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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Haven't even got to childbirth yet, days away, and already the labour ward have let me down.. I'm getting really upset about it.,

59 replies

mumblesmummy · 11/05/2008 13:21

Had a HORRIBLE experience today. Waters sort of gushed in the night, some clear, some pink, and some with streaks of blood in. I woke up DP and my mum (we were staying at mums). Mum rang the labour ward and they said to get some sleep and come down before 9.

We went down at about half 8 and have just returned home now. The labour ward was so packed that they had one baby, new mum and her visitors in the waiting room. The baby was even left unattended at one point. It was diabolical.

The midwives kept going on about how they were so rushed off their feet and there was a queue of people waiting for my room.

They did a heartbeat check, then swapped midwives, so I'd explained the situation twice. She then got me to explain it a further two times. She did a fetal heart monitor and baby was fine, but I was getting regular contractions. She asked if they hurt and I said they felt like bad period pain. I was going to be sick and felt very light headed, and she said 'oh you just look so miserable, honestly'. Funnily enough, I was bloody miserable. She then called my gush 'a show' despite the fact I had one with the consultant, then 2 whopping great plugs came out yesterday.

She did a speculum, didn't go anywhere near my cervix but claimed it was still closed and long. Despite the fact I was 2cms dilated the other day.

She then said I had an infection, and asked if that's what I'd seen the night before, I said no and explained AGAIN what had happened and she disregarded it and said my waters hadn't gone and it was just discharge or wee, and went off to see the doctor. We were left waiting ages yet again and then a doctor came in, made me tell the whole stroy AGAIN, and said he thought they'd keep me over night to monitor the baby but he'd see the registrar.

The other midwife came back and said that I would be sent home with amoxycillin for a water infection- despite the fact I've had it over and over again and it's never cleared the water infection. It's a lower dose than the one I took last week that didn't work... so what's the point?

She then told me to go and wait in a PACKED waiting room where there were no seats and seemed to find it hillarious and took the piss when I sat in someone else's seat by accident. She then said 'there are seats outside you know, go and wait out there'.

I'd really seen my arse with her by this point and told her I was not happy and she got all attitudey about it.

I had a big long cry with mum and DP because I was so frustrated and then the midwife came out and spoke to me and said I could stay in if I was in such a state. I said I'd let her know later today.

But I am NOT going back there. I'm not even going about waters. The first midwife told me my waters would have broken but not the bit round the baby's head and so I would be induced in the morning to prevent infection. The second said they hadn't broken and I just have an infected fanjo with green discharge which she called 'nasty yucky discharge' and showed me. Cheers luv.

So I'm not going if my waters fully break because there's no point. Everytime I've been to the labour ward for anything this pregnancy they've fobbed me off because they're 'busy'. So I'm going to leave it until my contractions are so bad I feel like I can't live any longer, and then I'll go.

If that doesn't happen before Thursday I'm getting induced (as arranged with consultant last week), so now I'm TERRIFIED about that because I don't want to be in that pathetic labour ward a second longer than I have to be.

My GP midwife had told me to stay in the hospital for longer than just the day because of DPs cousin dying after child birth last year as obviously we'd all be anxious, but I'm not, I'm getting out as soon possible.

The midwife I saw today who was so crappy even admitted that she hadn't done her job well enough if she'd left me in tears and she should have put my mind at rest.

So overall I'm worried about the state of the overcrowded labour ward, and I'm worried my baby will get an infection from me and that my waters have gushed with pink bits and blood and still no one will take me seriously.

Sorry for the VERY long rant, and well done if you managed to get through it all. How on earth can I just chill out and get a grip so that I'm not this wound up in labour? I know they'll mess it up, the always do there, and there's been HUNDREDS of stillbirths lately, in the paper all the time.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
addictedtoharibo · 11/05/2008 20:05

Mumblesmummy - daft question but are you living in Mumbles?

mumblesmummy · 11/05/2008 20:12

No, it was mumbles after the penguin on Happy Feet because the baby keeps dancing in my tummy. A few people have asked that though. I didn't know it was a place.

OP posts:
addictedtoharibo · 11/05/2008 20:28

Its a (lovely) area of swansea so was just going to offer you some more practical advice. Im sorry I cant in this situation - it really sounds awful.

xx

mumblesmummy · 12/05/2008 09:28

Update (some TMI at points): I feel SUCH a fool today. The midwife said yesterday if I suddenly thought there was something not right and I just didn't feel right, to go back. Well I woke in the middle of the night with a hideous headache, feeling REALLY sick, and could not for love nor money get the baby to move. Normally I only have to make the slightest movement or touch his foot and he's wriggling away and trying to kick his way out, but nothing at all. Both me and DP tried all the things that usually get him to move and he wouldn't at all.

I sat up and the goop stuff ran through a pad, through knickers and PJs and all over the towel on the bed. So I ran to the toilet and it carried on pouring. I rung labour ward and they said 'the baby has already been monitored today and it was fine. If you REALLY want to come up you can, but babies don't move at night anyway'. So I said 'I do want to come up.'

When she found the heart (which took a bit), I nearly burst into tears and she said 'look we've done this once today, what's the problem?' so i explained what had happened and she said 'I think you're just not getting enough sleep and it's making you like this', but she's sending me for a scan today to see if it's waters just to put my mind at rest. Then I've got to go back to the labour ward again with the results which I'm REALLY apprehensive about as I think they think I've completely lost the plot now, and they seem to be getting really impatient.

I'm so embarressed. Feel like I need to get away... from me!

OP posts:
BeauLocks · 12/05/2008 09:34

Why on eath should you feel embarrassed? The labour ward have treated you terribly imho and they should be hanging their heads in shame.

You have done nothing wrong and nothing to be embarrassed about and don't let them tell you otherwise.

I think they have let you down badly in the way they have treated you. Having a baby is a really anxious time for everyone and they clearly need to brush up on their professional skills. I'm sure that you just need some reassurance rather than their condescending attitude. Cows.

threestars · 12/05/2008 09:43

Hey, it doesn't matter what they think, or what you think they think. It matters how you feel. You need to have your mind put at rest so that you can rest your body in preparation for the birth.
It's good you were assertive.This is your baby, not their's, so you care the most and you're simply being a good mother. x.

LazyLinePainterJane · 12/05/2008 09:45

Which hospital is is mumbles? I should think that a lot of people would like to avoid it!

You have no reason to feel embarrassed, the staff at the hospital should be feeling nothing but. What awful treatment!

edam · 12/05/2008 09:48

I agree, why on earth should you feel embarrassed? The bloody midwives who were so unprofessional should be the ones feeling bad. I know they are rushed off their feet etc. etc. but that is no excuse for being unkind and frightening a woman who is about to go into labour.

Feel for you and hope you get someone decent when it does actually happen.

cosima · 12/05/2008 09:49

It is disgusting the state of maternity hospitals, BUT don't let your anger and annoyance stop you from going, Go and demand what you want. Don't put yourself in any risk. Good luck,

yurt1 · 12/05/2008 09:51

Bloody hell they sound dreadful. I've been in twice when the baby stopped moving (in a very understaffed unit) and they were excellent and kind and thoughtful.

Is there really no way you can swap hospitals? Can you ring your community (GP)) midwife and ask to talk to her asap. I think given your family history they should be taking extra care to reassure you.

mears · 12/05/2008 09:52

mumblesmummy - you were perfectly correct to contact the labour ward agagin and I vexed for you that you were not treated any better .

However, at least you are having a scan for reassurance. The amount you describe leaking sounds a lot and could be your waters mixed with gloop.

Sometimes the hindwaters (from the back of the baby) can leak and reseal itself.

It was right to be monitored when you did not feel any movement - babies do move at night as well.

I think you level of anxiety is increasing because you are getting close to delivery and the worries about what happened to your sister and DPs cousin. Be reassured that it is extremely rare for a woman to die in childbirth and you will be fine. Your sister had HELLP syndrome which you do not.

Try and focus on the positive side. Very soon your baby will be here and you will be a mummy

goingfor3 · 12/05/2008 09:52

Mubblesmummy, you have nothing to be embarrassed about! The midwfe should not have made you feel like you have. I feel so sad for you that the midwives on labour ward have such an attitude. I hope all goes well at the scan.

nappyaddict · 12/05/2008 10:07

any news on the broken waters front?

chunkychips · 12/05/2008 10:09

I'm really angry for you, you've been treated like a child and nobody seems to have explained anything to you in a way that will ease your concerns, just fobbed you off because they've seen it all before and they don't have the time or patience to explain it to you. Hurray for mears explaining all this stuff, why can't your midwives have done that? It must be really worrying to see all this fluid coming out because you're told that when that happens it means your waters have broken and you're in danger of infection. I hope you get sorted out soon and get some better treatment and that the delivery goes well for you. I wouldn't worry about mithering them either, it's your baby.

Rosylily · 12/05/2008 10:17

yeah mumblesmum, bother them as much as you feel you need to, don't be embarrassed. Tell them that you are very anxious and need to be reassured. That is part of their job, it is such a shame that you are not being reassured by the hospital.

Try to stay calm, it is nicer to be in labour at home and once you are ready to give birth you will only care about the task in hand. Relaxation really helps with labour.

Keep posting here on mumsnet because you'll get loads of support and reassurance here!

mears · 12/05/2008 21:12

How did the scan go?

pregnabrain · 12/05/2008 23:34

mm - sorry to hear you've had another bad experience at the hospital. sending big hugs to you.

don't feel intimidated into keeping quiet about things that are worrying you. just be firm with them to get the reassurance you need. they can be stroppy, but they can't not deal with you.

it's no surprise that you're feeling so shaken up after everything that's happened with your sister's situation. perhaps your GP could put you in touch with a community midwife or midwife at the hospital who could just spend some time with you talking you through everything calmly? It sounds like you really need a reassuring professional ear...so for you that you're not getting this at the hospital.

Hope the scan went well today.

StarlightMcKenzie · 12/05/2008 23:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mears · 13/05/2008 11:56

I wonder if there will be a birth announcement soon

pregnabrain · 13/05/2008 13:51

Was just wondering the same thing myself

nappyaddict · 15/05/2008 19:13

i wonder if on monday they discovered her waters had gone and induced her as we haven't heard from mumbles in a while?

mears · 17/05/2008 06:16

looking out for birth announcement

nappyaddict · 19/05/2008 02:37

can't believe there's still no news!! i suppose if she wasn't induced until thursday she might still be in labour.

whomovedmychocolate · 20/05/2008 20:47

Blimey, I'd be driving to the nearest decent maternity unit and camping out in the car park if I was her. Hope she's all right.

mears · 24/05/2008 14:31

?