First time home birthers and their support squad

[jollyjoanne]

Not a homebirther personally but wanting to offer support to Boobz and others who are going for a home birth . . .

Hiya, just found this thread [waves] I hope I'm not too late to join in and add myself. Good to see so many first timers!

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London

I had a wobble when I didn't see 'my' midwife for a couple of times and was getting the whole 'have you checked with your home insurance company that you're allowed gas and air cannisters?' (btw I have- its fine) or 'what about the snow- we might not get to you' or 'you know most first time homebirths have to transfer anyway?' questions from the old-school Midwife. My DH was so supportive though so we're still go. Fingers crossed she's not on call when I go into Labour!

Hi everyone, just found this thread too and so glad! I'm due tomorrow, which is so exciting but really weird that she might not come for another couple of weeks! I don't know what to do with myself!

My mum had three planned HBs and has been really supportive; DH really not keen but, funnily enough, sold him the idea with the promise of being able to watch the rugby too! Our midwives have all been brilliant as well, but what has really surprised me is that the other pregnant women I know all see HB as scary and dangerous! EVERYONE we talk to is shocked and usually says something ridiculous about safety or something. For such a natural thing, I am stunned at the amount of intervention.

Have added myself to the list too, though grimly expect that I'll still be without child by the time Happyfaces goes into labour

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Boredgirl, DC1 due 15th January, SW London
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London

Gosh, loads of people due so soon! I'm very excited to read all the birth stories - I love a good homebirth story. Rain - sounds like you had a lovely time with your DH - me and my DH need to do more romantic / time-on-our-own stuff, as I fear when there are 2 little critters running around my carpet, there will be even less couple-time.

I am uber excited though - and this is going to sound sick - but I'm really looking forward to the labour and birth again! My friend gave birth in the early hours of this morning (just got the text) and it's made me all nostalgic from when me and DH sent out our texts announcing Penelope's birth, and the birth high hormones running around my body at the time.

Welcome sunnybump and boredgirl - good luck for tomorrow Bored! I went into labour the evening before my due date, so you never know...

Am expecting epic posting whilst labouring on this thread - DH / DP can take over when you're in the really ouchy stages....

boobz it's lovely to have someone so positive and enthusiastic, who's been there and done it. Like a big birthing sister

bored we may end up birthing simultaneously!

i feel like i have let everyone down by going past my due date. friends seem a bit disappointed almost! quite funny really.

anyway it is weird not knowing how much longer - twilight zone...but it's all good. soo much better than being at work!
my community midwife has been so great - i just know i'll probably end up with some old boot who wants to get back home asap and thinks it all a bit silly or something. i'm quite good at shutting people out but at the same time would love to have someone who is really up for it and helpful...we shall see...

Oooh..can I join too please?? I had my first home visit from midwife yesterday, so can now relax in the knowledge that I am having a planned homebirth!! At the start of this pregnancy I was told by midwife we wouldn't discuss homebirths until after 20 week scan...so I was under the impression she was going to try to talk me out of it or tell me after the 20 week scan I had left it too late...she never and it has been soo easy to arrange with her that I can't believe I'm actually going to (hopefully) go ahead with it!!
I have a 2 year old dd, who was born in hospital after a 3 1/2 hour labour, with gas and air...(more gas and air used whilst being stitched than in the actual labour!!), so I'm hoping this labour doesn't last hours and make me realise what a wimp I am!!
If someone could add me to the list I'd be very grateful DC#2 due 28th March, planned home birth, Coventry..thaank you
A wave to Bettymum

Just adding Princess to the list.

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Boredgirl, DC1 due 15th January, SW London
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
PrincessTweetz, DC#2 due 28th March, planned home birth, Coventry
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London

Am soooo bored at home tonight. Wondering if anyone is labouring away and not telling me on here. You better not be. I want live updates, seriously. I'm owed it this time.

Am so pissed off with work at the moment - can't wait to start maternity leave!

Hi all, had my 38 wk (+ 4 days) midwife checkup yesterday: all well, measuring 40cms and baby's head is 2/5ths engaged (he's been like that for about 6 weeks now, lazy boy!)

I'm lucky that our midwife team love home births and actively encourage them. This came as an enormous relief to me after the reaction I had from the referring GP. They do seem to think I'm a bit mad for not wanting a pool, though. It just seems like such a hassle, and I worry that I'd get cold (the bath is never hot enough for me - I'm one of those people who likes to get out looking like a lobster).

Boobz - it's lovely and reassuring to hear how much you are looking forward to the labour. People have told me they think I am being unrealistically optimistic about how wonderful it's all going to be. I'm under no illusions: I know it's going to hurt like buggery, but I just can't help seeing it as a big adventure. I promise to try and post updates on the day, or ask DH to if I'm too busy! I can understand how you must feel about working at the moment - in my last weeks before starting my Mat leave, I just couldn't be bothered. I kept thinking, 'Sod all these spreadsheets... let's get the baby out and play with it!'

Sunnybump - I hope you get a more modern midwife on the day - she sounds a bit nuts!

Fingers crossed that today's the day for BellaBalloon.

Good luck everyone. x

Hello, can I join? Only just found this thread - clearly not been looking properly! I'm due 26th Feb, home birth with a very supportive Community Team in the East Mids. Have one DD (2.5) born in hospital. Was all straightforward so hoping for the same this time.

Welcome, intravenouscoffee!

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Boredgirl, DC1 due 15th January, SW London
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
intravenouscoffee, DC#2 due 26th Feb, planned home birth, E Mids
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
PrincessTweetz, DC#2 due 28th March, planned home birth, Coventry
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London

Oh wow there's loads of us! Can I second the fact it's great to hear you're looking forward to labour Boobz. It's just great to have so much positivity, especially after all the talk of interventions and pain and suffering at the NHS classes. Positive thinking all the way!

Mamalazarou that MW is a bit odd, but the rest of them, and I've met them all now, are lovely, and you always get two so my odds are pretty good! Plus it's going to be in my Birth Plan that only positive supportive attitudes are acceptable so she can be told to bugger off if she's giving it attitude!

Ordered my tens yesterday

Bellaballoon I'm so sure I'm going to go over too. Anything we can do to help? Maybe planning ahead this weeks TV viewing or booking lunch dates, or suggesting good films to watch, or comparing the fine vintages of original vs mint gaviscon!

Morning all. All still quiet on the western front. Midwife told me that all first babies start their journeys into the world at night pretty much since that is when oxytocin levels go up, so I spent most of last night either trying to get comfortable or wondering if each ache and twinge might be that kind of ache and twinge, needless to say it was either just hip pain or where my pjs were digging in!

Totally agree with mamalaz about the adventure aspect. Also just can't for the life of me imagine why you would actually actively want an epidural once you've realised that that involves all those wires and IVs, AND a catheter. I actually would rather have some nasty pain but be able to wander about my own house freely...
HA! I say that now. I really hope I don't have to eat my words!!

I think most MWs these days do really like HBs because they don't have a consultant with a stopwatch peering over their shoulders and contradicting their advice. They can just get on with it. Mine said she still finds them very emotional which is what you want to hear isn't it

Mamalaz i know what you mean about baths but I found when I MC'ed last year that it helped so much that I'm a total convert. Also, to keep the pool warm you - or obviously they just take out bucketfuls and top you up. Your body temperature goes up anyway in labour so apparently you don't really get cold. Anyway you don't have to have a pool obviously. A friend of mine had her backtoback baby at home with no pool and still says that it is by far the most amazing experience of her life, so there you go! (she did confess to asking her MW to cut it out with a knife at one point but isn't that part just called transition dahlings?!!!!

Still can't stay awake through my whole hypno cd...and the end bit is all about dealing with the 'birth sensations' so I should perhaps just forward straight to there whilst awake just so i know what it says. hmm anyway I have guests today but think this weekend I may turn to preparing freezer meals and ipod playlists. The more I think about it the more I like the thought of having earphones in. All the better to shut out the world.

boobz Like I think I said before basically as soon as I found out I was pregnant I stopped being able to concentrate on my work. So I feel your pain

. Check out how this thread has mushroomed in just a few short days. It's brilliant. I love a good birth story too. Actually kind of hoping I have another week to go since only just ready to sit back and cack about a bit, so please feel free to jump in front of me those of you whose 37/8 week pingers have already gone off! xx

Hi Can I join too??
I'm 16 weeks pregnant with my 3rd dc and have just managed to get DF round to my way of thinking re a home birth. I'm due on 28th June in Wiltshire.
It's lovely reading everyone's storys and I'm glad I found this thread today.
I'm going on a Doula training course in March as this is something I want to do in the near future, but also because I want a home birth I think it might be quite helpful for me.

Boobz & BellaBalloon I'm with you on the not being able to concentrate on work- and I've still got ages to go!

Bella you sound so postive, it's lovely . I hope everything goes really smoothly for you, you have a good attitude which I'm sure helps.
I must say though that I had an 82 hour or so labour which did end up in hospital, and the epidural was the best thing that ever happened to me in my life at that point . I didn't fancy it at all either but it let me relax at last, it was quite surreal lying there with no pain and the synotocin drip in, letting it do its thing while I closed my eyes and DH chatted away with the midwives till it was time to push.
Also the temperature thing, maybe I'm a freak but my temperature plummeted, we have a wood burning stove and it was stoked up to the max and I couldn't move more than about 2 feet away from it or I'd get icy cold and start shivering. Apparently DH had turned the heating off and opened the windows in the other rooms as he was absolutely boiling .
Hi princess!!

Hi bettymum I am sure that if i have been going for as much 24 hours i will be begging for an epidural. I just meant i wouldn't be craving one before labour has even begun as some people do. In fact I will be desperate for one during labour no doubt, but will just have to suck it up and deal with it if I am at home. I am deffo not out for any medals. If the pain is unbearable at any time I will be requesting a transfer. I just hope that I don't get to that stage.

Interesting about the feeling cold thing. Obviously all the guff i spout is purely anecdotal. I hate feeling the cold and my oH loves a breeze too. Will have to issue advance warnings to him about that. If he starts opening any windows he will be denied access to his child!

welcome wheremyfeet!

I'll have the epidural, please - only, I don't want to wait until labour, I would like to have one tonight at bedtime so I can actually get a decent night's sleep!

I'm not after medals, either, just want to see if I can do it by myself, and I'm just more likely to do that at home than in hospital. All women who give birth are warriors IMO, epidural or none!

epidurals are funny things, my SIL has just had her second baby and basically demanded one as soon as she arrived in hospital. I'd rather wait and see how things went, I really wouldn't want one unless I needed it, despite having had one once. I felt decidedly odd for a good week afterwards and DD was very sleepy and we found it very hard to BF initially, who knows if it was down to all the drugs (I'd had two shots of pethidine by this stage as well!) or if it would have happened like that anyway. I'm certainly hoping that next time I'll manage with just the TENS and a big of G&A .
Have a lovely weekend everyone, will be thinking of you Bella!!

Just a quick post to say I'm thinking of you Bella - hoping your labour starts soon so you can meet your baby! As a fellow first timer I also find it's all such a big adventure. I'm so excited to meet our baby, this brand new person that I've been growing for the last 7.5 months, that I'm actually looking forward to labour (which makes me sound mad!)...Also thinking of boredgirl and our other ladies due soon (yup, that means you MamaL and Happyfaces ).

Really looking forward to hearing how things go for you all - the first wave of babies due since Boobz revived this thread! Very exciting indeed...

Anyway, just cleared my desk as I'm swapping with a colleague from Monday so I can sit next to my maternity cover (she starts Monday - woo hoo!) for our handover. I feel really good about the amount of de-cluttering I've done...definitely in the count-down to maternity leave now. This time in 3 weeks I'll be finished my last day at work...now if every week goes as swiftly as this past one time should fly by!

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend and will be checking in for any interesting labour updates

Last time I posted I couldn't even come up with a due date - I've got one now, an updated list:

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Boredgirl, DC1 due 15th January, SW London
Motherofsnortpigs, DC3 due 18th January, Oxon
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
intravenouscoffee, DC#2 due 26th Feb, planned home birth, E Mids
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
PrincessTweetz, DC#2 due 28th March, planned home birth, Coventry
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London
Wheredidmyfeetgo, DC3 due 28th June, Wiltshire

Hmm...is that Monday? I am so tired I am not sure. Anyway, thought I was going into labour in Sainsburys last night, but didn't - phew. I had that sensation and my brain went, 'O I remember this now'. Like a few others here, I just can't wait - giving birth to DD2 was so amazingly brilliant that I really want to do it again. Can't be much longer, I hope.

Sending positive labouring vibes to all you January mummies-to-be.

Afternoon ladies,
So... a day overdue and no sign - spent all night last night wondering if every twinge was one of 'those' twinges, so totally feel your pain, Bella. DD was SO active all night, though, and I've heard that they're supposed to be still for the day or so before the birth as they're getting ready, is that true? If so, very upsetting as I have the most active baby in the world and she's showing no signs of slowing down.

Re the pool issue, we're not having one - DH absolutely overruled on the grounds that he'd have to empty it! Also, I have to say, I'm also one of those for whom the bath is never hot enough, and I didn't fancy lukewarm water either! I'm also much more of a walker, so figured I'd rather be up and about the house. I didn't get a TENS as when we tried them in NCT I really wasn't keen, but now wondering if I should have got one anyway, just in case? I probably still have time to.

Another questrion for all of those more experienced MTB, I've had loads of backache the last day and a half, is that a positive sign, or is it my wishful thinking?

Anyone have any tips on staying busy? I'm finding that I can't concentrate on anything at all unless it's baby related, which is limiting my activities a little! Spent most of the evening yesterday dreaming up middle names, but there's only so many times you can go through the book...

Hope everyone else is having a good weekend, thinking of you Bella

Yes, get a TENS. I swore by it - got me through 70+ hours of labour before cracking open the gas and air. You might not like it, but then you can stick it on Ebay if you don't use it!

Please can I join too? had DD1 in birth centre 22 months ago and am due 4th March with DD2. Really hoping for a home birth (tbh they would have to drag me into hospital kicking and screaming unless there was a valid medical reason for it!) bit worried cos my usual midwife has gone on long-term sick leave, leaving me seeing a different mw at every appointment!

I've added myself to the list XX

BellaBalloon, DC 1 due 12 January, planned home waterbirth, London
Boredgirl, DC1 due 15th January, SW London
Motherofsnortpigs, DC3 due 18th January, Oxon
Happyfaces, DC1 due 20 January, planned home birth, Cambridgeshire
MamaLazarou, DC#1 due 24th Jan, planned home birth, Kent
Raindroprhyme, DC#3 due 2nd February, planned HB, South West Scotland
Comeonbishbosh, DC#1 due 7th Feb, planned home waterbirth, Sheffield.
Sunnybump DC#1 due 18th Feb planned home water birth, NE Scotland.
intravenouscoffee, DC#2 due 26th Feb, planned home birth, E Mids
Caitni, DC #1 due 2 March, planned home waterbirth, North London
Heth1980, DD2, due 4th March, planned home birth, Birmingham
PrincessTweetz, DC#2 due 28th March, planned home birth, Coventry
Bettymum, DC#2 due 7 April, planned home birth, Berkshire
Toady, DC#4 due 17th April, home birth, Torquay
Boobz, DC#2 due June 9th, planned home waterbirth, South London
Wheredidmyfeetgo, DC3 due 28th June, Wiltshire

Welcome Heth1980 - and tried not to worry about seeing different midwives every time. I had the same midwife for every ante natal appointment, who was very pro homebirths, had delivered my friend's baby at home etc, and in the end, she was not on call when I got into established labour. And none of the team community midwives were on duty either, so they had to send someone out from the hosptial, and in the end, both the midwives who came were AMAZING and I couldn't have asked for better care. I was disappointed on the night that it wasn't going to be "my" midwife, but by the morning and DD's actual entrance into the world, I was so thankful I had had the women I'd had.

Boredgirl - it doesn't sound like it will be too long. I started having back cramps in the morning, lost my plug by 11am, and then started having regular contractions from about 4pm (was out walking the dog when the first one came)! So not long now, I'm sure of it.... good luck... come and tell us how it's going...

Bella - All I would say about epidurals and pain relief, is that you think you can stand it no more, and then you push yourself that little bit further... or that's how it worked for me. I know for sure if I'd been in the hospital, I would have had pain relief come the Sat morning (not that I think they would have allowed me to go that long without intervention anyway had I been in hospital), but because I was at home and no pain relief was available (except G&A from 4cm), I kept saying to myself "I'll do one more hour of this and see whether I can stand it no more"... and then another hour passed, and another, and another, and then DD was finally here!

Also, I think you need to have loads of distractions to act as pain relief as well - massage, homeopathy, aromatherapy, tens, visualisations, yoga (seriously!), water (hot power shower at base of spine)... they all go some way to working through the peak of pain at the height of the contraction.

I also really liked the advice I had from someone on here about knowing that there was a beginning, a middle and an end to each contraction, and counting backwards from 30 at the beginning and getting to 0 at the end... - all to distract me from the sensations.

All sounds a bit hippyish now, don't I?

boobz no you don't sound hippyish at all - at least not in a bad way. I agree with everything you say. I just meant that I am sure that I will think I can't take the pain but in fact in reality we all can because were built to withstand it aren't we! YEAH!!!. My friend who was transferred said that there was something about being in hospital that immediately made her want all the drugs on offer whereas at home she knew she could keep going.

What yoga did you do? I love a bit of yoga me. I have the tara lee video though it's a bit long and boring so have only done it a few times.

I am getting back pain but only from sitting typing awkwardly! Kept me up half the night though
I have a feeling it's going to be a long old wait. I have an appointment next thurs when I will be 40 + 9. Should i have a sweep? Really really really don't want to have to be induced. There are so few happy stories from labours that were induced...

Love that 30 to 0 thing will definitely try to remember that!

Ps what did those of you who have birthed in water wear if anything? Think i may start off with a t shirt but imagine ending up in the old birthday suit...is that about right?? With a towelling dressing gown to put on for trips to the bathroom??

Forgot to say to bored welcome to the twilight zone!
and heth i too have seen the same MW the whole way through but know now that it is very unlikely that I will have her for my birth but am encouraged that boobz had some pros albeit unknown ones when the time came cos had been feeling sad about that too.

Apart from the fact that I can now no longer move - how big is this baby!?!?? - i can still hang on for a few more days. still a bit nervous about how much my life is about to change. I am quite a lazy person naturally. Will i ever be able to lie in bed and read a book again!??!

OoooH! can i join you ladies too please?

im due march 4th - but have a suspicion this one will be early and im looking to have a homebirth (no pool). and im in cornwall.

my midwife has been really supportive so far and it was actually she who suggested it as my DS's birth (he is now 3) was so straightforward with just G&A.

my friend has had two homebirths and she has agreed to be with me, as my sort of birthing partner i suppose as DH is quite frankly a bit rubbish! .

strangely im really looking forward to the birth too, but im currently trying to convince baby to trun as i think she is back to back. MW is coming to do my birthplan next week.