Positive c section recovery stories

[bk1981]

I'm one week post emergency section and finding the whole thing really hard to come to terms with.
The idea that my baby was so distressed inside me that he needed to be pulled out so urgently is terrifying but I'm also so upset that I needed the surgery. I feel almost violated I think, at the thought of them rummaging around and leaving me with a big scar. I don't know if this is a normal feeling?
My first birth was forceps so this was supposed to be my 'easier' second time mum birth. The forceps recovery was a walk in the park compared to this!
The physical recovery is really challenging when I have a toddler to look after and I hate feeling like I can't do basic things! I've basically spent the last two years being pregnant or miscarrying so this was supposed to be our lovely summer as a family of four at last. Instead I'm hobbling around at home while my husband tries to entertain our toddler by himself. I can't drive or put the younger one in the carrier so I'm basically housebound if I have them both by myself.
Please send your positive section recovery stories this way. In particular, when could you drive, baby-wear and go for short walks?

After a failed induction, I ended up having an emergency c section. My recovery was v straight forward and no issues 6 months later. I waited the 6 weeks to drive for insurance purposes but prob could have driven sooner.

Please be kind to yourself it's only been a week. I am sorry you feel upset about the surgery. I had 2 emergency and one elective. When I had my c sections they kept you in hospital for a week so you had a week to rest after. You don't have to go out if you don't feel like it and it's good that your DH is at home to look after your toddler. It does get easier. You can't drive for 6 weeks anyway. When you feel up to it try to do just short walks with or without baby to help get your mobility back.

It's been a year from my emergency C-section and you can barely see the scar.

For me recovery was better than from the birth of DD1 when I lost a lot of blood.

Just make sure you have enough rest. I was lucky DH was home for 6 weeks. I spend a lot of time in bed or on the sofa cuddling the baby. I was baby wearing by week 3 with one of those stretchy wraps because they don't put much pressure on your stomach. I was driving again by 5 weeks.

Why can’t you put the baby in a carrier? Or in a double buggy if your toddler isn’t walking longer distances? I got one that went flat for newborn on one side.
Anyway I’ve had two sections. It was medically recommended and my main criteria was if it means a healthy baby I don’t care how he comes out! And I had to ignore my DH’s ex wife saying ‘so not a real birth then’!!
Baby was very big and first one recovery was fine I was out and about a couple days later and joined local post natal group when he was three weeks old. He was born three weeks early but over 10lbs so looked bigger than the others!
Second more tricky needed a drain and baby was in NICU. But still got up and about and though I had an extra couple days in hospital once out it was fine. I am normally a home body but I was bored out of my mind and went for daily walks. Had a three mile route, stopping half way at a coffee shop and that kept me sane. Of course once the older one developed a mind of his own that got harder! But I had him in daycare a couple days a week which worked well - he was an energiser bunny and I got to have one to one with baby. I didn’t drive for the full six weeks.
Give yourself time and accept any offers of help and if need be pull in some favours! Every recovery is different, but do try and go for walks which will help too.

You will feel very differently next week! The first week is the hardest. Lots of rest and recuperation.

I did my first walk at around 5 days post section - literally just around my house. Then built it up day by day. By 3 weeks I was doing 5k walks again with my dog (albeit a bit slower than normal!).

I am now 20 months PP, I have no 'c section shelf', my scar is really thin and hidden away, my body feels completely normal.

The thing is, you've had an emergency section, so things will be rougher, harder to recover from etc.

In that way I'm not sure you'd really benefit from good c section recovery stories. I mean, tbh I was happily wandering round the shops on day 3 with no pain and was baby wearing by that point. But hearing how good recovery from a planned section can be isn't going to help.

Take it one day at a time, follow your body, and you'll get there. Often recovery from these things can feel tricky and then suddenly get better.

ps: re driving, most insurers are fine once you feel ready, so the 6w ban is a myth. I wasn't a driver when I had my sections, but based on my mobility I'd have returned after a week or two. Most of my friends returned to driving by 2-3 weeks.

You’ll feel a lot different this time next week.
Take this time to rest. Keep on top of painkillers.
scar will be barely noticeable.

I was walking out of the house from 5 days, there was an in person clinic appointment on day 5 and that was really the first day out. It was a struggle but after that it was fine. The next day we went for a walk to get coffee and breakfast, the following day baby was register so drove to the town hall because the tube would have involved a bit too much walking, but we did walk to the pub after.
I would pop a pad under the zipper of if I wanted to wear jeans and just made sure I took paracetamol and ibuprofen on a cycle for probably 3 full weeks.
From this point you will probably feel noticeably better every day. You should be doing little walks outside each day whether you want to or not because it will help recovery.

Emergency is very hard after you've been in labour for hours and recovery is harder. I had planned c sections due to a pelvic/hip issue but the 2nd was officially emergency as I had gone into labour. But nothing like full on contractions.

Firstly, don't worry about your baby - coming out is pretty tough whichever way it happens. It doesn't help I suppose that they use the term that the baby is 'in distress' around emergency sections, but I think in that context it just means that they can't come out the usual way, not that they're somehow scared or upset. Also remind yourself how lucky you are that a safe c section is available to you because the alternative is much worse.

Congrats on your baby, wishing you a speedy recovery. It is generally not as long as they say honestly you are probably recovering as much from the labour as the actual section so be kind to yourself.

NB, my scar was barely visible within a year or two, I pretty much forgot it was there.

for you, OP - you’ve had a traumatic experience and it’s very early days so all fresh in your mind (and body) but hopefully things will start to get easier soon. Try not to expect too much from yourself for a while - if it were any other open abdominal surgery nobody would expect you to be rushing around, let alone taking care of a toddler and newborn.

Your in the early days right now, so just go easy on yourself. You've got all the hormones flushing their way round your body AND you've had major abdominal surgery AND you've got 2 children to look after. It's bloody hard.

I think your feelings about the scar are normal. I couldn't look at mine for about a week after because I was so scared of what it would look like, despite nurses, midwives, my DH and my DM all saying it looked fine (and it was fine)! I'm 4 years on and I do have a shelf and a slight scar, but I love it. It reminds me of my beautiful boy and how fierce us women are to be able to get through the trauma and pain of childbirth, whatever form that takes (and sometimes even do it again!).

My advice would be, don't push yourself too hard. Keep on top of your painkillers and your peppermint tea. Sit with your baby, let your DH do the rest!
After my section, I think I first went out with DS2 after 10days. That was literally to a coffee shop, because I wanted coffee and a cake. DH drove. DS1 was at pre school. I think I did small walks after 2 weeks, going a little bit further each day. Didn't drive for 6 weeks.
Also, if you eldest is at nursery/preschool, do send them as normal. Don't feel guilty about doing so either, you get bonding time with your newborn and they get to smash around, have fun and make a mess elsewhere! We had our eldest at home the day we came back from hospital and the day after and then he was sent to preschool as normal.

I think you need to focus on the positives: my first was an emergency section many years ago. Each time I looked at her properly in those first few weeks I’d well up (probably not helped by hormones and her being my PFB) because she was so close to not making it. The cord was wrapped around her neck. Modern medicine saved her life. To this day I gasp when I think too deeply about how our lives would have been different if I hadn’t had that section. Who cares about being rummaged inside of? There’s little dignity in a hospitalized birth - frankly there’s little dignity in childbirth under any circumstances, outside of the immense pride and dignity of having created that human. It doesn’t matter, none of it mattered then or now. I was lucky to have made it through and so was she. Be positive. It’s far healthier for you.

I had two elective c sections. I honestly sailed through them both. I had DD on a Friday and got home on Monday. On Tuesday morning I lifted my quite heavy 15 month old DS out of his cot and carried him downstairs, no problem. I really hope that you bounce back and enjoy your children.

I’ve had two C sections, but they were both planned and I think recovery is a lot easier compared to an EMCS. Are you taking pain relief? If you’re not, absolutely do. It will allow you to mobilise comfortably, which will really speed up your recovery. I was on codydramol plus ibuprofen for a whole week, and then paracetamol and ibuprofen to the maximum dose allowed for a good few weeks.

Do make sure you keep your scar clean and dry to prevent infection. Use water only, in the shower (not bath) and dry it thoroughly using something clean and absorbent. I used an unused maternity pad, which worked really well. I’d then lie on the bed for a few minutes to air the scar after every shower.

The other thing I’d say is that C section recovery is linear in my experience. It gets better and better every day that goes on. You’re probably way past the worst and will feel a bit more recovered every day from now.
My forceps experience in the first birth was particularly unpleasant (I also had a 3b tear, lost 2.9l of blood, my bladder stopped working and my pelvic floor muscles were severely affected). But the worst part was the recovery, which was one step forward three steps back. As soon as something improved, something else got worse: unable to sit down, infected stitches, incontinence, muscle spasms, you name it. It took months. The C sections I had afterwards were nothing like that.
Wishing you the very best and a smooth recovery from here!

Thank you for the kind words that have been said from those that understand why I might be feeling traumatised. The sound of my son's heartbeat slowing and slowing after every contraction and hearing the consultant say 'category one' will stay with me forever. I think I have a lot of guilt as I have now 'failed' to deliver both of my children myself. The theatre that he was born in was also the same one that I attended after my 2nd trimester loss a year ago which probably doesn't help! After three miscarriages I am very painfully aware that a healthy baby is the most important thing.

I don't know why the thought of them cutting into me is bothering me so much. Maybe it's vain but I really can't bare it.

Right now, my stomach core just feels way too sore for the additional strain of a baby carrier and I don't want to risk doing it too early and having the recovery take even longer. We can't afford to just buy a double pram and our plan had always been to baby-wear for the first few months while my oldest is in the pram. She can walk when in the right frame of mind but if she did kick off for whatever reason I'd need to be able to lift her and buckle her safely into the pram as there are busy roads where we live.

It's good to hear how quickly some of you have recovered and it gives me hope that I'll be able to snatch a little bit of family summer time before it's gone.

First of all, mind yourself and don't be comparing yourself to others. Everyone is different and you need to deal with what you have going on. I felt like I was hit by a ton of bricks after my section, particularly the first week. Other Mums were up and about going for walks - I hadn't left the house, barely left th sofa. It was probably about two weeks before I went for a walk. Once I started feeling better I recovered quickly, but it did take a while at the start.

For context my second was a vbac with second degree tear and a bruised coxyxx and recovery was so much easier, I was the Mum running around the house with the eldest once home from hospital. So for whatever reason I found the C-section very hard.

So take your time and don't worry about what you can't do, just do what you can, get help, eat convenience, turn on the telly for the toddler, and really you'll be very quickly back on your feet.

One other thing is to give yourself grace with how you feel. My son had to be delivered by c section to save his life and I was still devastated, it doesn't make sense but it was how I felt. Now being down the road of two different birth experiences I know it makes no difference, but at the time it feels so important. Those feelings are real and it's fine to have them. You will be spending the next ten years running around after these kids, a week or two for you to rest won't make any difference.

I actually agree that the baby carrier could set you back so early. Best allow your core muscles to recover first I think! Incidentally, I was able to use the baby carrier much sooner post C section than after the vaginal birth. My pelvic muscles were in such a state after that one, it was a good 6 months before I could di it without feeling like my insides were falling out. The pelvic physio also said it wasn’t a good idea.

Also, please please please don’t feel like you’ve failed! We’re so often told our bodies “are made to give birth” and “know exactly what to do”, when they aren’t and don’t. Human birth changed when we started walking upright and our heads grew in size to accommodate our bigger brains. Biologically, it’s a dangerous business. For some it works out without a hitch, but very often it doesn’t and we are very lucky to have modern medicine to step in at that point. Before that, maternal and baby mortality were very high, as they remain in areas where medical help isn’t at hand. It makes me so angry when women are made to feel guilty as a result of what is, essentially, biological fact. NCT, hypnobirthing and the like have a lot to answer for in that respect.

Finally, you’re only a week in and understandably traumatised after the miscarriages (I’m so sorry!), the category 1 section and so on. Time will heal, physically and mentally, but don’t hesitate to talk to your GP about trauma counselling if it doesn’t get better. Big hugs 💐.

PS re the buggy, I know it’s not the same as strapping her in, but would a buggy board help with your toddler?
edited for typos

Hi

Firstly im sorry that your experiences havent felt positive for you. Please be kind to yourself, you are recovering from the only major surgery where you are expected to get up and care for a helpless baby within the first hour or so and where sleep deprivation and raging hormones are considered part and parcle of it all. Not forgetting that pain relief isnt always great afterwards either.

Im 6m post second c section. 1st was emergency and 2nd elective (although not really a choice as I had placenta previa).
I saw you said about planning to babywear and the cost of a double buggy. After my second I invested in a buggy board for my first and its been amazing. You can also get fabric seat type things that sit on the back of a pram. Ive seen a couple of these being sold on vinted as recent as yesterday relatively cheap (£10 -15).

As far as my experiences i struggled with the feeling I couldnt do much for my first in the weeks after however once I could drive again and not feel so dependent on others this feeling improved.

Scarwise can hardly see mine now. From my first I know that adter a year its like a tiny scratch (maybe 4 -5cm long).

You can also ask for a birth debrief if ever you wanted that where the team go through every step and action they took and why. Wasn't for me personally but had a friend who found this helpful in emotional healing for them.

Best of luck.

Thank you. I'll look into a buggy board although it's more having somewhere safe to strap her in if she's having a tantrum etc that I need.

I've been thinking about a debrief as I would like to know how much danger he was in so I can process and move on. I would also like to know if they think my pelvis is just not birth shaped after having two babies get stuck in exactly the same position! We are very much done having children now but I would like to know.

Thank you for your kind words.

I've had two emcs and particularly after the first which was also a cat 1 crash CS where dd's heart stopped and I haemorrhaged, I felt utterly traumatised. A debrief really helped. Nowadays, I just see them as the stories of their births, no more and no less.

I was lucky with recovery. I didn't need pain relief and was back to normal very quickly, home the following day and mostly okay to get on with things. When dc2 was 4 days old, I took DD to school for the first time which involved a baby carrier, a bus and a mile walking. I know through talking to people on here for two decades however, that everybody has their own experiences and you can only listen you your body. Stay active, move around as you are able and take pain relief regularly. You will get there. And get that debrief booked in.

Well done. You've done brilliantly. This is only a brief sneeze of time in your parenting journey.

I've just seen your last post. Please bear in mind that it's likely that they won't be able to give 100% answers. Mine both got stuck. One wedged with their head sideways in deep transverse arrest and one not even able to progress a mm into the birth canal. They could confirm that I was likely unable to give birth naturally but there was no way to know for sure.

I think my recovery from (unplanned but not emergency) c section was fine but I wasn’t able to baby wear for about 6 weeks. I had been very fit beforehand but felt like I had no core muscles at all and it was uncomfortable. You might find it much easier sooner of course! I didn’t understand how other people were baby wearing so soon and felt a bit frustrated but we are all different so if this is you try not to worry. 6 weeks in grand scheme of things isn’t so long. Though I appreciate having a toddler too must be a challenge! Good luck!

I also had emergency c section and felt very similar to what you describe in week 1. However by day 15 I was swimming for 20mins and by day 18 I was driving! Just rest as hard as you can for as long as you can and you might be surprised how quickly things suddenly change!

I found my EMCS easier to recover from than my VBAC with forceps. The important thing is to try and stay mobile as it stops you from stiffening up. The no driving for six weeks is a complete myth unless you have some sort of complication. I was driving 10 days after my section. Check with your insurance company what their policy is. I’ve had a lot of abdominal surgeries and every time they have said that as long as my medical provider is happy for me to drive then they are happy. There has only been one time that my GP has said I needed to wait at least four weeks before driving.