Planned homebirth, now induction and hospital birth advised, help??

[mumtotwoboys]

I'm 39+5
Have a homebirth planned.
Midwife booked me in for a scan as tummy wasn't measuring much more than 3 weeks ago.
Scan was fine and baby was all well according to sonographer, blood flowing through the cord nicely, good heartbeat, etc.. estimated current weight 8lbs.
I go through to see a replacement consultant after the scan, as mine isn't in she says 'hi, etc' open scan graphs and tells me 'baby's weight seems to be trailing off graph slightly'. His head and legs have stayed in the 90th percentile but his abdominum circumfrence has gone down to 50th percentile.
So she goes 'shall we start you off then' in a tone where she may aswell have said 'do you fancy a cup of tea'
I pause trying to work out what that means and then go '...what'? She's obviously talking about induction.
She goes 'not right now, but within the next day of two'
er um okay... why?
So she explains if his weight gain is slowing down he's probably best off coming out sooner than later.
I tell her I'm trying to avoid a hospital birth as I have a 3 year old I've never spent a night apart from, I can't sleep in hospitals which made the last time hellish..
She says she'll call my midwife to see if a home birth is still possible.
And I go back to waiting room for another 20 mins
Consultant's assistant/ or midwife comes out to speak to me and tells me midwife is saying I should give birth in hospital now.
some background; midwife has been unsuportive of homebirth all along due to her own personal veiws and was jumping at any excuse to say I should be in hospital untill I tried to change midwife and then she suddenly signed the homebirth paperwork. Now consultant is calling her and she obviously says something along the lines of; 'yes she can have a hospital birth'.
I'm suspicious that she wants less homebirths so she's called out from her warm bed less often.

So I want to know exactly what the problem is and what's changed just cause baby's waist isn't as fat as average, I explain both me and father are naturally tall and slim.
Midwife can't tell me much but she just thinks baby should be born and 'fed up' with some milk obviously.
So she says she'll leave it a bit and book me in for next thursday (when I'm 40+5) and they'll want to induce me then to be safe.
(obviously nothing urgently wrong with baby)
So I say 'I'll probably have him before then anyway, so can I just stick to as planned before' she goes 'no you'll be told to come into hospital for labour now'
I'm like 'why? is my baby okay'?
She goes 'he's okay right now and should be okay if born right now..'
so I ask why a hospital induction then?
She says she'll get consultant to speak to me again, then she realises consultant has finished for the day.
Then I basically get told clinic is over, come back next week.
I asked what if I go into labour in the meantime (which I probably will) and don't want to come to hospital, she says 'we won't leave you to do it alone we'll send midwives out even though you were advised to come in'

So I'm left bewildered, it's not clear why they don't want to do homebirth, and I don't want a big phone argument about going in when I'm in labour, and I don't want reluctant midwives who come out with the 'you're putting yourself in danger' attitude.

If I go into labour now I don't know if I should stand my ground and stay at home :-s

Sorry OP ended up with induction but I did manage to fight them to put it back a week. Probably could of done it au natural if wasn't for the pesky drugs which makes evrything more painful. Am definitely not having induction this time around

Great post, ButterflyEffect

Oh :-/

I reeeally hope midwives don't come out with a bad attitude, that's why I want to call on them late during the delivery so I'm more past caring.
My doula will be with me throughout.

I honestly feel like I could actually do it alone, I've had two babies come out perfectly well, I'm an animal like any other, baby just needs to get through vaginal entrance, I'll be more comfortable hidden away in a familiar enviroment.
They don't drag any other mammals into an alien place and expect them to give birth on a great pedistal with strangers watching, they know it causes them stress which delays things and causes complications.
My comprimise is to let midwives into my house to possibly guide head out and have some resuscitation kit if needed.

I feel like I should make it clear to them now that me letting them in during last part of labour is the one thing I'm doing for safety reasons, so PLEASE don't have a bad attitude with me.

good post the butterfly effect - well said,

there is no increased risk associated with homebirth, i dislike it when people imply that there is.

there are plenty of anecdotal horror stories out there for al kinds of birth - that you really don't need to think about now OP!

I also feel i could birth alone - the MW is just there as a safety net. they didn't touch the baby both previous times. You are not being unreasonable in any way in insisting on a homebirth when they haven't given any valid reason not to - and you have very valid reasons not to want to go to hospital.

Have you spoken to your doula this? I don't know the law but would just be a bit cautious for your doula's sake if you are considering "putting off" calling the mws - just check with the doula what her position on this would be so you don't unwittingly put her in a situation that could harm her reputation.
As others have said, I believe that you can request the mw wait in another room, so you might want to go with that option instead. And if you get a different midwife, they will probably just be excited to meet you and help you so fingers crossed you get someone different and lovely. Good luck

A doula shouldn't offer any clinical advice, speak for you or make any decisions. They are simply there for support.

So really, the doula shouldn't be in any legal trouble even if she was to freebirth (which I wouldn't recommend) as long as she doesn't catch the baby or act outside her capacity.

I know, but was thinking if anything were to go wrong god forbid, it could be very difficult for the doula and potentially harm her reputation. Just thought it would be an idea to discuss with her to see how she felt about it.
I would have thought though since OP has doula, she will be well equipped to fend off any t**tty behaviour by mw so should feel able to have mws attend on HER terms, as she has the right to do.

Thank you so much for supporting me.

I was thinking of calling midwives when I'm perhaps 5 cms dilated, I've learnt how to examine that myself (yeah I know about being extremely careful with hygene).
Last two times I turned up at hospital being only 2-3 cms dilated, would like to be at least half way through before starting some drama this time.
At 5-6 cms last times I was becoming unable to deal with pain, so that implies it's a good time to call midwives, I gueeess

I'm getting nervous about seeing my midwife on monday now and having to tell her I'm still not willing to go into hospital.
:-(
That stupid consultant wrote on my notes 'in light on scan today hospital birth now advised'
if she had put 'as there is an increased risk of;'
then I might understand it, but 3 different professionals have struggled to give me info on why there's any more risk, so wtf.

mum I had a bit of a tussle with my MW re homebirth. My iron levels dipped (v.normal for my pgs) and she seemed to translate this into 'you will have a PPH if you have the baby at home'.

I had lots of support on MNs and looked on homebirth uk and was very reassured. It was really down to mw not being that keen on HBs and not really getting why it was so important to me to stay at home.

Like you I really couldnt get to the facts of what the concerns were. Just all vague and 'you never know what might happen' sort of thing.

Really made me anxious in the last couple of weeks.

Anyway had baby on Weds morning at home and lost the HUGE amount of 100mls of blood. The mws were wonderful and calm and made no fuss. I have seen my MW since and she has also been fine. From the sort of comments she makes when she visits i.e. hmm you'd better watch how he is doing that, you will get sore (4th breast feed baby btw)', 'you do look a bit pale (yes I am, I am very white and I have just had a baby!', etc etc. she obviously has to say something about everything! She isnt nasty but not particularly positive.

Please dont get too anxious

mumtotwoboys, don't stress over your notes. They have to cover their arses on those.

If they have not given you the information you need to consent to an intervention (e.g. going into hospital) then it's perfectly reasonable to refuse. The chances are it will make no difference to how they treat you when you come to actually give birth.

FWIW, I had a VBAC six years ago and refused all intervention in the hospital because I wanted a very natural birth - they recommended more monitoring etc. as was their procedure but when I gave informed refusal, they were fine. They wrote down 'Has refused X,Y,Z' but then carried on, treating me normally and letting me have the birth I wanted. It's fine. They just have to prove I requested something out of the ordinary so I can't shout that they didn't follow set guidelines with me.

It doesn't really matter what they put in their notes (unless it's plain wrong). They just have to show they followed guidelines in recommending certain actions. No-one's going to tell you off or say 'Told you so' if you end up transferring (unless they're complete idiots).

I still think it's wrong and unprofessional that they haven't told you what the risks are and what the benefits of a hospital birth would be in your scenario.

Thank you, you guys, those posts really help me

I will pester them to tell me exactly what the risks are (yet again) if I speak to them before birth.
I was due today, may well still be pregnant at next consultant apppointment and will see my usual consultant, she is obviously not anti-homebirth and will hopefully tell me more, although after our last convo I think it's clear there's no real extra risks.
If I bleed a lot I can wait 5 minutes for an ambuliance surely.
My baby is well

I got more relaxing CDs and candles today for birth hehee

Good luck and let us know how it goes!

cor blimey. Good luck for you to get what you want. Coming to this thread a bit late so I hope it all goes well. Must say though scan shows baby dropping down the chart of course they are going to say something/think about doing something. You just got a typical consultant with the bed side manner of something next to useless - I personally wouldnt expect anything more!! My daughter dropped off the chart about 8 months old (from being around 50th centile). It took 2 years, numerous tests, appointments with various doctors, health visitors and consultants for ANYONE to say 'ah well. You know it does happen.......'. Similar situation to yours (except post birth) - there was no other reason to think there was anything wrong.I knew she was just small. Thing is though - the charts are there for a reason. They are an indication and they provide information. My mum always tutted about the fuss made. But I dont envy anyone in the medical profession - most of the time they are damned if they do and damned if they dont. Granted they dont help themselves with their lack of empathy. As a patient I must admit I do try to see through that and go with a gut instinct of whether or not I think they know what they are doing. As for the midwife. When I hear stories about midwifes not keen on homebirths it shouts warning signals to me. I think, she doesn't have the confidence in her own abilities to deliver in whcih case I wouldnt want her anyway....or.....she is maybe thinking. Hmmm, she is due then, we have this many women on our books, I cant tell her no home birth, but then that is two midwives required for one birth leaving everyone else stretched across a potentially large number of other women. Maybe I read much into these attitudes but there will be some reason behind it. Round my area probably 50% of my baby friends have had unplanned home births they are so laid back about getting you into the birthing centre. Had one friend delivered sompletely on her own. Had to let midwife in with baby still attached! ANyway, all good fun. Go on instinct lovey and someone you trust and remember people will not always give us the empathy we might expect and that I am afraid you just have to let slip you by.....

LOL at letting midwife in with baby attached!

I can see how this easily can happen for subsequent baby!

at beatific but firm!

ooh mumoftwoboys - I think the consultant has something to answer for giving so little thought to how trying to pull the rug on your homebirth would make you feel. Mean person. Your dream suggests that the hospital is trying to take action unnecessaraily (plaster your foot when not broken), so trust your instincts and stick to the original plan.

If you have a doula with you she can also help you decide when to call the midwife. I'm 33weeks, hopefully a VBAC, and also intend to labour just with doula as far as possible to avoid overzealous health care professionals (induction with emcs last time).

Remember you don't have to agree to anything you don't want.

:D thankyou

Just saw my delightful midwife, I cannot believe she was warning me my baby could die.
Or not die but suffer brain damage, as they don't carry oxygen with them in the community.
Again, there's absolutely no reason to assume MY baby will be any less likely to breath than another.
I just nodded like yeahhh babies can die, I know.
I kept saying I would like to see a consultant again to find out information on exactly why MY baby would be at any more risk, she said 'and I'm telling you now, I think the baby's small'
Despite last week's scan estimating he's 8lbs, and a scan 4 weeks before esitimating he was 6lbs.
They're all talking crap to me.

If I'm still pregnant on thursday I hope to finally get to the bottom of this with my own consultant, the one who said induction ISN'T necessary and was devoid of knowledge of 'extra risks' there were.

I'm annoyed.
Midwife said placenta may not be working properly, (it was doing fine last thursday!) what's the point of telling me it may not be working but refusing to get me in for another scan to check it?? arg

I'm measuring 34 weeks BTW but again scans show he's in 90th percentile for height and head size, but with an average percentile waist.

I had to ask her 3 times if his head was engaged, she didn't want me to know that he's all in the right position to be born, she obviously wants me to be worrried so I go to hospital.
Then she finally said his head is a bit more down than last week, and last week his head was almost engaged so I had to do the math.
She didn't assure me his heart beat is good, she mumbled 'yeah' when I had to ask!
The only think she was eager to tell me was that my fundus measurement hadnt grown since last week.
She was really friendly though in delivering all her bad news and how my pregnancy isn't normal enough for a homebirth.
and made a point of saying; 'you want your baby to be well don't you'

That's crazy about not carrying oxygen - of course they do. Dd had oxygen in my bedroom after she was born...

silly question, but is there an available midwife who will support the home birth? will it be this one, or someone else?

as I think esme01 makes a good comment

keep us posted, as you are due any day are you not?

I'm 2 days overdue,
just checked myself and I'm 3cms dilated, was only 2cms a few days ago.
Can feel baby's rock hard head when I put fingers through cervix, and there's lots of goo! 'mucus show' that's been coming since yesterday.
Sorry to get all graphic, lol.

One reason I didn't change midwives a few weeks ago is because I was told the midwives were on such an oncall rota that who my midwife was, wouldn't make a difference as to who would actually be coming out to attend the birth.

I'm still quite confident I can do this alone, with them around towards the end for emergency preccautions.
But also half scared into going into the stupid hospital, I don't know..
I will be incredibly stressed out in that place.