According to my DD, she spends the whold day watching TV at her childminders!

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, my 6 year old daughter is home educated and has recently started going to a child minder one day a week. I asked on facebook if anyone knew any good CM's and a friend of my husbands family mentioned her daughter, who used to be a nursery nurse. She's only in her early 20's but I didn't feel we could really say no, so we though we'd give her a try. I sent my DD with a big bag of things to entertain herself, eg pens, paper, puzzles, books etc. When I picked her up she was asleep on the sofa. The CM said she'd been good etc. When I asked her what she'd done, she said watched cbeebies and a DVD. She didn't do any drawings or play with any of her things either. I noticed that the TV has been on every time we've visited, and if it's on, DD will watch it. She has an 18 month old daughter who DD has become very fond of, but no other CM children.
I'm not sure wether to say something very tactful to enquire about what she's been doing there, just carry on taking her, or what? I find these things really awkward! I don't mind her watching a DVD or some TV, but 6 hours worth is just too much. She goes on a day that's usually a chill out day, but even so, I usually encourage her to play games, read to her and involve her in what I'm doing.
Am I asking too much though?

why were you desperate? surely if you home eductae that means you dont work out of teh home. why were you so pressed that you didn't have time to aske if she was registered?

all you have to do is say, it isn't working out. if she is anyway in it for teh chidlren she will understand taht not all CMers are suitable for all children.

If you phone up your local surestart they will send or email you a list of reputable local childminders

Why don't you just send her to school for one day a week? At least you know then it'll registered/inspected/stimulating/age-appropriate/educational/value for money/sociable...shall I go on?

Say you need her reg number for tax credits.

When she can't give you one then just say, 'Oh mistake on my part but i really can't afford this without help from tax credits so i'll have to look for someone registered'

OR

'Look you're shit. And frankly for £25 I expected a lot more than to have to provide my own activities (which you haven't bothered with) and the TV shoved on'.

Either of those work?

Thanks cat. BooHoo- I do work nights, my daughter also has special needs which can be quite demanding. She isn't naughty, but it can be very draining.

When she was at school, she was a nightmare! She came out of school ready to explode! Since she's been at home she's like a different child. She's happy, calmer and far more relaxed. She's also comming along very well accademicaly and socially.

Thanks Nick-Nacks! I think I'll use your first suggestion.

"When she was at school, she was a nightmare! She came out of school ready to explode! Since she's been at home she's like a different child. She's happy, calmer and far more relaxed. She's also comming along very well accademicaly and socially."

well in that case i actually cant believe you put so little effort into finding the right care for her!! i am actually shocked that knowing how school affected her you simply handed her over to the first person that was suggested to you, without checking her qualifications, her references, how she was with your DD, asking what she would be doing during the time she was there. i am totally stumped by this one.

you're welcome!

It is unlawful to use unregistered care.
If she wants to babysit free of charge and sit her in front of tv all day that's fine, but if she receives any sort of reward - even a bunch of flowers, she MUST be registered.

I just felt very on the stot! I didn't know what to say or ask. I felt comfortable that we know her and we went to see her with our DD in her house and our DD loved her baby, and was looking forward to going there. We told her all the relavent info and what she likes to do etc. I felt happy that my DD was so relaxed there and seemed very keen to come again.

Do you meed registered as a CM or with ofsted, or both? She is a registered nursary nurse. She has all her child care quallifications and is CRB checked.

her home must be registered for her to use it to CM in. her qualifications are fine but if her home isn't registered she cant use it. it is a safety issue.

Well, we'd all be a lot calmer if we sat in front of the TV all day.

But - the stimulation of school is too much? I don't get it. I'm off. Ignore me.

That is all fine to work in a nursery but a CM is a different 'job' if you will.

OFSTED reg CM's and they do reference checks, medicas, CRB on CM and all adults in the house, safety of the house, ensure paediatric first aid, child protection are all up to date, check CM is providing varied and stimulations activities,,,,,i could go on! Also it is a requirement that to hold PLI!

I see. I'd better let her know. I'll be far more careful next time.

also, if she is unregistered, she wont be paying tax on what she earns. ok i know she wouldn't anyway on what you are paying her but if she takes on more chidlren she may meet the tax threshold but not be declaring it.

She's not sat in front of the TV all day at home!!! She gets far more one to one time than she would at school. It seems obvious you don't have any idea about how some SEN's can effect some children, she is a very complex charactor.

she would need to be ofstead and CM registered. Yes she may have been a nursery nurse and CRB checked but she'll need a new CRB to be registered.

Go and meet some child minders, ask what they do all day. You may be hard pressed to find one willing to take a 6 year old all day as most of them would have babies in the day, and 5+ afterschool, so maybe think about 2 afternoons rather than 6 solid hours if you can.

to those other posters, 1 hours of 1-1 home ed is proven to be as good as 6 hours of school in a class of 30.
My girls who both have autism will be home schooled after year 6, they wont manage senior schools at all, especially the eldest

" It seems obvious you don't have any idea about how some SEN's can effect some children,"

well why would she have any idea how some SENs can affect some children? we dont get a handout in the maternity ward of how every type of SEN affects every type of child you know!! what a silly thing to say.

NonnoMum, its not about being calm sat infront of tv.
School is aalot of noise, a lot of personalility, social understanding, my girls certainly struggle alot and require alot of imput to manage a standard day at school.

Thank you lisad123- My dd is being assessed for ASD too. She is actually willing to socialise with her HE friends at the groups far more than she did in school! I think she feels more secure knowing we're there if she needs us, she's vernturing out of herself much more.
I hope HE goes well for you too.

BooyHoo- are you a child minder?? If so, I'm sorry to say, I wouldn't want to looking after my dog, let alone my child! You seem like an angry nasty piece of work to me. I've been very open and honest and have admitted I made a mistake, yet you're still being a bitch!
Boy, I really will have to be careful who I chose!

girls with ASD are hughly effected by anxiousness, and it takes over in a way that is just too much to cope with. :(