mum's who've had epidurals - would you have another one?????

[liznay]

I'm having my first baby in 12 weeks or so and having watched around 100 births now on Discovery H&H i'm convinced that I'm going to have an epidural.

Why is every (wo)man and his dog trying to talk me out of it though? I don't understand why someone would want to be in that much pain when you can choose not to?
I know there are risks attached to having an epidural but some people have said I won't be able to push the baby out.
I was under the illusion that women have given birth whilst in a coma, so why wouldn't the contractions ease the baby down the birth canal?

If you've had an epidural or if you had both a natural birth and an epidural to compare the two - would you have another one?

I had an epidural with DS (after 42 hours of agonising OP labour I was only 3cm dilated and exhausted) and it did work but I really hope not to have one this time around.

It killed the pain but left me immobilised on a bed with my legs akimbo, my contractions stopped and I ended up having a ventouse and episiotomy.

There are LOADS of other pain relief options so why not see how you go, you might have a quick labour where you only have time for G&A!

I had one with my first
The cord was round his neck 3 times and I had to have a surgeon shove something up me to attach something or other to his head to onitor him
I definitely needed one
The downside was 2 days in hospital
Having 2 midwives help me to the loo
Not being able to get up myself to get the baby out of the see through cot thing to feed in the night - had to ring the bell and wait for someone to pass him to me while he yelled his head off and woke up everyone else

2nd time, natural birth, much quicker recovery etc
But I still maintain I needed that epidural for the first
My mate managed all the way through without one until afterwards when she needed loads of stitches she had to have one anyway

Hope I haven't scared the bejesuses out of you

I spent the entire first birth begging for an epidural.

Empowered, knowledgable and supported I didn't with my second.

IMO & IME there are worst things and more scary things surrounding childbirth than the pain, and a good number of these are INCREASED when you go down the epidural route.

I would. I had one with ds1 but couldn't with ds2, even though I was desperate (no-one to administer it). I was told that they would have to let the epidural wear off for the end part but I had emergency cs in the end.

I've had two, the first time was told to as it was such a long labour so I was tired by the time I delivered. I had to have a ventouse because the position you are in with an epidural isn't the best to get the baby out. Second time I had one by choice as ds2 was back to back, induced and large! No other intervention this time.

Of course you can get your baby out but it isn't the easiest position that's all. Mind you I don't think there are any easy ways! Good luck and ignore the wo(men) and their dogs. Yes there are risks but you are an intelligent woman in charge of her body!

But don't some people have epidurals, and it just wears off after giving birth, and they are fine?

I am with OP - can't see why I wouldn't have an epidural. If contractions stopped etc is that definitely down to the epidural?

Sometimes it does seem that other women really feel you should suffer when giving birth, as though you are less of a woman for opting for pain relief...

I had an epidural for my first baby (emergency C-section) and was extremeley grateful for it by that stage.

For DD2 I was advised to have an elective C-section, and was therefore given a Spinal Block (similar to epidural, but can't be topped-up, apparently) and I was relieved to have such good medical advice.

Both DDs were fine, I was fine and if I'd gone on to have another I would have no hesitation in having another epidural/spinal block if required.

Yes planning on having a 2nd one

but its not without its negatives

Mine resulted in contractions stopping-oxytocin drip- episiotomy and ventouse delivery- unable to walk for 24 hours- midwifes cleaning me, taking me to toilet and unable to lift dd to bf.

Having said all that I was induced due to 14 days late so I beleive the pain would have been worse than if I had gone into natural labour.
If I go into natural labour this time around I plan to see how I get on before I ask for epidural, but at 4cm dilated last time I was screaming for the "fucking epidural NOW"

MoonlightMcKenzie - in your post you mention there are worse and more scary things than pain which are increased by an epidural - what are they?

I had one with DD, after 8 hours of labour I was only 4cm dilated and they wanted to put me on a drip to strenghten the contractions. The doctor offered an epidural in the same breath (seeing my wide eyed panicked look). It was great, it gave me the breathing space I needed. It wore off just as I needed to push and I had no aftereffects at all, was up on my feet and wandering around in no time.

I would have had one for DS but ended up with a CS.

And stop watching those childbirth programmes, they scared the bejeesus out of me.

I have had both. With dd I was induced and the process wasn't really explained to me beforehand, and nor did they tell me that dd was back to back. I ended up in terrible pain and pretty much strapped to the bed because of all the monitors etc that had to be in place because of the induction (which was only because I was about 9 days overdue, no other medical reason for it.) By the time the anesthatist (sp) arrived I had been asking for an epidural for well over an hour and had finally ripped the wires off myself and got down on all fours where I wa sjust about coping with the pain. I was too scared to let him go though, as I thought it might take him another few hours to reappear so I had an epidural. It was a blessed relief at that stage, but did result in a second stage of nearly two hours being on my back, and dd never did turn, coming out face up.
With ds I was determined to try for a natural birth and happily it was possible I was 1 week overdue but my waters broke and he was born in three and a half hours, and despite being back to back he turned before he was born, after only 8 minutes of pushing (in reality it was only about 2 or 3 pushes with rests in between). Over the two experiences, I would pick the second any day, but I don't know how much of the good bits was because he was my second iyswim. I was grateful to be allowed to be active, I stood up the whole time which I am convinced helped him turn. The whole thing was just better managed as well- rather than multiple nameless midwives i had a lovely lady by my side (well, bum in reality ) the whole time and it didn't even occur to me to ask for an epidural. I had been convinced that the actual birth would hurt like hell as I hadn't felt it with dd but it didn't at all. And getting up and into the shower after a cuddle with ds was just bliss. With dd I was still immobile the next morning.
Having said all that though, I don't understand people who are very anti- epidural. If you need one, then go for it. But maybe try some different positions first. I found Ina May Gaskins books so helpful when preparing for ds's birth. They really made me believe I could do it, and even in hard labour I remembered what I had read and it really did make a difference. Good luck whatever you choose x

Lilymolly - why are you unable to walk for 24 hours after an epidural? Is that standard? TIA.

Had two epidurals. First was wonderful - couldn't reccomend it enough. Took the pain away & I felt calm & relaxed. Let it wear off for second stage so that I could feel to push. DS1 was born without any problems & I only had a small tear which didn't need stitching.

Second time round I wasn't worried about the birth at all because of positive experience with epidural. Had another epidural, but this time it didn't work at all & I felt every bit of pain - it was agony! No problems with actual birth though.

If I was to do it again I am not sure I would go for an epidural again. I realise I was very lucky to have straightforward births as have heard of loads of people having instrumental deliveries following an epidural. Didn't think this through too greatly when expecting the boys, but it would worry me now. I don't think I would be so sure of wanting an epidural but would keep my options open!

had epidural - still managed to push baby out (in fact gald I did as would have ended up having one anyway as had assisted third stage) - took my blood pressure down and helped me through -esp as had ventouse/stitches

would have anotehr if have another (iyswim)

interesting set of replies. I only ask because I have an embarrasingly low pain threshold to the point that my old dentist used to spray my gums with lidocaine before cleaning my teeth because I used to flinch so much

are mobile epidurals any better, as apparently you can give birth upright with those?

My birth plan has only a few words so far.
Pain relief required in all forms!!!

Moonlight Mckenzie, did you have a doula for your 2nd? I think you live near me and I'd be interested in any recommendations...

ds1 epidural after 2 exhausting days of contractions getting me to 3cm . Blessed relief, was 10cm within the hour, then it all stalled and there followed a near-classic cascade of intervention - ARM, syntocin, episiotomy, ventouse. I did push, but had to be 'coached' to do so by the MW - it was wonderful to lose the pain but frankly disorientating to lose the real feeling of 'working' the contractions gave me.

ds2 I took the bus to hospital with very manageable contractions, was 9cm on arrival and born within half an hour. No pain relief whatsoever, obviously. I did scream 'I WANT an epiDURal' a couple of times, but I would not have accepted one even if there had been time. He ended up as a ventouse too, but only because he went into considerable distress when nearly out (cord was round his neck twice) and there had been meconium in the waters, which again hadn't gone by themselves. The pain was bad, but always bearable - screaming and talking helped me through it - and the urge to push and the feeling of the head crowning are IMO well worth experiencing. 2nd degree tear that I didn't feel at all at the time, was stitched and healed brilliantly. (Epi healed fine too but was more uncomfortable initially).

I wouldn't have another epidural if I could help it.

I went into my first labour knowing that I would need an epidural.

I knew that I would have one as soon as I arrived at the hospital.

I ended up arriving on delivery suite at 9-10cm dilated and no time for anything other than gas and air. I coped. I felt great that i had done it and it empowered me for my next birth.

I would say that it is labour which is painful....more so than birth. If you are managing well without an epidural through labour don't be foled into having one for the birth.

See how you feel on the day...don't commit yourself (even mentally) now.

The other thing to remember is that if you don't have an epidural you can shorten your labour by standing, rocking etc...so when you here things like 24hr labour...don't expect the pain to last the full time...if you chose not to have an epidural you will not be in pain for as long as you think (usually)...and you can always change your mind...

I was induced both times with oxytocin drip. I had epidural both times. Could feel enough tp push both times, had "mobile" epidural second time and actual birth was more painful than 1st time - no intervention needed either time. Absolutely no problems after - was up and about in a couple of hours. DC3 now on way - am not even going to pretend this time...will demand epidural at earliest opportunity!

I had no pain relief with ds1 and despite a natural and swift birth - I felt traumatized and horrified by the awfulness of the pain.I cannot remeber any of the birth other thsan the pain and I felt completely out of control.
With my twins I got to 9cm and had one (due to an inept midwife they didn't acknowledge I was in labour). I was so advanced he gave me a some combination of stuff that worked immediatly (spinal block maybe) --pure bliss - I pushed my beautiful babies out and I felt it all (including the placentas) but I felt no pain. It was like a miracle and I could walk to the loo about 30 minutes later. I think I had a very good anaes as I have heard horror stories.

Littlelamb - they didn't tell you DD was back to back!! I know nothing but I do know that B2B is an awkward and difficult position. Do you think they knew and didn't tell you, or did they not know?

Either way I am already suspicious of hospital staff who are just on the right side of legally competent with this sort of thing, never mind if it causes the woman extra pain or distress. I really hope I don't show it when my time comes to give birth, I know most MW are lovely however I have a mental pic of a bossy do-goodery MW who's "seen it all before" (and if under her care I tear like a piece of paper and can't sit down for 6 m afterwards, well then, never mind - baby came out in the end didn't s/he?

Ishoos, moi?!?!

ds1 - had epidural. erm should i say half of one as it just went down my left leg

No way would i have repeated the experience. DS2 and DD were fantastically quick labours and easy births [ds2 too quick, but that's another thread entirely]

The Epidural slowed everything down ridiculously for me and ended up with assisted delivery (ventouse) - I honestly believe I'd have only been in labour another hour or two if I hadn't had the epidural. My reason mainly for having it was that I had placenta praevia and it was only 5mm out of the way, so there was quite a possibility of CS and i didn't want a crash / GA one. Thus the lesser evil...

liznay, I felt exactly the same as you when I was pregnant with ds1. why go through the pain when you can have drugs?

so, when the time came I had gas and air. did nothing, so had pethidine. when that wore off I was in agony and demanded an epidural.

I was then strapped up to monitors and left on a bed to labour. which is pretty hard, when you can't feel your contractions.
the midwife had to tell me when tyo push, and kept telling me off for not doing it right. well, seeing as I couldn't feel anything that was hardly surprising.
I pushed for 2 hours, and ds1 was eventually born by ventouse.

the issues I have now, with hindsight are: he was in a funny position and may well have been able to turn had I been mobile and upright.
you DO need to push, and it is much more difficult if you cannot feel a bloody thing.
ds1 was very sleepy, and woudln't feed when born. I found out later that the epidural may have figured in this, and also the ventouse (which I may well not have needed had I not had an epidural). our start to breastfeeding was severely comprimised and I ended up formula feeding as he refused the breast completely.

do I know it would have been different had I not had the epidural? no, I don't. But I suspect it may have been, and there was no way in hell I was risking it for a second time.

When I had ds2 I opted for a home birht. there would be no pethidine and no epidurals to tempt me this time. My midwife expressed concern at my ability to endure the pain, I chose to just forget about it and deal with it at the tiem.

I managed to successfully deliver a 9lb 5oz baby boy, back to back, at home with no pain relief. it was absolutely fine.

and I can honestly say, hand on heart that ds2's birth was SO much nicer than my first. I couldn't have asked for a better experience

I had an epidural for my first, and i would never have one again!! i felt i was talked into it to early on (im sure the MW just wanted a quiet night ) and that it made my labour longer. Being laid on your back for all them hours just aint right in my opinion. Prior to epidural i was 6cm...it took a further 14 hours before i reached 10cm, DD was also in a good position prior to epidural and was back to back within a couple of hours of my having it. I finished up with 3 failed ventose attempts a full episiotomy and finally a rather nasty forceps delivery and if all this wasnt bad enough DD was so shocked by her delivery that she spent her first 7 days on NICU .

DD2 Totally differant, she was delivered at home (unplanned) after a 1.5 hour labour with the assistance of 2 wonder full paramedics .

These birth programmes unfortunatley arnt always as straight forwards as they seem, i felt competely out of control for my first labour (not enough to be put of doing it again though ).

Yes labour is painfull, but its the only pain i know that gives you such a big reward at the end of it!!.

Try and keep an open mind, you will more than likely cope alot better than your give yourself credit for.

Well, for me (and this is perception) not being able to have 24/7 access to my DH, which I could have in a mlu. I have heard many stories of DH's being sent away at 2cm when the woman is in pain, but not yet 'allowed' an epidural, and being sent away post birth leaving a faint, exhausted woman to try to shower/dress/change the baby on her own in an understaffed ward.

Also, in a mlu you aremuch less likely to be treated like on a conveyor belt and avoid the anxiety of having progress timed, which actually has the effect of slowing things down, and increasing the chances of intervention etc.

There are also increased chances of an instrumental delivery, risk of internal damage due to baby coming out not in optimal position if on back, and an increased risk of emergency c/section.

Finally, and this is probably the most important to me, - FOR ME an epidural would put my body into the hands of the hcps with a potentially different agenda to mine, and almost certainly deprive me of control.