Worried that if I have a CS then I won't be experiencing childbirth....

[Chelle1986]

Now don't get me wrong - giving birth petrifies me!! But that doesn't mean I don't wnat to do it!

I am 28+2 and baby is breech (plenty of time to turn yet I know, but still am a pregnant panicker!!) and not really in to the thought of having a natural breech birth....

If I had to have a CS am I really experiencing ''childbirth'' - I mean, do you have contractions or anything...not really sure how it works....is my first DS....

Feel like a proper thicko now.....

Hi Chelle,

No answers for you but I'm pregnant with identical twins and have been told I'll be having a C section. I think I'd be scared either way but think the most important thing is having a healthy baby, however it comes out!

A planned c section would happen before you went into labour, or if you go into labour early they would do it then. And although it's a different experience you still have a baby at the end which is the most important thing. And you will have given birth and don't let anyone tell you any differently.

Still plenty of time for that baby to turn several times though!!

Ive had 3 c sections,under 3 different sets of circumstances.

In a planned c section they give you an epidural type needle which numbs your stomach and legs and chest - you are fully awake and dont feel any pain -the op is done and you see your baby 'fresh from the oven' then you are stitched up and encouraged to take an active part of your babies care whilst also needing care yourself cos its a major op.

Under most circumstances this is a a relatively safe birth,theres none of the pushing and shoving and contractions etc everything is 'managed'.

With the best will in the world if your baby needs to be delivered by c sect all the rasperry leaf and birthing ball practice wont do anything - I had 17 hours of strong labour with my first and then a c section.

A c section is easier or any less of a birth,its just a different way to get the same outcome - a beautiful baby.

It would have been nice for me personally to have given birth naturally with no pain relief and have been the 'earth mother' everyone expected me to be.....but sometimes things dont work out that way.

I still have 3 most gorgeous fantastic dc though- even if they were delivered through the sunroof [wink.

a c section isnt easier

Chelle1986, all I can offer to comfort you is that - having given birth myself and facing it again in November - the idea of a planned section is very appealing.

I sympathise with your feelings, but (a) you've got plenty of time for the baby to turn (get on those hands and knees), and (b) once you've got your baby in your arms you may find it ceases to be significant.

Hi Chelle1986, firstly there is still plenty of time for the baby to turn. My DD was still breech at 35 weeks but I followed all the tips for turning a baby (lots of sitting forwards or on hands and knees with my bum in the air) and she went head down at 37 weeks so don't panic.

However I did still finish up having a c-section - I went 17 days overdue without any signs of labour starting then had an induction which also failed and in the end a c-section was the only way my stubborn DD was coming out. Like you I had wanted to experience childbirth and I had been planning a home water birth so this was about as far from what I wanted as you can get. However I had fantastic midwives who made me feel very in control of all the decisions (even though I didn't really have a choice) and kept reminding me that the most important thing was to get my baby here safely. In the end I can honestly say that as soon as I held my beautiful DD all those 9 months of planning and obsessing over the 'perfect birth' went straight out of my head and I didn't care how she had arrived I was just so excited to be holding her. I've never felt as though I've missed out on anything, as far as I'm concerned my job was to get her here safely and I did that and the birth is such a small part of being a mother I really never think about it. As I had the failed induction I did have contractions but another girl in our NCT group had a planned c-section as the baby was breech so no contractions and she also has no problems with the birth and doesn't feel she missed anything. I do think it helps if you think about the possibility of a c-section in advance and know what you want in case it happens - e.g. I wanted DH to have skin to skin with DD while I was stitched and my friends DH was able to take pics of the weighing etc so she feels she didn't miss anything. If you consider those options and let the hospital know what you want it makes you feel more in control and an active part of the birth rather than it being something that just happens to you.

HTH and sorry if it's a bit waffly! Good luck and I hope everything goes smoothly for you.

HI Chelle

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I would just like to second Riven's point that there are lots of people who will tell you what an "ideal / perfect" birth is - well in my opinion no such thing exists really, the only perfect birth is one that gets your baby delivered as safely and happily as possible!

I've had one of each and to me, it really didn't make much difference. Didn't feel there was anything particularly amazing about the first, natural birth that made me feel I was missing out when the second one turned into an emergency caesarian (which I had fully conscious with an epidural). Neither birth was traumatic, but both times I found the actual baby was more exciting than the process.

Anyway, as has already been said, 28 weeks seems early to be sure about what is going to happen: plenty of time for a breech baby to turn.

after reading about natural births i was convinced that i would be one of those earth mothers,my baby had other plans,she was over two weeks overdue,was not even engaged and my cervix was totally closed,had to be induced,,terrible and nothing happened,,anyway got the c section,,i was up the same day,not working but just moving a little,everything went well and i can say i gave birth to a wonderful happy and healthy DD,whats important is the baby and their well being,,im not saying a c section is the best,,no,,what im saying is when its time for the baby to be born,,all your written orders and notes go with the wind,,and many times you end up doing it the other way than u would have planned,,just go with an open mind,,,anyway when u see your DC,,all the thoughts go away,,

oh,,AND OF COURSE THE WELL BEING OF THE MOTHER,,

I did it all - transverse baby = planned, cs. Oh shit, baby turned head down = go home. Oh shit, baby still in there at 41 weeks = induction. Oh shit, baby in distress =EMCS.

Tell you what, a few years on I couldn't give a stuff how she came out. My dd is ALIVE. I am ALIVE. We can argue over her manners and food choices all we want. And I love it!!!!!

And that is all that matters at the end of the day.

I always wanted to give birth...then I did.

I would rather have had a C-section.(I think!)

I had an ELCS. I was in so much pain, not numbed properly, feeling my organs moved around, they gave me extra gas and air.

There's no easy way to have a baby and your and its safety is the most important thing. All else is just cosmetic IYSWIM.

You will be given a date, most likely a week before your DD and then put on the operating table. I brought a CD with my own music, my DH held my hand, etc. The doc took great pictures straight after, it was very emotional. I didn't feel cheated at all. I was just anxious to have her out healthy and safe. The pain was intensified because I was nervous and tense before I met my little daughter. It all faded away when I held her. Recovery was v slow that's why I'd like to try a VBAC this time around. Fingers crossed it will all go well.

Do not worry too much. Good luck to you and your baby!

I agree, safety is the main thing.
If a CS is the safest way for you then thats the priority.
Having had 2 CS myself, I would say, no it isnt 'childbirth' and I would have much rather been able to do it 'normally', but this way I got to be alive afterwards, with live babies.

It's just too early though for you to worry about a c section, it's not worth the stress,your baby will all over the place yet, hang in there and wait and see

I have never had a c section, was at risk for one with my 1st and recommended for an elective on second (which I was so glad I refused) from what I found from talking to those who had had one - the main thing is recovery is much longer, and there are as with any surgery other risks.

Get yourself a birth ball, hang over it so that you are sort of resting on all fours for half an hr each day and most likely your baby will get into a great position, my mw told me to do that and it certainly worked for me, had such a different experience on the second birth.

I can't add anything about the natural .v. c section element as haven't given birth myself yet.

But in terms of baby turning, mine was transverse at every appointment from 26 - 34 weeks then turned but went back to back until last week when she turned the right way at 39 weeks so they can change position a lot in the last trimester.

Have had a fourteen hour labour with contractions every minute and two caesarians. The caesarians are neither easier nor less painful (in terms of pain after anyway). Neither of mine made it out the regular route in the end.

But they are both fit and well and so am I - caesarians aren't that bad.

I do sometimes wonder if I missed something but then I remember those hours and hours of contractions and begging for drugs because I was in a lot of pain (inducted labour) and being offered two paracetamols frankly was not cutting the mustard and I think nahhhh I didn't miss much!

I feel just as much achievement at growing a baby inside me and taking that baby home healthy and well as a woman who has pushed the baby out themselves (and I don't walk like John Wayne for two days afterward )

I've had 2 emergency sections, both in the second stage so a total of 60 hours of labour as well.
I don't consider that I have "birthed" a baby really, in that neither of mine came out of my vagina, but I couldn't care less. There are pros and cons of both modes of birth and at the end of the day it quite simply does not matter. A cs is an experience in and of itself and afterwards you still get the whole "overwhelmed new parent" thing. I figure I made my children, grew them, fed them after they came out and look after them every day. It's the next 50 years + that matter.

Focusing on the birth when you have grown a child and are going to spend the rest of your life nurturing him or her is a bit shortsighted. It's like people who obsess about their wedding, but forget they have to live with the bugger afterwards!

My planned C-section was my perfect birth.

My vile natural delivery involved all kinds of cutting, pulling, excruciating and damage and if I would never go near one again.

I had a 'normal' birth and due to the baby being a little 'awkward' I decided never to have any more kids.

No.2 - was promised a ECS and again the baby decided to come early so the lovely calm delivery turned into a EmCS.

No.3 - Totally not planned pregnancy turned into a lovely calm ECS, I spent time discussing the cricket with the anethetist who turned out to live at the top of the hill that we live at the bottom of.We also discussed rugby and the state of the local fire station they are trying to close down.

Apparently on the G&A they gave you for birth 1 I sang various show tunes and finished with a LOUD rendition of master of the house from Les Misrables, I put a LOT of emphasis on the rude words

Oooh, I LOVED my elective c-section. It is right up there as one of the best experiences of my life.

My VB was most definitely the worst experience of my life.

I had an emcs last time and definitely felt that I hadn't experienced childbirth. In fact I was upset when people referred to my DC being 'born' - in my mind, DC had been 'delivered' which was different. To this day (4 years later) I've never said 'I gave birth' to DC because I didn't. It upset me for a long time, not helped by people who heard I'd had a section (without knowing the full story) making flippant comments like I was too posh to push - can I just stress that whatever the reason for a section, I don't believe it's ever down to women feeling that way

I'm sure your baby will turn before your d-day so this won't be an issue for you. For me, I just had to remember that the important thing was that DC arrived safe and well and while I am and will always be grateful for that, it didn't make me feel any less disappointed about my 'birth' experience.