an unexpected phone call puting them on reg?, just that they were on it cos of his ex???
and should they be with you today?
if so why not give dad a call?

Uwila · 19/09/2006 10:33

Oh no. I feel a big bad social services story coming on.

Poor man needs help, not to be on a list of condemnation. I think very few nice things about SS, and stories like I expect this thread will evolve into are the very reason why.

Poor man... point him to mumsnet. We'll help him!

MaryP0p1 · 19/09/2006 10:33

Good idea about the question.

Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:35

will do
i've phoned his home and his mobile
i've phoned his mum and his grandmw
no answer
phoned work but they would only pass a message and couldnt yell me if he was in work or not

i will phone hv good idea didnt think of that

OP posts:

Katymac · 19/09/2006 10:35

I'm not sure as childminders whether we can ask that question - I think it is a bit intrusive

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:36

so was he already on reg or been put on again cos of hv?

alexsmum · 19/09/2006 10:36

doesn't sound like they are on at risk reg because of your phone call. stop feeling guilty. you did exactly the right thing.
you have to act as if this is any other child you look after.phone and say " just checking everything is ok as you haven't turned up ".
this is NOT down to you!

MaryP0p1 · 19/09/2006 10:37

Why not. I agree intrustive but relevant no?

Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:37

they were already on reg dont even know if hv had made contact

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StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:37

thats what im thinkins alexmum..
and today could be totally innocent like he/one of children is poorly and not thought to ring..hope so .

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:38

so prob is that theyve not turned up?
do they live close? could you pop over?
could you ask his work for him to call you immediatly??..surely they would then say if he was there or not?

MaryP0p1 · 19/09/2006 10:39

I agree intrusive but relevant though no?

alexsmum · 19/09/2006 10:39

are they meant to be with you tomorrow?

Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:41

just phoned dad
everything ok (thank god)
i really paniced
5mth old been up all night so dad slept in he didnt hear the phone and his mobile was downstairs
says he is sorry for not phoning sooner (should have arrived at 7.30am)
i dont care as long as they are ok
thanks all for your concern hopefully they will be with me tomorrow

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Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:42

going to phone ofsted to ask if you can ask parents bout social services etc
will keep you posted

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alexsmum · 19/09/2006 10:44

good news. i didn't think it was because of your call.
sounds like you are an incredibly caring loving childminder btw.

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:44

pheeeeeewww..was glued here!, really felt for you (and the dad/children)
so glad it ok.
do not blame yourself, he is the one using appropriate childcare ie you and doing his best for children, id prob ring HV and ask what will be done but from what i remember she just said she would have a word on her 6 month check on baby didnt she?
maybe you could ask about the mopther and if theres anything you need to know(ask the dad that too).
sooo glad all is well...can race round for dd finishing nursery now!

StrawberryMoon · 19/09/2006 10:45

could he drop them round this afty to you so he could get himself together/have a few hours on own with him obv not being at work???hed prob appreciate it.

Original poster

dmo · 19/09/2006 10:46

thanks strawberry your so sweet
and thanks eveybody

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