Natural - v - Caesarean - a new thread

[JoolsToo]

sorry to be bossy but can we carry on here?

I'm for natural when possible

Dinosaur: My experience with the midwives was very much one-on-one supportive experience. I had a few over the course of my labour but a couple of them were REALLY focused and caring, and POSITIVE.

One showed me how to pull myself off my butt with the handles on the bed in order to push better while the main midwife was out of the room panicking about finding forceps! One left a note on my bed when I was asleep afterwards to say my daughter was beautiful! I will be eternally grateful for the great care they provided.

The midwife showing-me-the-handles story sounds a bit odd now I've written it, but she was saying all the time "Come on, we can do this! You're nearly there!" like my own personal cheerleader. The main midwife was worrying about the plummeting heartbeats and this one (she was v. young) was trying to get me to push my daughter down so no violent intervention was needed! It felt very conspiritorial and good humoured.

I am a big fan of the NHS and the work that midwives do.

I think, for me, it was the fact it was mentioned even before I was induced (should say I had been in and out of the hospital every other day - including a Sunday - to be monitored....) - there was obviously things in the notes they weren't telling me, as they kept saying it was 'okay'. I suppose what they meant was it was okay at the moment and they knew I was being induced on the Tues anyway...
It was pretty obvious they weren't happy as I had two midwives and a register with me all the time (and the consultant popped in as well - and the neo natal nurses would be on hand I was told..) I'm not disputing my care at all - they were great, I just feel I wasn't told the whole story - the 'whys' if you like.
In the end it was a mad dash to theatre (which was rammed to the gills with medical staff so dp tells me - I closed my eyes at this point...), but still managed to get him out without a C' as I did the last cm in the trolley dash......

I really do think that is a myth - after all a c-section offers no cosmetic advantages - you do have a scar (but then I had one already from ovarian cyst surgery many years ago, so that wasn't an issue for me!) and you don't get a free tummy tuck! Of the people I have known who have had a maternal choice c-section (two including me!) cosmetic considerations simply didn't figure, because I don't think there are any, nor did worries about a future sex life. I certainly didn't fancy a third or fourth degree tear or stitches in me bits, but I don't actually think that's unreasonable.

I felt like the midwife on duty the night I went in actually hated me - she was so callous and unkind. The aftercare was lovely, and so were all the staff who did the section, but she was horrible to me.

I requested an elective CS. I had absolutely no desire to labour for hours and end up with my fanny looking like someone had taken a cheese grater to it. I knew I wouldn't be able to cope with it and that any post-trauma feelings may interfere with my ability to BF or bond with DS.

I was right - it was absolutely the right choice for me.

I will not tolerate anyone telling me that my birth choice was wrong, or that I am somehow less of a mother.

I was worried about bonding, esp as during my nightmare night I started to think really negative thoughts about my baby, and even started to seriously berate myself for being so stupid as to get pregnant and ruining my life, and how this baby was just a source of pain etc. Luckily all those feeling evaporated when the pain stopped and I saw my beautiful girl for the first time and fell in love with her.

Caesarians of course.
So obviously what nature intended.

sorry I am feeing mischevious tonight

Oh good I missed another c-section vs vaginal discussion

If you met me and my 2 children on the streets you'd never know how I chose to give birth, and hopefully you'd never care

Can't see why its so important to some people to prove their point unless its just 'I did hence it must be the right way'

Being a mum is difficult enough without being made to feel like you have to justify your birthing method IMHO

Not so much mischievous as just horrible really

Would you go on a formula v breast milk thread and say the same?

By that token then nature presumably intended for lots of us to die in childbirth. 150 years ago quite a few of us on this thread wouldn't have made it. So sod nature frankly.

Good point Twiglett. Thanks.

I've not read posts here but have to say I dont get it. What difference does it make how baby came out? If I had been given the choice I'd have gone for a section.

I think V Beckham is sneered at for being up her arse and giving her kids pretentious names not for having a c-section.

How did the facts of her births become public knowledge? It is completely private between her , her husband and the medical staff, surely?.
Did she tell the world or did someone from one of the hospitals leak the facts?

if you go onto one of the threads about her new baby you will find 'too posh to push' comments.

Sincere apologies beansprout I did not mean to offend you.
I was having a wee joke, possibly in poor taste and just proves the rule never post after a bad week and two glasses of wine in quick succession.
SHake?

Yes, she is criticised on here for being "too posh to push".

Bless you Jasper. Shake

please tell me noone actually thought I was making a serious point about all c-sections??

frankly, I don't see why women are made to believe that how they give birth is so important when there are more serious things to consider, like establishing BF. Why is there so little emphasis on caring for your baby in ante-natal classes? There is soooooo much evidence-based studies these days on infant development but none of it seems to filter through to new mums.

Your brand new baby doesn't give a stuff how he came into the world. All he wants is grub, a dry bum and not be left to cry for hours on end. And if that sounds easy.........

Someone take that bottle of wine off that plump lady in Scotland .Calls herself Jasper. Yes, The one whose kids are running riot
She is talking complete drivel and needs restrained

Don't worry Jasper, enjoy your wine - It's Friday .

jasper, v jealous of the wine

I should really not take part in any birth discusions because I had the unbelievable priviledge of having my three deliverd by mears. (form a queue for autographs)
Not just the births but hours of antenatal chat and bf support.
I have NO IDEA of the realities of giving birth in the NHS under "normal" levels of care/non care so I am off to crawl under a stone and drink more wine.

Can we have a sozzled emoticon?

jasper.

Mears as your midwife - you jammy devil .