Things that really, really annoyd you in labour?

[Disenchanted3]

Mine:

People talking, I was silent the whole time, at one point with my first another midwife came in and they were chatting. I wanted to shout 'Shut your your gobs!!!'

My DH (with DD), we went to sleep half way through labour, but I couldn't sleep so I got up and left him in bed (how good am I?!) I got my poor mum up ho ran a bath, but I hated being in it so went down stairs. By this time contactions were close and bad, I told my sister to get DH up and he wouldn't!! To be fair I don't think he knew what was going on. But about 5 mins later I roared 'will SOMEBODY get DH up!!'

Lastly, with DD again, before I went to bed my mum said she had not had tea, when I came down heavily in labour a few hours later, the place STUNK of kebab!!!

it knocked me sick! and threw me off my pace for a good hour because it as making me retch!

the snotty midwife

So glad that verbal abuse to NHS employees is acceptable on MN. The thought of being told to 'Shut the fuck up' by a complete stanger who will boast about it to other complete strangers really makes me want to ruxh to work tomorrow...

being left on a ward with only the curtain around the bed for privacy for my entire labour (was induced) Only being checked on 4 times in nearly 12hours, Dh being sent away because it was outside visiting hours even though I was in full blown labour. finally getting to go to the delivery suite but being made to sit in a wheelchair which I couldn't sit down in because DD was coming out - I had to elevate myself by holding on to the arm rests.
on my first night as a mother, squashed in a single room with another woman only seeing one midwife all night, who stuck her head around the door and told me to go to sleep because she didn't want me tired when the baby woke up, and then in the morning being told off for bleeding on the sheets.
DD getting jaundice and needing the phototherapy machine but none of the midwifes knowing how to work it, finally being told we could go home and not being able to leave for 8 hours because they lost some blood test results.

The MW kept calling me the wrong name "Come on (wrong name) only one more"

The MW telling me I would most likely have to go home when I arrived as I clearly was not in labour, on examining me she was "suprised I was so calm at 6cms, how have you coped on TENS and got this far"

The MW refusing to wipe my bum as "you are going to poo much more before this is over" DH stepped in at that point and got out the wet wipes.

I am 33 weeks now and nervously wondering what this labour will bring!

I was 17 and scared shitless trying to labour a 10lb 8oz back-to-back baby with no pain relief (midwife kept insisting I didn't need any at 2cms... I went from 2 to 10cms in 30 mins, so yes, some drugs might have been nice actually). Midwife told me to "shut up" when I was crying, followed by "it can't be THAT bad". I fainted with the pain - she told my mum I'd fallen asleep .
The bastard anesthetist who ripped the tape holding the epidural in off of my back and made me cry more than the contractions did!
The fact that because you're giving birth you're expected not to care about your dignity - well, I do! I don't want 20 students staring at my fandango, thanks.
In general - don't talk to me, don't touch me, no cheerleading, don't moan when I crush your hand, don't expect any sympathy for feeling "a bit faint" afterwards!

reikeizen - I'm in AWE of NHS workers, they do a fantastic job. I don't think anyone really thinks of it in that way, but I think it's just more the unfortunate 'wrong thing to say/do at the wrong time' kind of thing?
I've had 3 ELCS's and the last one, we had the staff singing and dancing in theatre to 'Green Onions' on our birthing cd that we'd made up. And the consultant surgeon who opened me up seemed a bit impressed with having Dvorak's Cello Concerto to kick off with! (What can I say? I'm a 'cellist, it calmed me down and took my mind off stuff.)
I can't really do the whole 'annoying thing in labour' but what did piss me off royally was my entire family, my parents, DH's parents and my 2 older DC's, who came rushing in the second we were out of recovery, to be loud and take lots of photo's while I was lying there with a tube up my fanjo, off my head on drugs. (And I have to admit, they were very good ones. Not that I advocate their recreational use, of course.)
The worst thing was, though, that they kept knocking into the bed as they walked around it. Perpetually. And as my drugs were wearing off at the time, it was VERY VERY annoying. So, next time, we're probably not going to ring them until we've been out of recovery for at least 2 hours and I've had a bit of a kip!

Reikeizen, I'm not knocking NHS workers at all, I am one!

[raises hand]
yes, it was me. I verbally abused my student mw. I did say I was ashamed.
I was in pain and under stress and had asked her politely to leave me in peace during contractions several times, which she did not respect.

I was an NHS worker for many years.

I apologise if I inadvertantly encouraged or condoned verbal abuse of public sector workers.

Arriving at the hospital 5cm dialated - buzzing on the door and noone letting me in.
Finally a lovely midwife walked up the coridor and buzzed us in - right inside the door three midwives sitting round a TV -obviously ingnoring the buzzer.
When the first midwife said 'Why didn't you let this woman in, she is obviously in labour?' - one of them (who to make matters worse I recognised as being in the year below me at school) answered 'Well there aren't any beds anyway' - and then turned back to the screen!!!

Midwife shouting at the locum consultant to stop what he was doing!

After a horrendous delivery, the pediatrition saying 'So you've finally stopped all that screaming.'angry

Whoops! Think I did the smiley wrong at the end - but you know what I mean!!

the fact dd arrived before the amblulance!!!

reikizen Does it help to know that on dd I had such a perfect mw that I sent her a box of chocolates and a card, She did everything she could to make things easier for me .

Other people mooing and braying. So uncouth and inconsiderate.

Me, I was silent all the way through, apart from when the consultant prepped me INSIDE for stitching. (Yes with a fucking massive piece of cotton wool dipped in alcohol. I had JUST HAD A BABY) Luckily, I couldn't kick him in the head as my feet were in stirrups. It hurt worse than delivery.

I have never been so utterly humiliated, except for when about an hour previously I shat myself whilst pushing.

Oh, the joys.

Oh yes, it was also quite humiliating afterwards whilst learning to breastfeed. The MW said, well you've got large boobs so you'll be fine. WTF??? They were never that big before, you stupid mare!

Being called the wrong name

Being told I was constipated.

Being told I was being too loud and disturbing the other women in labour.

Being told by the anaesthetist he couldn't give me an epidural as I couldn't keep still for long enough.

Being told I couldn't be on all fours on the floor because there may be glass on it.

Being told when to push by DH and midwife. Like I didn't know when to push.

Being told not to push when DS was crowning (How the hell do you not push, your body juts does it!)

Having the radio so quietly I could hardly hear it, and it was just an annoying noise.

Midwives giggling at the hypno birthing CD I wanted played.

Asking DH to open a window, and he opened two. I screamed "You're always so fucking conscientious when I'm in labour" With, hind sight I can see IWBU, but for some reason it was very annoying.

Midwife nipping out for a fag straight after DS was born, and coming back in stinking and breathing all over my baby. But that doesn't really count as I wasn't in labour any more.

To set the scene: it was just after the 2000 US presidential election. TV in delivery room. TV on. Various midwives wandered in and out looking at the TV and asking, 'so do we know who's won the election yet'. Actually, at that point in my life I wasn't really interested.

That irritated me a lot. Fortunately it's not been repeated in subsequent labours.

Red Traffic lights whilst being driven to the hospital fully dilated with DD's head about to pop out!

We seemed to hit every bloody light going!

I've thought of another one - being told by the midwife that she couldn't understand why my contractions were so painful as they didn't seem very strong (to her!) - I told her I was ready to push shortly after this but she told me I was just needing the loo and got me a bedpan. I ignored her and started pushing my DD out. Very annoying to be disbelieved - it was my 3rd baby and I knew what my body was doing!

not quite at childbirth but having just been told my baby's head was filled with fluid on his due date, the obstetrician said we could go away for a few hours while they figured out what to do but don't be late back as he had to go to the optician and obviously as a surgeon his eyesight was very important.

DH asleep on the beanbag in the delivery suite until 30 mins before DD was born.

The consultant telling me he would be back in 4 hours as I was only 7cm dilated and me telling him I would have had the baby by then as with DS I went from 7 cm to having DS in 41/2 hours and this had been a lot quicker

The ceiling between my room & the corridor fell in and flooded the room with manky water from the heating system, so they made me get up and walk under a waterfall of water to a new room. AFTER I had started pushing!!!!!!!!

Then when I got to the new room the bed wasn't made up! Annoying is not the word!

I also had a student midwife and I was the 1st labour she'd seen. She was a lovely girl and I consented to her being there as I'm a student and know how nice it is to have help from the public on placements etc. However, she was a bit clueless, kept taking my blood pressure and monitoring baby then forgetting to record it and repeating it. After a 17 hour labour I was getting mighty pee'd off with her.

When I was pushing DS out my DH was trying so hard to be helpful that he was counting down from 10-1 with each push. But he was getting overcome with emotion and was getting his numbers jumbled up very offputting!

Both times being told I wasn't in established labour. First time I was sent home and came back a few hours later in an ambulance and gave birth 4 and a half hours later. Second time I gave birth 2 hours later having barely made it to the labour ward...

Being told I wasnt in labour and not allowed to go into hospital 50 mins before ds was born! I was literally sobbing down the phone at that point ffs!