Page 3 | Your healing of forceps and episiotomy

anonny55 · 2025-01-09T14:33:38+00:00

If you had forceps and episiotomy what was your healing like? Did everything go back to looking how it was before after? If so how long did it take? How was the pain afterwards? How long did it takes for the pain to reside? Thanks!

Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 04:38

@Engineerbynature wow so sorry you and baby went through something so awful. I'm definitely pro c section for baby's safety so far. I'd love for him to be in less stress and potential pain as possible!

I'm struggling with anxiety thinking about walking into theatre and willingly lying down on a surgeons bed while awake, and the recovery seems tricky which is fine once home but this is dc1 and not only do I not have a donkeys what I'm doing, DP cannot stay outside of visiting hours and I'm worried I'll struggle to tend to baby😅

OP posts:

MsCactus · 11/01/2025 08:09

Engineerbynature · 11/01/2025 03:54

I have had both types of deliveries, and they could not have been more different. Of course there is no way to predict whether you would have an easier or more difficult instrumental delivery, but if the latter, it can be very difficult indeed, both on yourself and baby. I would outright refuse any form of instrumental delivery after my experiences. The c-section delivery was far easier on both me and my baby, and it seemed significantly safer for us both.

After a very long and complicated labour, my first child was delivered with ventouse which failed halfway through, then followed by forceps with episiotomy. I tried to refuse instrumental delivery in favour of a c-section, but they made it clear that would not be happening. It was a very chaotic and frightening experience. The baby was almost 9 lbs and in a very strange position, which perhaps made it a more difficult instrumental delivery than others. I had tremendous pain for about 8 weeks afterwards despite being told repeatedly that my stitches were healing well. Walking and sitting were both very difficult during that time. I was still having moderate pelvic pain 6 months later and mild pain several years later. I had rectal prolapse which was resolved eventually but still have a lasting rectocele. I did do pelvic floor PT eventually which finally helped resolve some of the lingering pain.

The other factor to consider is which delivery might be less risky for baby. As bad as the delivery and recovery was for me, the hardest part was actually the effects on my baby. He had severe lacerations on his face from the forceps, including one over his eye which caused it to swell shut. They weren't sure for some time whether it had affected that eye. Also he had a huge wound on the top of his head from the ventouse cup along with swelling. They had to monitor the swelling as whilst some swelling is normal, his was quite extreme and worsening. He quickly developed bad jaundice which was almost certainly exacerbated by the wounds he sustained. He needed 5 days of double phototherapy, and it had gotten so bad at one point that they were discussing performing a complete blood transfusion with us. Luckily, he had a sudden improvement on the 5th day, and it was not necessary. He was a very unhappy newborn and seemed to me to be in a lot of pain himself, as more often than not he was completely inconsolable with a very shrill cry. He was extremely sensitive to anything touching his head for months.

We were in the hospital for 6 days after delivery, and I was an emotional wreck, both because of how awful delivery was and for being terrified for my baby's sake during that time. We could not hold him to comfort him properly, as he had to stay in the incubator under light therapy.

My second child was an elective c-section, after I demanded one. I actually can't imagine a more lovely experience. The delivery was calm and peaceful. I was able to walk and sit better almost immediately after the spinal block wore off. I was getting around far better at 1 week post c-section than at 6 weeks post-instrumental delivery. My total pain throughout this delivery and recovery was probably well under 1% that I experienced with my first delivery and recovery. Baby cried for normal newborn reasons and not constantly inconsolably as my first had. It was lovely to be able to just enjoy those first days and to bond with baby after delivery.

Requesting an elective c-section for my second was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

I'm really sorry you went through all that with your first. I did want to add my positive experience though - after an episotomy and ventose induction, my baby didn't have any damage at all. Not even a red ring, cone shape head or any bruising.

I think forceps are worse than ventose though in terms of recovery

MsCactus · 11/01/2025 08:12

OP, rather than the weight, can I ask what percentile your baby's head is expected to be?

My DD had a 40 percentile head circumference - and all my friends who haven't recovered well from vaginal deliveries had babies with very large heads (90 percentile plus). So personally I'd look at that rather than the overall predicted baby weight, to factor into my decision

Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 10:40

MsCactus · 11/01/2025 08:12

OP, rather than the weight, can I ask what percentile your baby's head is expected to be?

My DD had a 40 percentile head circumference - and all my friends who haven't recovered well from vaginal deliveries had babies with very large heads (90 percentile plus). So personally I'd look at that rather than the overall predicted baby weight, to factor into my decision

Hey, 98th centille head! Xx

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Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 10:42

@MsCactus which I'm not shocked by! Both me and DP had to be ventoused out as we both had huge heads. My baby's belly is 96th centile though (no GD been tested 3 times). Mine and DP parents dont recollect us having big belly's like that! Consultant said even if the head comes out, huge belly's can also cause them to get stuck and cause complications😣

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MrsDoof · 11/01/2025 11:17

Straightomyhead · 10/01/2025 12:01

So I had forceps and episiotomy with my first. The birth was under a spinal so it was fine. Just weird pushing with no contractions.

Healing was quite slow for me. My stitches came apart slightly and there was gapping which took longer to heal. I kept up with pain killers. Don't try and stop these as they really do help.

I didn't have a problem sitting don't but I didn't like it if someone was sitting on the same cushion as me on the sofa in case it moved. Overall I think my recovery was good, just very slow.

If you do end up having forceps, it's not as bad as some people make out and take things really slow in the first few days and then keep up with pain medication for longer than you think.

It is as bad as some people ‘make out’ though, for them, lots of people have really negative and traumatic births with forceps and episiotomy and that shouldn’t be minimised because you didn’t have that same experience.

MassiveSalad22 · 11/01/2025 12:29

MrsDoof · 11/01/2025 11:17

It is as bad as some people ‘make out’ though, for them, lots of people have really negative and traumatic births with forceps and episiotomy and that shouldn’t be minimised because you didn’t have that same experience.

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Exactly. It’s not a competition nor a race to the bottom. But people have different experiences and different tolerances. For example @Straightomyhead had forceps with a spinal……. Very different to forceps with ZERO pain relief (me) 😂

Also people talking about tears who didn’t have forceps - I’m sure that’s a totally different kettle of fish - it’s the force of the instruments that can have a massive effect on your pelvic floor, tear or not.

Darkdiamond · 11/01/2025 16:54

MassiveSalad22 · 11/01/2025 12:29

Exactly. It’s not a competition nor a race to the bottom. But people have different experiences and different tolerances. For example @Straightomyhead had forceps with a spinal……. Very different to forceps with ZERO pain relief (me) 😂

Also people talking about tears who didn’t have forceps - I’m sure that’s a totally different kettle of fish - it’s the force of the instruments that can have a massive effect on your pelvic floor, tear or not.

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Yes, the forceps tore me inside and they couldn't stop the bleeding. They had to pack my vagina full of bandages overnight to stem the blood flow while they gave me a blood transfusion as I lost so much blood from the internal wound.

You bet I had a c section next time! 😄

Cece92 · 11/01/2025 16:58

I had forceps, and recovery wasn't the best. I had a haemorrhage aswell and the placenta got stuck. They gave me some strong painkillers after for a few weeks but my EX had to go back to work a few days later and I didn't trust being on my own with a baby on them. I also ended up with really swollen legs after which can be normal but it made moving harder. I bathed my self with nothing but warm water for a couple weeks down below. X

Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 17:25

@Cece92 from most comments it seems forcep recovery can also be really hard and painful..thinking of just doing for elcs at this rate as it seems they'll both have painful recovery anyway!

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Cece92 · 11/01/2025 18:23

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 17:25

@Cece92 from most comments it seems forcep recovery can also be really hard and painful..thinking of just doing for elcs at this rate as it seems they'll both have painful recovery anyway!

I was told if I were to have anymore children to consider an elective section. I've never had anymore since my DD11. However if I'm fortunate enough to ever have anymore I would, as much as I'd love a lovely water birth lol! Xx

Darkdiamond · 11/01/2025 18:54

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 17:25

@Cece92 from most comments it seems forcep recovery can also be really hard and painful..thinking of just doing for elcs at this rate as it seems they'll both have painful recovery anyway!

I definitely would opt for the c section if someone told me forceps would be likely. Although, if someone told me any kind of childbirth would be a likely outcome at the end of a pregnancy, I'd make the same choice!

WickWood · 11/01/2025 19:55

I had episiotomy and ventouse delivery. I honestly had no pain at all, I realise I was very lucky, but just showing you it doesn't always have to be horrific. I could do everything fine, wouldn't have even known to be honest, didn't need painkillers.

The induction, however, was brutal... Its hard to say what I'd do if I did it all again, it all worked out fine and I am glad I didn't have a section in the end (failed 5 day induction, was awaiting a section but baby came spontaneously) x

WickWood · 11/01/2025 19:56

Just to add, I had the episiotomy and ventouse with no pain relief (not by choice, I wanted anything they could give me but it was all too quick) and they were fine x

blackbadger · 11/01/2025 20:25

I was induced at 41w with DC1, which ended with forceps and an episiotomy. Prior to labour, the one thing I didn't want to happen was a forceps birth. Recovery was okay, it was painful and moving around on a bed was sore but it wasn't unmanageable and I was up and about 2 days after birth, going to supermarket etc and have had no lasting effects. I do know of people who had much worse experiences with an episiotomy though.
My baby was 7lb7 but had a 98 centile head.

I'm pregnant with my second current and almost certain I will be going for an ELCS - the only hesitation with a c section for me if the recovery and lack of driving for 6 weeks. I live slightly rurally with two dogs.

I hope whatever decision you choose goes well xx

Abandonedbypals · 11/01/2025 20:36

Please ask a consultant (not a midwife) about the extent to which forceps increase your risk of prolapse. I knew nothing about this at all - an episiotomy with extra tearing, three failed attempts with the ventouse and two tries with the forceps means I'm now an expert, with grade 2 prolapses of both anterior and posterior walls of the vagina. It's not life ruining, but I have mild symptoms probably 75% of the time, and problems with constipation and sex. Not looking forward to menopause, and I'm unlikely to have a second baby as I'm too worried about it getting worse and the NHS basically leaving me with my organs outside my body. (Surgery isn't an option until you're past childbearing age)

50% of women have some degree of prolapse after having a baby, most of whom won't have any symptoms. But forceps are pretty much the single biggest contributor to prolapse.

Knowing what I know now, if someone had said it was going to be a C section or forceps, I would 100% go C section.

Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 20:44

blackbadger · 11/01/2025 20:25

I was induced at 41w with DC1, which ended with forceps and an episiotomy. Prior to labour, the one thing I didn't want to happen was a forceps birth. Recovery was okay, it was painful and moving around on a bed was sore but it wasn't unmanageable and I was up and about 2 days after birth, going to supermarket etc and have had no lasting effects. I do know of people who had much worse experiences with an episiotomy though.
My baby was 7lb7 but had a 98 centile head.

I'm pregnant with my second current and almost certain I will be going for an ELCS - the only hesitation with a c section for me if the recovery and lack of driving for 6 weeks. I live slightly rurally with two dogs.

I hope whatever decision you choose goes well xx

You too!!

I also live rurally but luckily this is dc1 , no pets and DP off work for 6 weeks when baby comes so I should just be able to relax at home and recover with plenty of help.

How comes your having an elcs this time round? Because of what happened with dc1? Xx

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Original poster

anonny55 · 11/01/2025 20:51

@Abandonedbypals so sorry you have to live with that! I feel most say vaginal is best..it may well be if there's no serious tears cuts or instruments used..which isn't very often by the looks of it😅

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FusionChefGeoff · 11/01/2025 20:53

Forceps was brutal and, followed by a big baby number 2 means I have prolapses and stress incontinence 10 years later so the consequences are longer lasting than a c section in my experience.

I also remember being VERY uncomfortable and finding BF very difficult as I couldn't sit comfortably or get a good position etc