mum's who've had epidurals - would you have another one?????

[liznay]

I'm having my first baby in 12 weeks or so and having watched around 100 births now on Discovery H&H i'm convinced that I'm going to have an epidural.

Why is every (wo)man and his dog trying to talk me out of it though? I don't understand why someone would want to be in that much pain when you can choose not to?
I know there are risks attached to having an epidural but some people have said I won't be able to push the baby out.
I was under the illusion that women have given birth whilst in a coma, so why wouldn't the contractions ease the baby down the birth canal?

If you've had an epidural or if you had both a natural birth and an epidural to compare the two - would you have another one?

However, if there were to be any indication that a section might have to happen, I would have the epidural to avoid the GA>

I had an epidural, t'was wonderful. And I was dead set against it (natural birth etc) until I was induced and the contractions began. I did have a small ache in my spine where it went in for a few months after but nothing bad. Another thing was not being able to get up and move around for a while...or have a bath/shower afterwards. But the relief when I got it...

However this time round I do intend to have a doula for more support (she may look less terrified than dh...therefore of more use) and try the natural birth route again. But would certainly not say no to a second epidural.

I also highly recommend you get high on g&a first...

I've had an epidural and no drugs.

Epidural is great. I was walking a few hours after the birth.

Definitely would have again...

MrsTittleMouse I'm sorry, I've not seen your birth story, but I am sorry that it wasn't as straightforward as you may have hoped. However, from the limited information I have on this thread it sounds like the experience was 'better' ?? I hope so anyway, - even difficult births can be better or worse depending on the attitude and support of the people present! ??

And, - a big congratulations on the birth and on you getting through it despite it being difficult! I'm sure you did fabulously!

Moonlight - agree on principle re: attitude, but for some, an epidural is a good thing. I had low amniotic fluid (and a raging kidney problem) so was induced. My labors tend to be hyper quick and kidney about to explode, it was the right thing.

Oh, and congratulations on baby girl! Am so pleased it went the way you wanted, and by all accounts was a good experience. You deserved it (as we all do...)

Haven't read all the thread, so I'm probably repeating a lot of what has been said. Had an epidural for first child. Was great (slept through labour and woken up when 10 cm dilated!). But couldn't push and couldn't walk. Needed a ventouse delivery but everything fine.

But despite this begged and begged for an epidural for DD6 and DS3. When the time came, couldn't have one as it was all happening too quickly, so stuck to gas and air.

It was painful but it was manageable and I was up and about much more quickly.

I had an epidural and it was fantastic! I walked to the bathroom an hour after labour and, tho DS was a forceps birth, this was due to him being back-to-back and was stuck. I would definitely have one again! I would never have pethidine again as my son slept for 24 hours after the birth and didn't eat anything. I'm sure it's one of the main reasons I wasn't able to BF properly. TENS was good tho....

What cracks me up is those mum's who look at me like I've failed or I'm mad or something, when I say I had one. They say 'oh, I did it naturally'. I think if anyone is in agony and is miserable and hasn't slept for 48 hours and this person in a white coat comes and says 'I can take this all away' they're mad to say no!

Women who put other women down because of their pain relief choices are just being alpha female .

I agree. There's so much snobbery when it comes to it. When people talk about their epidural, it's with an apology ('I ended up having to have an epidural in the end'.... shrugs shoulders, looks down at the floor)...

I felt in control and vaguely human and I was totally 'with it' when he came into the world.

Hooray for epidurals!

P.S. My sister had one and it only half worked (she still had pain down one side - turns out her DD was almost ready to pop out so it'd been given too late). Even she said she'd have one again as it still halved the pain!

Thanks ilovemydog. I think in someways people who have had a good natural birth after a traumatic one can appear more 'dogmatic'.

I know I have to be careful of appearing that way, - rather like ex-smokers are the worst when it comes to anti-smoking. They've been on journey and reaped the benefits and therefore think everyone else should at least try!

In reality, some women just don't want the benefits, and some aren't even interested in what those benefits may be.

chloe It is possible that your baby may have been able to move better and not get stuck at all had you not had an epidural.

ilovemydog Sorry I forgot to add that SOME people are just not interested in the 'benefits' of an epidural too!

mine were both great.

Hi Starlight.
My birth story is spread across several other threads, I have been a serial highjacker recently. I don't know why I didn't do a proper annoucement, but I suppose it's a bit late now. I had a lot of problems with the second stage (again) and DD2 didn't want to descend (again). But a superhuman effort and supported squat with purple pushing (completely against my birth plan ) finally got her past what my DH charmingly calls the U-bend, and I avoided transfer. The MW fudged the time that I entered second stage too, to give me more time - thank goodness as I really needed it. And thank you lovely MW.

Anyway, back to the point of the thread. I think that I'm the opposite of the ex-smoker type. I tried for natural birth twice, and put in the same effort both times. Once I needed medical intervention (including an epidural), and once I got her out naturally. And I was the same person both times, so I know how much is down to pure luck.

MoonlightMcKenzie,

As far as the doctor who delivered him was concerned, and the two midwives we had with us, it wasn't the epidural, but the fact he was the wrong way round! His head circumference was massive. He'd been back-to-back for the last 2 weeks of my pregnancy and the only reason the midwives weren't concerned as they thought I had ages to go (he came 3 weeks early).

I was so exhausted by the agony I'd been in (as he was back-to-back) without an epidural that I was able to conserve some energy to push. Not having an epidural for the last 6 hours would have wiped me out and I probably would have had the forceps anyway.

Plus, he had a bad reaction to the pethidine and was a dopey little thing... so dopey he slept for 24 hours without waking (even for a first feed). I'm sure that didn't help with his ability to move!

Chloe Your birth story sounds very similar to my first. Baby was back to back, had big head, had pethidine etc.

I didn't have an epidural and was able to move into positions that increased the chances of him moving and he DID move during labour and came out the right way (contractions in a good position can help to turn the baby).

BUT, the barbaric hospital that I gave birth in let me scream for an epidural for 6 hours (full, short-staffed labour ward) until it was just too late to have one. As you predicted for yourself, I had NO energy left to push the baby out and after 3 hours on my back had an assisted delivery. Baby also arrived sleepy and I had problems feeding initially.

However, I have since learned and proven to myself (through birth no.2) that I don't need energy to push if I am in a good position, and that pethidine does feck all for the pain.

I planned very carefully to enable myself NOT TO WANT an epidural the second time given that begging for one didn't get me one the first time, and would urge other people to do the same.

I THOUGHT I was well informed the first time, having attended NCT, read etc. but compared to what I know now I knew feck all. I have ishoos about this and truly believe that many many women go into labour not knowing half of what they think they know and even refusal of medical intervention on half-knowledge can have potentially devistating affects.

So, I propose properly staffed maternity units, decent and informative antenatal care, one midwife to one woman and a lot of patience!

MrsTittleMouse Your MW sounds great. I'm really pleased.

I know what you mean about the difference between the births. The first time I was in so much pain, begging for an epidural at 2cm, the second time I just had a bit af a suck on gas and air when pushing. The mw told me afterward the second time that I must have a really high pain threshold

Can your pain threshold change within a year and a half then?

It's made me understand that some people most definately experience more pain than others, that it can differ for the same woman between labours and that no-one can or should judge a woman for requesting any type of pain relief they feel they need. THEY are the ONLY person capable of knowing what they need.

moonlight, I've read that the closer the labours are together, the better they are.

In the Netherlands (where I am) you're encouraged to have home birth and 30% do, and the midwife comes to check on you but only stays with you after 7 cm onwards... Not really sure about that! (I'm 17 weeks preg). It is all very midwife led but have heard a lot of horror stories so think it depends on the midwife. There are certainly no problems with under resourcing or clean hospitals. I had DS in Belgium, which was overly medicalised (all women tested for strep b and then hooked up to antibiotic drip) and epidural on demand but fantastic care afterwards, they provided everything from shower gel through to sanitary pads and baby clothes! And 5 days in the hospital being looked after.. That bit was great at least! In Netherlands you get a woman coming in to help you for 1-2 weeks after the birth, which is also great...

I would do everything I could to avoid another epidural. Had one as things were going a bit wonky and while the pain stopped etc so did my labour - no further dialation in 14 hours and ended up with a c-section :0(

That was just my experience of course and I know friends who think it was the best choice they ever made.

Kat x

www.mamatobegoodies.co.uk

I had an epidural last year when i had my little girl and i'd definately have one again.Good luck with the birth

Really Gemzooks That's interesting. Where did you read it? What aspects are 'better'? The contractions? crowning? or memory and ensuring things go your way?

moonlight, can't remember where I read it, but basically the speed of labour is the factor; much quicker if you've had a recent labour. I was frantically googling this as hoping I won't have another 36 hour jobbie...

Hmm, First was 17 hours from 1st contraction, but no idea about second as was having strong bh for days that just turned into labour. Notes say 6.5 hours, but actually no idea when active labour started as mw didn't think i was in active labour until she could see the baby's head!

be open to the possibility that you won't need such a strong pain relief...

i managed a home birth with no interventions at all (except some arnica)...

-no episiotomy thanks to perineum massage..

• no gas/air, epidural or other because the midwife didn't have any!

-lots of silence, going within, deep breathing, and active birth movements that helped ease the contractions and helped me find my birthing rhythm...

having the option to be able to move throughout the birth, to dance, stretch, sit, crawel, and being totally in control of our own bodies and feelings, was so empowering i am looking forward to second birth in a couple of weeks!

xxx