First time home birthers and their support squad

[jollyjoanne]

Not a homebirther personally but wanting to offer support to Boobz and others who are going for a home birth . . .

Congratulations UnrequitedSkink, what a lovely story and inspirational for those of us aspiring to a home birth.

Enjoy your new baby :-)

Congratulations Justbeme and UnrequiredSkink. Nice to hear such positive stories - even if Justbeme's wasn't quite as she hoped.

I'm still "intact" so to speak. Baby is obviously far too happy in her nest. I had a sweep yesterday afternoon but midwife didn't think it would achieve much as my cervix was still slightly posterior - but on the plus side I am 40% effaced & 1cm dilated which for a first timer is apparently good... unless they were just saying that to be encouraging.... which I am suspecting is the case as we've not even a sniff of action since. She also said she was surprised I wasn't waddling with the baby where it is - which I hope means that I have an accommodating pelvis.... But again, all pregnancies seem to be so different I don't really think anyone can say what's going to happen for sure. Sigh..... SOOOOO IMPATIENT NOW. COME ON, CHILD. It's a beautiful day out here.

Many Congrats Unrequited!!
I spoke to my MW today and she said re Hypno birthing - pushing to deliver is required rather than the "nudging" they suggest, otherwise the baby might never come out naturally. I think the relaxing parts and visualising etc did help in my labour - but there's no way I would have been able to block out the pain the whole way through. She said I managed to go nearly the whole labour just breathing and only used gas and air near the very end. Maybe the last hour or so I think.

Still waiting here. Only five days until my Homebirth "runs out". Got a periody feeling tonight - but based on previous times I've had it, I'm kinda expecting it to wear off in my sleep. Bouncing on my ball and twiddling to try to get things going a bit. Fingers crossed....

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful babies justbeme and UnrequitedSkink and thinking of you shipsladyg will be keeping fingers crossed for you too

Had a trial run of my birth pool in a box today and it was lovely. Took just over 2 hours to set up and fill. Glad we did a trial run, feel more confident we know what we are doing now.

Feel excited and nervous at same time, these mix of emotions and new emotions are mind blowing at times!

Well done hippopo. I loved getting the birth pool out for its trial run. Obviously I had a sit in it too. It made it seem all normal. It's really nice to know what to expect. And I know what you mean about emotions. It's all a bit crazy at times.

Still no action here. Hopefully I can get another sweep at my monitoring session today.

Congratulations justbeme! It sounds like, despite not having your homebirth, everything went well and you were happy with the birth. No name yet?? And nearly 9lbs ? what a good weight.

And congrats to you too unrequitedskink - what an amazing story; and just 2.5 hours from start to finish. I thought I was doing well with just 6 or so hours of established labour, but I?m very impressed. Another one with no name? We can?t update the list without names...

Argh, so frustrating ships - I can feel your pain. Fingers crossed your sweep goes well and kicks things off for you.

Connie is doing fab ? although I guess I was expecting her to be exactly like Penelope in her feeding and sleeping habits, but she?s definitely her own person and does things a bit differently. She managed to projectile vomit all over the photographer taking her passport snaps this morning... poor guy. Must have been at least a pint of (breast) milk ? yuk! Penny is taking to her sister very well and all is pretty relaxed right now. Ask me whether I still think that though, when DH returns to Sudan on Thursday for 7 weeks.... eeek.

No action from the sweep. Seems that my cervix is far too posterior. boooooo. I'm taking great heart in RnB's birth story and holding on to the knowledge that whatever happens, the end result is the same and I will meet little one at the weekend. Just coz I don't have a homebirth that we hoped for, doesn't make the wonder of the event any less.

shipsladyg Whilst your Midwifery team may have a 'cut off date' for homebirth as a protocol, it is still within your rights to decline their advice and state that you intend to wait to go into labour and birth your baby at home after that date.
The consultant midwife at my local hospital agreed to attend one of the women from my homebirth support group at home till 43 weeks.
Is the cut off point 40+10 or 42 weeks?
the World heaklth organisation (and Wales) count normal pregnancy from 37-42 weeksd of pregnancy, and some women just always go over, not because there is anything wrong, its just normal for their body.
Do not feel presurrised into induction or having a hospital birth unless thats your informed choice!
Selina x

More info here-
www.homebirth.org.uk/overdue.htm

Selina

Thanks Selina. My consultant first suggested induction at my 40wk appt for 41+3 by dates, in the knowledge that by scan, I would be 42+1. He was content to leave it to 42wks by dates so that I can exploit their policy on homebirth to the limit (which is 42+5 by scan). I've been borderline hypertensive so the midwives have been quite twitchy with me for the last two months anyway (although his comments have been that my results have been "unexciting") so to get them to agree to post dates and borderline hypertension (touch of white coat syndrome!) and higher BMI could possibly be seen as being unreasonable.

Anyway - it's taken me a good while to get my head around the concept of a hospital birth. The consultant has been an absolute gem and has written all over my notes and hospital notes that he's happy for me to try for as natural a birth possible and to use the birthpool assuming baby is happy. I think the consultant realises that as I had quite bad depression all last year, to feel that I've had a good crack at being "normal" is immensely significant for me. He's obviously been around the block a while and I trust his judgement (Shame he won't be there on the day) I can't really ask for more and will have to hope that on Friday night/Saturday morning there will be a relaxed, supportive, common sense team who trust their clinical experience without feeling constricted by "guidelines".

I'm quite disappointed that my body hasn't lined itself up properly so things would start on their own and let us have a home birth. But I'm feeling more focused and chilled now that I know that little one will be with us on Saturday sometime. Still - one more chance at a sweep tomorrow and homebirth is still possible until Friday tea time; but not holding out much hope as the other three sweeps have been sensationless and I haven't had any niggles at all.

Maybe our next child will be a homebirth.

Thinking of you shipsladyg

All the best

Thinking of you today Ships - you may even have a brand new baby in your arms right now. I hope you did go into labour naturally yesterday, and got your homebirth, but if you didn't and had the induction today, I'm sure you'll still have had an amazing experience and a beautiful little newborn at the end of it!

DH left to go back to Sudan on Thursday, so am now looking after Penny and Connie on my own. Tis very tiring.

Hi EmsieRo - welcome to the thread! I had my baby (my second homebirth) 5 weeks ago, but still check this thread to follow everyone else's progress and to pitch in with advise when I can. Congrats on deciding on a homebirth - they're the best.

As for your first question, there are loads of suggestions on this thread, and the original homebirth thread here:

Home birth thread 1

...but if you can't be bothered to trawl through both threads, these would be my top tips to have handy:

-- Music
-- Lavender oil (to burn)
-- Easy food to eat which DH/DP should prepare for you (although at some points it will feel impossible to eat, you really have to, as you burn so much energy)
-- Clean sheets on your bed to climb in to after the birth
-- Nice big fluffy dressing gown to put on after birth and for first feed with the baby
-- Old towels and sheets

I've made this list before which is much longer but as the second birth was so much quicker than the first, these were the things I actually appreciated for #2. Hopefully you'll have a quick birth first time around!

As for the second question, I'm afraid I don't have any experience as didn't transfer, but I do have a point of view on the pain and coping with it. I held out both times until about 5-6cm before having gas and air, and believe it or not, both times the MWs ran out of it when I got to about 8cm (how can lightening strike twice?) I had to wait over an hour with excruciating contractions until the next cannister could be delivered, and you DO cope. They are like nothing you've ever imagined, but they do have a beginning and an end, and you know that it will all finish soon enough and you will have a gorgeous baby in your arms. Don't underestimate what you can do... I had a 4 day latent labour with DD1 and after constant contractions and no sleep, I said to DH "I can't do this - I want to go to hospital" and DH said "let's do another hour and see how you feel then"... I held out the hour and then he would distract me with food or massage or a walk around the block and suddenly it was 5 hours later, I was finally 4cm and established labour kicked in (allowing me to have G&A and then things really sped up and baby was born less than 8 hours later). So you do manage - even when you think you can't, you can and it's so amazing to know you did it and did it in your own home. And then you're all snuggled up in your own bed with DH and a glass of champagne and it's MAGICAL.

Any other advice? Don't tell people you are in labour - wait at least a few hours after you've had the baby to announce it to everyone... you only get those quiet first few hours once (especially as it's your first... when it's your second, you've got #1 to think about as soon as #2 has popped out!)

Good luck - do come back and post your experience on here when LO arrives.

EsieRo - Just wanted to say that I had my DD (first baby) at home 3 weeks ago. I also live in a small flat so could not have a pool. It was an amazing experience and would highly reconmend HB to all.

The things that we used the most:-

• I gave birth on my bed - I had a waterproof sheet with an old sheet on top, both were chucked.
• Straws - V. important as it was stinking hot (and may be for you too!), the only way I could drink was my DH holding a drink with a straw in it.
• Desk fan - again because it was so hot
• Jelly babys
• Pillows and pillow cases you don't care about getting a bit 'messy'
• Towels - I got a load from Tesco - their value range, washed and tumble dried they came up nice and soft.

Good luck

Hello all ? how have people been getting on? What happened to you Ships - come back and tell your story! And what about you Hippopo - how did it go?

Connie is growing like a weed ? can?t believe it?s been over 6 weeks since the birth. We?re gearing up for our big move, but trying to enjoy a tiny baby at the same time.

Updated list!

Due

Shipsladyg, due June 6th
Smurf26, DC#2 due 8 June, planned home birth
Wheredidmyfeetgo, DC#3 due 28 June, planned home birth, Wiltshire
Hippopo, DC1 due 9 July, planned home water birth, North London
Heather1980, DC#3 due September, planned home birth

Arrived

Happyfaces, DC#1 arrived 12 January, induction at 39 weeks due to Cholestasis, Cambridgeshire
Motherofsnortpigs, Humphrey Peter David arrived 20 January at home (very quick labour!)
MamaLazarou, DC#1 arrived 20 January, transfer due to transverse lie.
Bellaballoon, DC#1 arrived 24 January at home.
SouthWestWhippet, Francesca arrived 30 January, transfer due to established labour not kicking in
Raindroprhyme, Seth Cooper arrived 1 Feb, transfer due to lack of midwives (nice hospital birth)
Comeonbishbosh, Iris Anna arrived 3 Feb at home
Verylittlecarrot, Boy arrived 6 Feb at home
Heth1980, Girl, arrived 12 Feb in hospital due to pre term arrival
Twofalls, Polly arrived 26 Feb at home
intravenouscoffee, James, arrived 2 March at home
Mad4mainecoons, Holly Eleanor arrived 13 March, lovely home birth, Cornwall
Caitni, Richard Walter arrived 16 March, by C-section
Donttrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis arrived 18 March, transfer due to lack of progression
PrincessTweetz, Jude Allistair Charles arrived 23 March at home, Coventry
Opalfruity, Baby girl arrived on time 28 March, lovely home birth
Bettymum, Alexander arrived 19th April, transfer due to lack of progression but lovely hospital experience none the less, Berkshire
Flybynight, Flora arrived 1 May, lovely home birth, Leeds
rlp, Thomas Henry, arrived 8 May, lovely home birth
Morethemerrier, Girl arrived 17 May, at home. Details needed!
Boobz, Constance Ella Reed (Connie) arrived on due date, 9th June, lovely home birth, South London
Unrequitedskink, Boy, arrived 9th June, very quick homebirth!
Justbeme, Boy, arrived 11th June, born in hospital.

So nearly 6 months since my last post on this thread... I wonder what happened to those who were still due - did you get your homebirth ladies? Come back and tell your stories Ships, Smurf, Wheredidmyfeetgo, Hippopo and Heather.

Penelope, Connie, DH and I have now been in Sudan for 4 months. It's knackering have 2 kids 14 months apart. Especially in this heat. But will defo be back on this thread when we plan #3 and have our next homebirth...

Oh wow, its a bit of a blast from the past to see this thread pop up to the top of the list again. I was on the last 'first time' thread last year and the product of my wonderful homebirth is now an opinionated and stubborn 15 month old.

Nice to see you again Boobz, it was your experience and encouragement that helped me decide on a homebirth myself and I am very glad I did-my experience was even featured in someone's dissertation on pleasurable birth. I can't imagine how tired you must be though with two so close together in the heat-credit to you for thinking of number 3, think the boat has well and truly sailed on that one here!

Just checked the thread again, must be exhausted but I am on this thread and my birthstory is too. Think I need to head off to bed!

ooh. Hello boobz How's life with 2? Going to have a scroll back in a mo' and find your birth story. The big news here is that we are expecting another in June. Shall I start a list?!

Looks like you will have a similar age gap to me then Mother! Tis knackering. But only another 6 months and then COnnie will be walking and then they can entertain each other! (or this is what I am hoping for...)

Start the list! I will be on it again myself eventually ;)

That's a good birth boobz. I loved the bit about being under a tree in the rain. The age gap between my DD's is 18 months and that was pretty tough. I'm sure you're doing a great job; and you're right, they do play together. I am often told to go away - shame! There'll be 16 and a bit months between Humphrey and 'rabbit'. I'm hoping it's nearer 17 though or I'll miss my SIL's wedding. The MW has said she will come to Bournemouth for the weekend of the wedding just in case. On phone, so hard to do formatting - will start some stats this evening. Are you staying in Sudan for Christmas? DH has a plan that involves seeing everyone either of us is vaguely related to - oh joy!

Hey Motherofsnortpigs - your baby must be due now - have you had him / her yet?

I am reviving this thread, yet again, because you guessed it, #3 is on its way and of course we'll be gunning for homebirth #3! Both my babies (Penelope and Connie) were born at home and I had live labour threads - both the last one and this current one (although Connie is a year old now, so it needs to be brought back to life!)

Added complication this time is that I now live in Sudan, so will have to come back to the UK at 36 weeks to then get my homebirth. Lots to logistically work out, including getting me, 2 kids and my bump back before baby is born and look after them all on my own in rented accomodation waiting for #3 to arrive. Very exciting.

3 under 3 can't be that hard, can it? Hmmm. Also hoping to go back to university to retrain as a midwife from September next year, so it's going to be a busy 2012...

Anyway, I'd like this to become a general homebirther thread again, rather than just my labour thread, so if anyone else is planning for a homeirth, have a read of the original thread here:

Original Homebirth Thread

and the rest of this thread, for loads of inspirational birth stories, what-do-I-need-for-a-homebirth-lists, advice on how to handle unsupportive hospitals and midwives, websites, book lists etc - just so much information on this thread and the original one. Have a look for inspiration!

So, a new list:

DUE

Motherofsnortpigs, due June, DC2
Boobz, due March 2012, DC3