The Hair that Broke the Camels Back... nanny off sick AGAIN...

[incognitotoday]

I approved a weeks holiday for her short notice and she was due back today. Have to say I was not surprised when I received a text this morning saying she is ill and is going to see the doc.

This has been on-going with at least 1-3 days a month off sick. Had a real bad bout Christmas, January and March/April. So far I've been very understanding and leniant as I'm 99.9% certain she wasn't pulling a fast one but I've about had enough.

Was also supposed to go for an interview this afternoon as I was looking and changing jobs due to lack of work where I am, but with nanny being less than reliable how can I possibly start a new job???

Thankfully I have a great boss who is very flexible, probably also because he doesn't pay me if I don't work, but even he's starting to frown at my frequent absences...

I'm in such a mood today I'm 'that' close to just texting here 'don't bother coming back, I'll pay the 4 weeks notice pay into your account'. Won't do it of course because I know I'm wound up and impulsive...

Not sure what I want from this post, but had to vent Thanks or reading.

well good luck & tell us how it goes

you definitely deserve better than this!!

You know what I'm going to say. You need to say "goodbye". Of course, you want to be as polite and compassionate as you can. But, your nanny is simply not able to do the job. I'd be a basket case if my nanny did what yours does. Actually, I wouldn't be where you are because I would have had to end it long ago. You are far more patient than I am.

Also, as I happen to know you have had several informal chats with her on the issue, I do think it is time to sit down with a formal communication setting. I would probably have a serious talk and at the same time hand it to her in writing. I also wouldn't pay a penny for her sick days. No way I could afford it.

Reasonable sick time is up to say 3 or 4 days per year. A few days a month is more than most working parents could tolerate.

Could you keep her part time? Say 2 days a week and the kid(s) to go to nursery the other days? Maybe reducing her work load would help her health. Although, as I recall, she doesn't work terribly long hours as it is.

Uwila, you are far too scary to ever be a basket case!

Don't mess with me MrsS.

Hey, are you back in the UK yet?

I knew you would say that Uwila .

MrsS Uwila is really a pussy cat ... well one with attitude but still very nice.

Getting dh to have a chat with nanny this arvo when he gets back from work because I'm about to loose it...

... just before I left for work I said, we'll have our chat later she said she'll listen but she won't talk much because she's in pain (bad tooth, hence off yesterday for first dentist appointment and leaving early tomorrow for root canal treatment). Fair enough I thought, so said, basically it's what I've said in my email. to which she would be better tomorrow because she only briefly looked at it because the pc is too noisy and she was in pain and had a headache.

. argh! Is it only me or what? if I were the employee who got a text telling me there's an email in prep for a talk that needs to be had I'd be going straight to the PC and read the bloody thing properly. Naturally one wouldn't WANT to do it but would? even with a headache? Also shouldn't I be the one dictating the how's and when's of the discussion? [can ya tell I'm a bit wound up?]

I sympathise that she's in pain, I've had abcesses (sp?) in the past and they are awful, but she just seemed so dismissive of the situation. May it be that she's playing 'ostrich'?

My tether defo nearing it's end...

venting session over

oh and yes... I took the chicken way out and sent the email

uh oh...

"Getting dh to have a chat with nanny this arvo when he gets back from work because I'm about to loose it... "

Every time I chicken out and get DH to talk to them it results in the nanny/chilminder crying.

So, are you at home again today?

working today as nanny showed, but I'm going for an interview this arvo so probably not back before she goes home.

Hey and the mood I'm in I don't really care whether he'll have her in tears .

But dh can actually be quite professional, firm but fair type thing, so hoping it won't come to that. Also wrote a long note for nanny/him to read and talk about, also mentioning that we like the way she does her duties, when she's there... so not all negative

oh and totted up the sick days she's had, at least those I made a note off, because a couple she substituted for annual leave... Since December 2005 a grand total of ... wait for it... 16 days

The really sad thing is that I half expected nanny not to show yesterday after her week annual leave... trust issues on my side?

er, you might want to point out that if she is in too much pain to talk to you how effective is she being with the children?? that would definitely be my main issue over this whole thing .... altho I know that you have said she is brill, but, she is sounding less and less brill with each post .......

muminaquandry, good point there!

I've gone to work with all sorts of ailements but then again I don't look after somebody elses's kids... and can just hide behind my keyboard

Do you think she suffers from hypochondria? I'm not being funny. It seems her ailments are all very unrelated, and very real to her. But, somehow, unbelievable to me.

Texting is so she dosen't have to answer any awkward questionsCan you find someone else?
1-3 days amonth is too much and affecting your earnings.There are people out there who won't take the mickey.
Good luck.