If you had an episiotomy with first birth, what happened second time?

[CoteDAzur]

Please tell.

Obstetrician said that there is a 50% (!!!) chance I will need/have an episiotomy this time because I had one last time. Something about the scar tissue not stretching.

I'm freaking out like you would not believe

Thanks warthog, that is what I was trying to ask

Episiotomy the first time around after dd1's heart rate started to drop. No stitches at all with dd2, who was bigger (8lb 2oz, as opposed to 7lb 8oz). So it's definitely not inevitable - best of luck!

Thank you for all these positive second experiences. It helps to hear it's not all doom and gloom out there.

i had a nightmare first labour/birth. i had an epesiotomy and forceps. Ds ended up in special care for the night.

DD i tore slightly but nothing that even warrented anything doing.

Had an episiotomy with DD1 (I really, really didn't want one but her heart rate had dropped and it was all panicky); DD2 and DD3, no episiotomy and no tearing and they were bigger.

I had forceps delivery first time with 15 stitches. Next time I had a very tiny tear which healed itself.

Very encouraging second time experiences

I'm actually feeling more optimistic following my appointment with maternity psychologist today. Not because of anything she has said, but because she has been going around talking to my doctor, midwives, etc and hopefully that means I will not be ignored in agony like last time, in the very least. At best, my wishes might actually be respected.

first baby was 9lb12,had failed ventouse followed by forceps so episiotomy-which was hideous,didn't/couldn't look after baby due to the agony of it,it got infected,had some restitching and was eventually cauterized as it wouldn't heal-it was horrific and i could feel lumps and bumps for about 3 years afterwards.FFWD 13 years and I decide to go for it again (think i may have had PTSD after the first one as was unable to visit people with new babies unless they'd emerged unscathed-if i knew they had stitches i'd come out in a cold sweat and go light headed) anyway- 2nd baby-was traumatized and considering terminating as i couldn't go through it again-was having panic attacks and fainting at any appointment i had-consultant said i could have c section if i was sure i couldn't go through it again) had growth scans etc etc,they told me she'd be around about 11lb at birth, i FREAKED- ended up doing relaxation/NCT classes and delivered a 9lb8 baby with nothing-no gas and air,no drugs,no intervention-nothing-not a stitch-felt far more in control by the time i got to being in labour and was due for an induction the next day-keen to avoid this i made my lovely boy have sex with me and then take me to the park for a few hours-went on the swings and on the slide and bobs your uncle by the time i got home my twinges were developing-did this ridiculous self created almost hypnosis and would go for a homebirth next time. You can do it-i'd resist intervention (question to ask is 'what happens if we do nothing and how long do i have to decide what to do)good luck

1st baby - episiotomy, agony, 8lb 8oz baby

2nd baby - not a single tear, 9lb 6oz baby !!!

3rd baby - no tear, 7lb 8oz

Think your body know what to do much more second time around and I was more relaxed. good luck XXX

Cote, my sister had a huge episiotomy first time round, was completely traumatised. I had an elective c-s in November, and though the first couple of days ARE very painful, I felt quite normal on Day 3, though obviously a bit weak and not good on my pins. I think we would both say I had the better deal and feel extremely positive about the birth (I'd have another one in a heartbeat, major abdominal surgery or not). HOWEVER, as a point of interest, my sister had her second child vaginally, didn't need another episiotomy and found it ok. Hang in there.

3 babies here -

1. induced, episiotomy and forceps. As ghastly a labour as it comes. I shudder to think of it. ds 8 1/2 lbs. Couldn't walk comfortably for weeks, let alone sit down.

2. very fast totally out-of-control labour. 2nd degree tear. Running to see a digger with ds1 only 24 hours after the birth. ds2 9 lbs.

3. home birth. hypnobirthing 4 hour labour. No tears, and could have taken ds1 to school 3 hours after delivery but dh offered to do it, and I decided to stay at home! dd 9 lbs.

Also, I'm pretty small - 5'2" and only weigh about 45kg so have incubated pretty large babies and delivered them well.

Personally I think the difference came in feeling in control, being upright (sorry, French doctors but lying on your back is a dreadful way to get a baby out) and keeping calm.

A friend had 2 very bad 3rd degree tears with first 2 babies and was advised to have cs with 3rd to avoid risk of incontinence. Incontinence issues are not usually raised here (no one ever mentioned them to me) unless you have pretty severe trauma to the area, like my friend.

Good luck, and I'm sure you'll be fine. Just insist on being upright, take your time in labour, breathe the baby down, and don't listen to scissor happy doctors.

sleepless - That sounds similar to my state of mind although I haven't fainted yet. Turned on the taps and cried a river to several people at hospital who dared mention the words birth, episiotomy, or stitches, though. Thank you for your encouraging story.

I don't know about going down a slide when 40 weeks pregnant, though

I had episiotomy first time round along with a 2nd degree tear. Second time I tore along the same places (from the original tear and where I was cut)

I had episiotomy first time round along with a 2nd degree tear. Second time I tore along the same places (from the original tear and where I was cut)

Which was worse - episiotomy or tear? (In terms of pain & recovery)

Doctor is scaring me with prospects of tearing, saying a tear is much worse.

First time (episiotomy) I really felt the swelling. I couldn't sit or stand without holding my hands there, was awful.
Second time (tear) no where near as bad. Ds2 is 6 days old and that part of me feels fine. There was no stinging when I went to the toilet, I could sit, stand, lay anyway for however long and felt nothing (it's everything else that hurts atm)

LadyThompson - If bump is another 4 kg baby, I am going for an elective c-section. Already cried spoke to doctor about it, and he agreed.

Had hideous delivery first time with massive episiotomy that had a haematoma, took bloody ages to heal. Second time much easier, tore a bit, stitches, healed quickly.

I'm not really into alternative remedies but I put a little lavender oil in the bath and Midwife was really impressed how well I healed after the episiotomy.

My tear healed much quicker than my cut - in fact I remember that you were one of the people who supported me when my episiotomy was taking forever to heal (thank you!). My tear wasn't great, but was much less painful much quicker and has responded really well to cortisone.

Just a thought - the one thing that really got me through my second laobur was knowing that DH really understood all my issues and the reasons behind my decisions. He could then back me 100% and I trusted him completely during labour. It gave me much more courage knowing that I was not alone. It took a lot of talking and looking at evidence and talking to midwives for him to get it though - I think that he was shocked at how ignorant he'd been first time around (despite going to all the antenatal classes!).

costagirl - I had haematoma with episiotomy, as well.

Does anyone know why one gets a haematoma?

Tore along the scar, but MUCH less repair work needed than the first time.

christy - I wouldn't have been able to lower myself into the bath, nor 'sat' in it, in at least the week following DD's birth. I remember taking showers my legs apart and crying with pain as I tried to wash the area

honest cote-i was absolutely terrified-beyond terrified-just decided i was going for full on medical delivery if it looked like i'd need any intervention or wanted nothing and to be honest-i am a right fucking wuss-but managed it by staying focused and (i am going to sound like a hippy now and i am really not one)breathing/visualizing the end result-another thing that really helped was my position-i was doing 'hula hooping' movements and was upright for most of it-baby was almost born down the loo but other than that it was a cinch-shortly after delivering her i was in the bath with her being cuddled by her dad sat on the loo chatting to me,we had a picnic and waited the prescribed 6 hours and went home-the total opposite to last time and just a really wonderful experience-i feel a bit teary for you being so upset but honestly-i totally empathise with you and want to try and reassure you it can be a totally different experience second time round x

Cote - no episiotomy second time round, less tearing and baby was 2lbs 8oz bigger than the first!