Hi there
I have kind of posted about this before but couldn't find my thread to resurrect it. I am currently 38 + 4 weeks with my second baby. I live in Cyprus as DH is with the forces. Due to various problems at our military hospital the theatres are out of action (and have been since November) and so they are not allowing us to deliver our babies there as they say it is not safe as they have no emergency contingency. Consequently we are being sent to Limassol General to deliver as this has been deemed the 'safe' option. I have been for a tour and although I have various problems with it (particularly the delivery suite) it is safe and practical and clean. The problem is that the only form of pain relief they offer is pethadine. There is no gas and air, no epidurals and not even access to a bath. I was lucky enough to have a water birth with dd using gas and air and so pethadine would not be my first choice anyway having not used it last time. They also do not administer it after you are 4 cm dilated so it is likely that when I want the pain relief it will be too late for pethadine anyway. I do have a TENS machine that the hospital have given us but didn't use this last time so don't know how it will help me this time. Basically I am scared that I will not cope and panic. In fact I already am panicking and have had a very emotional few days. This fear of delivery without pain relief is coupled with the fact that enemas, shaving and episiotomies are standard practice in the hospital and although I can say no (and will) and they will follow my wishes I feel I need to be very aware of what is going on around me which is adding to my fears.
Can anyone offer any advice or support? How can I make sure my instincts kick in over the fear?
I think I know that it will all be OK deep down because it has to be and this baby is coming out whether I like it or not but I currently don't feel able to cope very well and am dissolving in tears several times a day and unsurprisingly this is affecting my blood pressure (although not to cause a worry) and I feel will be having an impact on this poor baby. I really don't want to go to this hospital but my hands are tied. (It is also affecting my dd age 2 who knows Mummy is upset.) I am beginning to get quite depressed and feeling hopeless about the whole thing and know that I probably have another two weeks of feeling like this.